The Pains of Guilt

Chapter 23

Twilight POV

I arrived at the address I was given. It wasn't as far as I thought it was, just an hour's drive from the pack in a nearby suburb. It was a pretty quiet place and from the scents I got, it was also filled with humans. A wolf and a demon living together among humans. I wonder how well that worked out. Speaking of, I'm part demon. A lot to take in but it does explain a few things. It just dawned on me that Tsumi is part wolf, demon and human. Wow.

I knocked on the door and waited. Honestly, I don't know how to feel. Nervous? Happy? I don't even know what I should say. I mean, supposedly, I haven't seen them in 13 years. But even so, I only found out a few hours ago that they exist. Come to think of it, why didn't my dad bring it up years ago? Actually, considering the past few years, I can see how he never really got the chance to.

I was snapped out of it when someone answered the door. It was an elderly man, about 6'2, he didn't exactly look elderly but I assumed that he would if he's in his late fifties or early sixties. He looked good for his age and by that I mean he's in good shape. Not old and decrepit like I thought he'd be. He did have salt and pepper hair though. That and the few wrinkles on his forehead were the only things that gave away that he's an old man. His eyes were a really dark, almost black, brown colour and they looked at me with surprise.

"Eumelia." He called, probably my grandma.

"Who's at the door?" Came another voice.

A woman came to the door. She had chestnut hair with a few grey streaks in it and her eyes were more on the green side compared to mine so they were teal rather than turquoise and held the same surprised look but with tears glazing them. Now I see where Mama Wolf, Tsumi and I get our eye colour. I can also see her in both of them. I half expected her to have horns or a tail or something that gave away that she’s a demon but she doesn’t. She looks completely normal, human even but then again, not all demons necessarily look the part. Just like Alex’s dad. Actually, she doesn’t look Japanese either but it’s probably because of her eyes and hair. And get this, she's around 5'4. This is so unfair, why am I the only one in the family who's very much below average height? But that wasn't the main problem. The main problem is that I haven't thought of what I should say. 'Hey, I'm your granddaughter who just discovered that you existed a few hours ago.' Not much of a conversation starter if you ask me.

But I didn't need to say anything because they both gave me a hug.

"We didn't think that you'd ever show up." My grandma said.

"I would've come sooner if I hadn't found out about you guys only a few hours ago. And I actually didn't come alone."

"Me too, hugs too." Natsumi said.

"Is she..."

"Yeah."

"Come inside."

Five minutes. That's how long we've been sitting in awkward silence. I would've started the conversation first if I knew where to start.

"So you know everything?" He asked me.

"Yep."

"Do you hate us?" My grandma asked.

"To be honest, I have no clue on what I feel. I don't think it's hate, though, because I don't think that it makes sense to hate someone I don't know. But I do want to know why grandpa did what he did."

"I'm sure your father already told you that your other grandfather and I were best friends. He was a pure and kind soul. I don't know why but one day, he changed. He started talking about how the weak had no place in the world. He was planning to eradicate weak packs. We're talking about hundreds of wolves being massacred. I tried every means possible to talk him out of it but he wouldn't listen. His mate also tried, but it was in vain. Yes, he was my best friend but I couldn't stand by and watch innocent lives being taken. Even if it meant betraying him. Taking him out was the last thing I wanted to do but he was too far gone to be reasoned with so I had no choice. But don't think less of him; he was once a good man. I'll never know what had gotten into him but the real him would've never even thought about doing something like that. That much I know."

"How did you do it?"

"Wolfsbane. He loved having a glass of whiskey after a day's work. I waited for the right moment to slip some in. I wanted him to at least have a quick and painless death. My last words to him were I'm sorry. I'm sure your father told you the rest."

"Yeah."

So other grandpa liked whiskey. I guess that’s who I got it from.

"Your father is a very forgiving wolf. After I explained myself to him, he somewhat understood. Partially because I was also his mate's father and he didn't want her to hate him. There's another reason why I had to move to out of the pack. Everything reminded me of me of your father's father; the guilt of murdering my own best friend was too much to handle. Even now, I still can't get over it. I don't think I ever will."

"Although it doesn't sit well with me and I'm not saying that it's 100% ok, I think that you kind of did the right thing. It doesn't sound like it was an easy decision either."

I then noticed something out of the corner of my eye. When I looked, it was framed photos and not just any photos. One was of Mama Wolf and the other one was of...me? I remember seeing it in my photo album.

"I was five." I told them.

"When what happened?" My grandma asked.

"The photo."

