When I met you

Ruse

Akermisia Miller

The clinic was relatively crowded this morning, the gray chairs in the reception area occupied by downcast people staring at their phones or older patients with their eyes fixed on the news playing on the small television mounted high on the wall.

Beside me, Livia was nervous, flipping through the pages of a magazine while her mind was clearly somewhere else. The night she told me she was pregnant, I was stunned—so surprised that I barely managed to comfort her. The next day, after classes, I spent hours trying to schedule a blood test for Liv, but every hospital and clinic in the area was fully booked, and the earliest appointment available was today.

We were missing Communication and Politics class, but it was for a good reason.

— The tests could be wrong, right? False positives happen. — she asks quietly, her eyes still on the magazine.

— Do you want them to be? — I raise my gaze to her, but she doesn’t answer.

When Adam came to see me the night before, I was so nervous about the secret that he noticed something was wrong almost immediately.

If Livia was really pregnant, Leonardo Coleman was the father, and Melchior was his best friend. How was I supposed not to act differently? We already had enough conflicts and unspoken things between us to build walls in our complicated and strange relationship. Just the idea of me being with another guy had driven him mad—him, of all people, a soul so free.

But I couldn’t afford to think about us. Not now, with Liv needing me.

— Livia Sherwood. — a gentle voice calls.

Liv gets to her feet quickly, and I follow her toward the figure whose eyes are fixed on a metallic clipboard.

— That’s me… — Liv says nervously, her fingers gripping the strap of her purse tightly.

The young woman in scrubs lifts her eyes. She’s beautiful. Blonde, petite, green-eyed.

It’s strange. Her delicate face seems surprisingly familiar.

— Okay. You came in for a blood draw for a Quantitative Beta hCG test, correct? — the blonde asks.

Liv blinks slowly, her eyes frozen as she struggles to keep her breathing under control.

— That’s right. — I answer for my friend, stepping closer and holding her arm. Otherwise, I don’t think her feet would move. — I can go with her, right?

— Of course. That’s not a problem. Come with me, I’ll take you to the room.

The hallway we enter is brightly lit, the unusual silence almost intimidating.

— You go to the university, don’t you? — I ask the girl, suddenly curious. And also in a desperate attempt to break that crushing silence.

— Yes. — her eyes lift. — I think we’ve seen each other before. I’m studying Business Administration.

— Ah, that makes sense. Our classrooms are usually close to each other. — I comment.

She nods, considering for a few seconds before clicking her tongue lightly.

— We have a class at the same time on Thursday afternoons.

— That’s true. — I remember. — Ah, I’m always sleepy during that class…

— Tell me about it. That time slot after lunch drains everyone.

Liv, beside me, seems to relax the muscles in her arm as our conversation continues.

Good.

I really wanted to distract her.

— I’m Cassie. — the blonde says with a polite smile, her shoulder-length hair swaying slightly.

— Akermisia. — I smile. — And this is my roommate… Well, you already know her name…

Cassie smiles, while Liv beside me grows tense again. I think she didn’t want to involve more people in this. Imagine if the news reached Leonardo’s ears the wrong way—or even worse, his family’s.

The blonde girl seems to study her fearful expression, carefully assessing my best friend before lowering her voice and saying:

— Don’t worry, Livia. I won’t tell anyone about this. I’m not a doctor, but I faithfully follow patient confidentiality policies. The results will probably be ready this afternoon. When I finish my shift, I can bring them to you discreetly. I think that would spare you some stress, of course, if you don’t think that’s a bad ide—

— I’d actually love that. — Liv finally finds her voice.

The three of us are standing by the doorway when my best friend grabs Cassie’s arm.

— Thank you.

— There’s no need to thank me. — she says.

Her voice is so calm and steady. I envy that girl’s perfect diction.

A tourniquet is placed above Liv’s vein while I hold her hand the entire time. The blood draw is done quickly, and after that, we head back to the university.

The test results wouldn’t be ready until the end of the day, which meant entire classes passing by in a blur.

✶

At seven o’clock, Cassie shows up at our dorm. We had exchanged phone numbers after the appointment, where I sent her the room location and dormitory block through a text message.

— I brought food. — Cassie announces.

She’s wearing a short, flowy floral dress that highlights her delicate beauty as she walks in.

— Homemade food, seriously? — Liv practically throws herself at Cass when she removes the lid from the casserole dish and reveals a homemade meal. — I think I love you, Cassie. I was getting sick of eating junk food… Akermisia is addicted to fast food and those tasteless prepackaged salads.

— Hey! — I scold, but the smell was so good it was hard not to agree.

Liv attacks the dish.

Actually, all of us do.

We sit on the floor eating, talking, and drinking juice as if the result inside the white envelope resting in Cass’s bag wasn’t about to turn the world upside down.

It’s a strange kind of normalcy.

A welcome and comforting one after the last forty-eight hours of… madness.

When the food is gone and we’re all too full to keep discussing random topics, the silence makes it clear that there is no escaping the truth.

— My parents are so traditional and conservative… — Liv breaks the silence.

Her voice is low and melancholic when she finally finds the courage to face us.

— I was raised believing I’d find perfect love, a prince who would do anything for me. We’d get married and buy a house in the suburbs. The children would come after we were financially stable, and I’d take them to church every Sunday. I was supposed to have a perfect family. Finish college first, and only then have all those things. But now… — she sniffles. — I waited so long only to end up pregnant by a guy I know isn’t in love with me. If I go through with this, I’ll be doing it alone, and my parents’ dream will be ruined along with it. After that, what man is going to want a woman who’s been abandoned with another man’s child? And how am I even supposed to finish college and provide for this baby? — Liv bites her lip, trying to hold back an avalanche of emotions. — My parents worked so hard to get me here, and in the end I’m going to ruin everything with a pregnancy.

— You might not be pregnant. — Cass comments, placing the envelope in my friend’s hands.

Liv stares at the paper.

— But if you are, I’m sure your parents won’t love you any less for it.

— And you won’t be alone. — I move closer. — We’ll figure something out, Liv. We can get part-time jobs, rent a house. It’ll work out, you’ll see. I’m not letting go of your hand.

My friend’s chin trembles as she breaks the seal and reads what is written inside.

One second later, when she brings both hands to her head, I already know the answer.

She really is pregnant.

Cass and I exchange a glance before wrapping Liv in a shared hug.

We had only met Cassie recently, but I was genuinely glad it had happened. More than ever, Livia was going to need people supporting her, and Cass had been so kind and helpful.

— Good thing I didn’t buy cheap wine. — I say.

Liv smiles through her tears.

I pull away from the hug and wipe the tears running down her cheeks.

She looked so completely lost.

— What do I do n-now? — she asks.

Her voice cracks, and the lump in her throat almost keeps her from finishing the sentence.

— It’s your choice, Liv. Yours alone. But no matter what you decide, we’ll support you. — I say.

Cass nods in agreement.

— I can arrange an appointment if you don’t want to continue the pregnancy. And I can also recommend a great doctor for prenatal care if you decide to keep the baby.

Liv nods slowly, still trying to process everything.

She was really pregnant.

— You need to tell him. You know that, right? — I say.

My friend swallows hard.

— Why? — she clears her throat. — I already know what his answer will be.

— It doesn’t matter if he’s an i***t. The father has the right to know, Liv.

She forces a smile.

— I know.

She admits it, drawing in a deep breath and letting it out as though that alone could gather the courage slipping through her pores.

— I’ll tell him. Just not today. I need to be more stable before dealing with him.

— That’s okay… — I smile. — In your own time.