"Dang! Was that the last time you both talked? Bro, why didn't you tell me this before now?"
"With all that's going on with your weekly columns and edits, I didn't want to burden you with tales of my depressing love life. It's been weeks since he told me I broke his trust before heading back to his apartment. I haven't seen him around much either."
"Aww. My bro's so in love."
"Don't start your teasing, you asswipe. It's all my fault. I'd never drink vodka again."
"Bro, the second-hand embarrassment I felt for you when you told me you'd confessed you'd watched his s*x tape... you're so wrong in this. He has every right to be upset. You drew the line on that one. Have you even thought about apologizing?"
"But I did what every human being in my place would do. I satisfied my curiosity."