"Oh. We know that you were. Your parents would always send us copies of whatever photos they took of you and messages about anything interesting that you did. We would’ve liked for you to visit sometimes but we told your parents not to because we didn’t want you to be too attached for when you found out everything. We did write back and send birthday and Christmas presents." She explained. That explains the extra gifts. "But one about you starting to train at such a young age was the one that almost gave me a heart attack."

"She actually cried for days.”

“While he couldn’t be prouder. But we were both proud of you when he told us that you took over and were doing a good job. He also said that you became a little unreserved and anti-social over the last 3 years. I was a little worried that you’d become a sociopath but he said he had everything under control.”

I have no words for those last two. Unreserved I can understand because I’ve always been blunt and maybe I’ve been a little insensitive for the past few years. But I’m definitely not anything close to a sociopath or anti-social. And the anti-social part could just be because I’m interested in going on dates with guys but I have friends and that’s good enough for me. It doesn’t mean I’m anti-social. Asexual maybe but not anti-social.

“The one I found most interesting was the one where you chewed through any piece of furniture that you came across when you began teething.” My grandpa said. “And when you burned one of the old Demon King's houses down when you were seven."

"Correction, I accidentally burned it down."

Everyone else will say that I burned it down but I swear that it was an accident. I kind of got away with it because I was only seven. The only reaction the King had was shock and so did everyone else. Not even my parents knew what to do with me after that. And you can't really charge a seven-year-old with arson because I mean, what motive would I have at that age? It wasn't even the age where I discovered that revenge is best served cold. Afterwards, I wasn't allowed set foot in his domain for a while. At least I learned to never leave a magnifying glass lying near a window after playing with it.

"I'm not sure if I believe that. We also heard that you found your mate but after that they stopped being frequent. What happened?" He asked.

"I technically moved out."

"But look at you now, you're all grown up and you look so much like your mother. A little on the short side but still grown up. With your own pup even. What's her name?"

"Me Natsumi and is one."

That made them smile. And I can’t deny that it was adorable that she introduced herself.

"Speaking of, where's your mate? We'd like to meet our grandson-in-law too."

"About that, there's no grandson-in-law."

"You're not married yet? Don't worry about that; your grandfather and I also weren't married when we were expecting your mother. Your parents actually got married the week after they found out about you."

"I meant that he and I aren't together. Things didn't exactly work out."

"That doesn't make sense. If you two mated and were expecting a pup, then he wouldn't leave. The wolf in him wouldn't allow that."

"Two words: human mate. And I'm the one who left him. I didn't find out about Natsumi until two weeks after we split up and neither did he until two weeks ago."

"A human mate? I don’t think your father told us anything about that. He did tell us about you being engaged but not that he was human. We also didn’t know anything about you having a pup."

“Yeah. Long story short, my first mate rejected me then my second one turned out to be human. Things were ok with him until I found out that he’s been seeing another woman. I think that’s why he never mentioned it. But I kind of still have a mate bond with Natsumi’s father because I forgot to reject him. I still want nothing to do with him though.”

"If I were you, I wouldn't be taking the bond so lightly. Believe it or not, your grandmother used to hate me even after I told her that we were mates. She felt that I only liked her because of that."

“I actually I also used to hate him because he always used to pronounce my name incorrectly. Because of his accent, it always came out as Amelia or Ameria. I knew he couldn’t help it but it was still irritating.”

“What do you mean by his accent? It sounds normal to me.”

“I take it your father forgot to mention that I’m Grecian. You grandfather and I met while he was travelling.”

Now my first name makes a lot more sense and why I look slightly mixed. I thought that it was just because of my hair and eyes.

“I also take it that he didn’t mention that I’m a succubus.”

Ok, that also explains a lot.

“Oh.”

“Not the kind that everyone knows about. Those are the primary types. I’m the secondary type.”

“What’s the difference?”

“The secondary types just cause others’ arousal with just a look. On command of course but sometimes it happens accidentally.”

That’s not half as bad but it still explains a lot. I wonder if I can do the same. Not as much as her, obviously, but to a certain extent. Actually now that I think about it, I think I can. At least, it happened a lot with Takumi but I thought it was a mate thing. I thought it was a little weird since him being more human than wolf meant our bond wasn’t that strong but I didn’t think much of it. But now it makes a little more sense. And so does what had happened with Alex last night. But why hasn’t it happened with anyone else? Not that I’d want it to; I’m just curious. Unless if it only happens with people who like me or something which might be that certain extent. And I guess it’d have to be them looking into my eyes for a really long time since nothing happened all the times I’ve looked at them or in their general direction. Unless if it can. This is confusing.

"Back to what I was trying to say before, honey, if he ever loved you half as much as you did him then there must be a reason why he did what he did. Men can be downright stupid sometimes when they're head over heels for someone. Your grandfather was."