MORE THAN MISTLETOE

PREPARATION

Chapter 2

Ethan's POV

Ethan had been standing on the porch for twenty minutes, pretending he wasn't waiting.

"You know they can't see you yet, right?" Liam said from where he was sprawled on the porch swing, his phone in hand. "The driveway is like a quarter mile long."

"I'm not—" Ethan started, then stopped.

There was no point in lying to Liam. His younger brother had an annoying habit of seeing straight through him.

"I'm just getting some air."

"Sure. In December. When it's thirty degrees out." Liam looked up from his phone, grinning.

"You've been 'getting air' for the past twenty minutes. Face it, man, you're waiting for her."

Ethan shoved his hands deeper into his pockets and didn't answer. Liam laughed, but it wasn't mean—it never was. For all his teasing, Liam understood.

He'd been there for the past eight months, watching Ethan try and fail to stop thinking about Maya.

"Is Vanessa coming by today?" Liam asked, and Ethan felt his shoulders tense.

"Tomorrow. She has a work thing tonight."

"Convenient."

"Liam—"

"I'm just saying," Liam held up his hands in mock surrender, "it's interesting timing. Maya arrives today, Vanessa arrives tomorrow. Like you needed one more day before..." He trailed off meaningfully.

Before what? Before introducing his girlfriend to the girl he'd been in love with for years? Before watching Maya meet Vanessa and realizing that Ethan had moved on, or tried to, or was still trying to?

"Vanessa is great," Ethan said, and he meant it. She was great—smart, funny, ambitious. She worked in marketing at a tech startup and had goals and plans and a clear vision for her future. She was exactly the kind of person Ethan should be with.

Should be. That was the problem, wasn't it?

"She is great," Liam agreed. "But is she Maya?"

"That's not fair."

"Life's not fair, big brother. Love definitely isn't."

Ethan didn't respond. What could he say? That he'd been trying for a year to feel for Vanessa what he'd always felt for Maya? That every time Vanessa laughed, part of him wished it was Maya's laugh instead? That he'd started this relationship hoping it would finally erase Maya from his heart, only to find that she was more permanently etched there than ever?

"I'm with Vanessa now," Ethan said finally. "Maya and I... that ship sailed a long time ago."

"Did it? Or did you just never let it leave the harbor?"

Before Ethan could answer, his mom's voice called from inside: "Boys! Can one of you help me with this garland?"

"Saved by the mom," Liam said, standing up and stretching. "But we're talking about this later."

"No, we're not."

"Yes, we are."

They went inside, where the house smelled like pine and cinnamon and home. Carol had outdone herself this year—the tree was already up in the living room, white lights twinkling, and garland was draped over every available surface. Christmas music played softly from the speakers, some Bing Crosby song that made Ethan think of childhood, of simpler times.

Of times when his dad was still around.

"There you are," his mom said, looking up from where she was wrestling with a particularly stubborn piece of garland. She was in her element like this, surrounded by decorations and warmth, creating the kind of home his father had never deserved. "Can you hang this over the doorway? I can't quite reach."

Ethan took the garland, breathing in the scent of fresh pine. "You really went all out this year."

"It's a special year," Carol said, and there was something in her voice that made Ethan look at her more closely. She was smiling, that knowing mother-smile that had always made him nervous. "Diana and her family arriving, three whole weeks together, Christmas and New Year's... it's going to be wonderful."

"Mom—"

"I'm not saying anything," she said innocently, which meant she was absolutely saying something. "I'm just happy to have everyone together. That's all."

Liam snorted from across the room, and Ethan shot him a look.

"They should be here soon," Carol continued, checking her watch. "Diana texted about an hour ago. Oh, Ethan, did you put fresh towels in the guest rooms?"

"Yes, Mom."

"And the good soap? The lavender one Maya likes?"

"Yes, Mom."

Carol beamed at him, and Ethan felt heat creep up his neck. It was one thing for Liam to tease him, but his mother's matchmaking was on a whole different level. She and Diana had been best friends since college, and Ethan knew—he knew—that they'd been hoping for years that he and Maya would end up together.

Which only made everything more complicated.

"I'm going to make the hot chocolate," Carol announced. "The special recipe."

"With the cinnamon?" Liam asked.

"Of course with the

cinnamon. Maya loves it that way."

Ethan hung the garland over the doorway and tried not to think about how much he'd remembered about Maya over the years. How she took her hot chocolate. How she liked her eggs scrambled, not fried. How she always tucked her hair behind her left ear when she was nervous. How her laugh sounded different depending on whether she was genuinely amused or just being polite.

How two years ago, she'd sat on his back porch and cried over some college boyfriend who hadn't deserved her, and Ethan had wanted to drive to her university and punch the guy in the face.

But he hadn't. Because he was her friend. Her brother's best friend. The guy who gave advice and listened and kept his feelings locked away where they couldn't ruin everything.

"Car!" Liam suddenly shouted, pressing his face against the front window. "They're here!"

Ethan's heart kicked into a higher gear, and he hated himself for it. He was twenty-four years old and in a relationship, for God's sake. He should have better control than this.

But then Carol was rushing to the door, and Liam was whooping and heading outside, and Ethan had no choice but to follow.

The SUV pulled up to the house, and through the windshield, Ethan could see them—Diana in the front seat, already smiling, Alex driving, and in the back...

Maya.

Eight months. It had been eight months since Easter, since he'd last seen her, and Ethan had told himself that the distance would help. That time would dull the ache of wanting something he couldn't have.

He'd been wrong.

The car doors opened, and suddenly everyone was piling out, and his mom was hugging Diana like they hadn't spent three hours on the phone just last week, and Liam was doing that ridiculous handshake with Alex, and through it all, Ethan's eyes found Maya.

She looked different. Not in any way he could specifically name—her hair was still long and dark, her eyes still that warm brown that reminded him of autumn, her smile still the one that had been haunting his dreams for years. But there was something about her, some subtle shift in the way she carried herself, that made his breath catch.

She'd grown up.

Somewhere in the past eight months, while he'd been trying to convince himself he was over her, Maya had crossed some invisible line from girl to woman, and the realization hit Ethan like a punch to the chest.

Their eyes met across the driveway, and for a moment—just a moment—Ethan forgot how to breathe.

He tried to school his expression into something neutral, something brotherly and safe. He couldn't let her see what he was feeling. He'd kept this secret for years; he could keep it a little longer.

Even if it killed him.

"Maya," he said when he reached her, and he was proud of how steady his voice sounded. Like his heart wasn't trying to beat its way out of his chest. Like he wasn't memorizing every detail of her face.

"Hi," she said, and there was something in her voice—nervousness? awareness?—that made him wonder if she could feel it too, this electric current that seemed to run between them.

No. He was imagining it. Projecting. Hoping.

They hugged, and Ethan allowed himself exactly three seconds to hold her close, to breathe in the scent of her shampoo (still coconut, he noted), to feel the way she fit against him like she'd been designed for this exact purpose.

Then he forced himself to let go.

"How was the drive?" he asked.