TAINTED HEARTS (ENGLISH)

TAINTED HEARTS 09

Chapter 09

The next day, I was nervous when I opened the classroom door for his subject. I didn’t know how I was going to face him. But when I opened it, he wasn’t there. I didn’t know what I should feel. Did I breathe easier because he wasn’t there, or did my chest tighten more because I expected to see him but he wasn’t there?

For the next three days, it was the same. He didn’t show up after he kissed me. He only left tasks and lessons for us to study. Did he regret it? Was he just surprised that time and also scared someone might catch us and he’d lose his job?

When two weeks passed and he still hadn’t come, I eventually managed to get him out of my system, especially since I got busy with subject requirements. If he wasn’t going to attend and I wouldn’t see him, I thought I could also forget that I was once attracted to him.

“Join us instead, Xena! You’d be better as our model!”

“Looks like she already signed with another group!”

“Aww! That’s a waste!”

My circle grew in school because I had more people to talk to. I couldn’t say they were my friends, but smiles and greetings were enough.

Many also invited me to join their groups for school extracurricular activities. But I preferred the volunteer group for community service. Minerva, Josh, and I got separated since we chose different activities.

Everyone became busier, especially with Christmas drawing near, which meant another break for the students. Other groups would go on vacation, while the group I joined decided we would help the needy while classes were off.

All of my fellow group members were kind and humble—even though I knew some of them were rich. It was nice that on the first day, my view of the wealthy students here changed, since I usually only heard about their luxuries. But when I joined the volunteer group made up of people from high status who also had good hearts, my respect for them grew more.

You cannot judge a person just because of their status. In every place we visited, we often picked up lessons. We helped, and by the end of the day, we all smiled together.

There are many far-off places we don’t see or pay attention to, and once you see them, you’ll only say you are lucky for what you have. We throw away things that, for them, are treasures. We waste food that, for them, is a huge blessing.

“Sir!”

I had just taken my things out of my bag when I heard the girls screaming.

“Sir! Why were you absent for a whole month? Abigail missed you!”

I heard a deep laugh from a man. I looked to the front. Sir Lennox was standing behind the desk with both hands resting on top of it.

“Shhh.” He placed a finger over his lips. “Keep your voice down, class!”

“Why did you only come now, sir? Were you sick? Did you go abroad on vacation?”

Our eyes met. He looked away and answered the student.

“Yeah. Yeah. Business trip.” He turned to the board and wrote. “Keep all your personal questions, and let’s start with this subject.”

He was discussing when my group excused me. Millie asked permission for me. I stood up. He was watching me as I walked out. He seemed like he wanted to ask why I had to be excused but chose to continue the discussion instead.

For the next two weeks, I hardly saw Sir Lennox because every day I was excused from his class. My group’s schedule always fell on his subject, so I missed it to attend meetings and planning.

“Why are you always making excuses for her? Is that meeting necessary?”

Millie pressed her lips together. It was the third week she was picking me up from his class. With Sir Lennox’s serious voice, even the school director would probably stammer answering him. She raised a hand to signal me to step out.

“You can leave for now, Ms. Peña Vega. But make sure to go to my office later and explain after that meeting.”

“Yes, sir!”

I hurriedly walked to Millie. We left the classroom together.

“That was embarrassing! I got scolded! You should have told him earlier so he wouldn’t think badly of me every time I excuse you! Go to his office later, okay? I don’t want to get scolded again!”

“Okay,” I simply answered.

I didn’t understand a thing during the meeting. I didn’t even suggest much. What was on my mind was that I would be going to Sir Lennox’s office later. He had been gone for a month, and when he finally came back, I was always leaving his class. I didn’t know if I had gotten used to his presence, since I didn’t feel nervous whenever I saw him. Or maybe because we still hadn’t really talked again.

“Come in!” he said from inside when I knocked.

I turned the doorknob—it was already open. It seemed he was expecting me. The room was cold. If he hadn’t told me to close the door, I wouldn’t have.

“Come here.”

He was seated on a single sofa with his legs spread wide. I stopped at the side of where he sat, bowing my head carefully. He looked up at me seriously.

“Are you avoiding me using those meetings?”

My eyes widened slightly.

“No! I mean . . . no, sir. I don’t know when the meetings will be. I also didn’t expect Millie would come fetch me every day. They’re all free during your class time. So . . .”

I stopped. We just stared at each other. He was quiet for a few moments.

“Do you know why I didn’t show up after I kissed you?”

My heart pounded hard. When he mentioned that, it was like my heart only now remembered he had kissed me. Nervously, I swallowed and shook my head.

“Because I’m confused . . .”

He stared at me. I stared back.

“I think I like you . . .”

My jaw dropped. I didn’t know how to respond. I didn’t know whether to be happy or afraid. I was scared because . . . I think . . . I liked him too. And I didn’t know if he really meant it when he said he liked me.

“You don’t have to answer me now. I’ll wait.”

I stayed silent. He let me go when I said I was leaving, and told him I might have more meetings in the coming days.

That’s exactly what happened. The following week, I didn’t attend his class anymore so Millie wouldn’t have to excuse me again. Instead, Sir Lennox just called me to his office to give me copies of the lessons.

“I will finish the class early today,” he said. “Where is your meeting? I’ll drop by.”

I pouted. This past week, he had felt like he was courting me, even if he hadn’t said anything about it. I told him where before leaving his office. We hadn’t been in the meeting long when he actually dropped by and arrived.

“We’ll climb a mountain, sir.”

Millie answered because Sir Lennox leaned down to look at the laptop, where our destination was shown. After Millie’s reply, she faced our group again.

“Let’s just imagine that we are hiking on our way to our destination. That way, we’ll enjoy it and won’t get tired.”

“Which mountain again?”

Our leader pointed at the two mountains we found online. The laptop was placed in the middle of the table so we could all see.

“These mountains, sir. We saw them in a documentary. We’ll meet Aetas and Igorots there. Many Igorots already live well, but some are still deep in the mountains and struggling. They have no idea what the city looks like. Lacking food, no electricity. We’ve already gone to some mountains before, sir. This is the last. We saved it for last because it’s the hardest to climb and the farthest.”

While listening, Sir Lennox came behind me. He braced one hand on the table beside me, leaning closer to look at the mountain Millie pointed at. I cleared my throat and leaned forward a bit to put space between my back and his chest. None of my groupmates noticed my awkwardness since they were all focused on him and the plans.

“Okay . . .” He nodded like he was listening, though in truth his other hand was playing around.

I was sitting next to the wall with no one next to me on one side, so his free hand freely toyed with the ends of my hair. Behind me was just the window, this place is on a high floor so no one can see what he is doing. Every tug at my hair tickled my scalp. I cleared my throat softly and gathered my hair over my left shoulder to stop him.

I thought he would stop. But I was shocked when I felt his fingers brush the nape of my neck. I bit my lip hard. I raised my hand discreetly to hold his and stop him. Instead of stopping, he caught my hand. My hand was lifted, and I couldn’t pull away because he had clasped it with his hand. I sighed deeply and gave up, since I couldn’t get free. When he lowered it, he brought my hand down with his. We were holding hands behind me.

“Xena is the one I am assigned for food. Did you settle that?” Millie asked. I got nervous when my name was mentioned. I nodded.

“Yes. I budgeted it.”

“You’ll cook?”

I looked up at Sir Lennox. He leaned closer, his chest pressing against my back again. If anyone in the group noticed and read malice into his closeness, they’d surely figure out we were holding hands.

“You can cook?” he repeated.

He squeezed my hand. I blushed as I faced him at such a close distance. After he kissed me, this was the first time I faced him this near. Just inches apart.

“Stop doing that,” I whispered, scolding him, because his thumb was tracing little circles on my palm.

He didn’t listen. He turned to Millie.

“If your group is short on vehicles, I can lend my cars.”

I frowned at him for the suggestion. We had a lot to bring since for two straight days we were going to different places. We were short on cars and wondered where to find extras. He must’ve overheard us talking earlier.

“Woah!” Millie clapped. “Are you sure, sir? That’s far, and your cars might get scratched!”

“That’s not a problem. That’s fine.”

He and Millie talked. I looked down, my cheeks warming, because while he was talking to Millie, his thumb absentmindedly caressed the back of my hand. It was gentle and soft.

His caresses felt comforting and sweet. His rough hand against my smooth one. I chewed my lips when I remembered his rough kisses. I thought I had forgotten, but suddenly it all came back now that he was beside me. I remembered how he held me tightly and kissed me hungrily. It was like kissing me wasn’t enough—he wanted to devour me whole.

“How many cars do you need?”

Millie, our leader, thought for a moment and discussed with the others how many were still needed. While they were busy, he leaned down to me.

“Isn’t it dangerous for you to go there?” he whispered.

I glanced at the group, who were busy talking, before answering.

“Not really. I’ve joined before in other places.”

He nodded and stared at me. The way he looked at me was different now. I didn’t know what had changed, but I was sure something had in the way he looked and acted.

“Oh? That’s why your skin is a little tanned.” He glanced at one of my shoulders.

I pouted. “Is it ugly?”

He smirked. “Nope. It suits you.”

We stared at each other for a moment. I looked away. When I did, Millie caught my eyes. Her brows furrowed as she studied how close Sir Lennox and I were. She seemed to realize just then how pressed together our bodies were. The man was bent low behind me, his face near mine as he whispered. I panicked. Millie seemed to read my nervousness. Her lips parted, then slowly curved into a grin.

“Two cars should be enough, Sir Lennox!” Millie said.

“Sure. I can lend three cars to make sure. I’ll drive one.”

Our group, including me, turned to him. He would drive? If he drove, that meant he was coming along?

“You’re coming?” I couldn’t help asking.

He looked at me. “Don’t you want me to?”

My lips parted. “No . . . it’s not like I’m the one deciding that. It’s . . . Millie . . .”

He licked his lips before looking at Millie. “I’ll come along. Is that okay?”

Millie laughed. I sighed deeply, feeling like I was the one she laughed at.

“Of course, sir! Definitely okay!” She even chuckled and gave me a teasing look.