Coffee and Secrets

Anew

To say that life is an unexpected tragedy is an understatement; It’s an impenetrable catastrophe. At least that was what I thought when the letter from the lawyer came.

My dad had filed for divorce.

Though it’s something that I had predicted a long time ago and that I shouldn’t even be frustrated over such but to have had the nerve to actually have the lawyer send the papers on the first day of my mother’s wake? He’s as dumb as he looks.

Speaking of looks, I had always been proud of it since I resembled my dad more than my mom but ever since he cheated on her with the woman who he proclaimed as his first love, which is bullshit really, I am embarrassed of every likeness I had with that man and I am even ashamed of the fact that I was generated from his balls full of sperm.

A loud sigh escaped past my lips as I snatched the envelope full of papers from the stunned lawyer. “Th-these are for y-your mom…..” No s**t, I thought “…. If you don’t mind my asking, is she..?” I stared at his dumb stricken expression before handing him the papers back. “Yeah. Tell that man that he has no need for her signature since obviously, she couldn’t sign them anymore. All he has to do is declare he’s widowed. So if you please, just leave” I was about to close the door on him but I just had to say this s**t out “Oh and tell him that he’s a lying ass i***t and that he better not come here and show his f****d up face or I’ll make sure that he gets beat up to a pulp.  Thank you”

Once the door was closed, My Aunt May was the first one to approach me. “Was that your dad’s lawyer?” I gave her a dry chuckle and nodded “But auntie, he ain’t my dad anymore.” At that, I walked away and proceeded to take my place in front of my mom’s coffin.

Mom, this is such a hellish week when will it end?

“Are you sure about this, Yumi?” My aunt May’s worried voice made me gaze up from the intense packing I have drowned myself into.  She was also finishing up a box. “You know… you can always stay here with us” She said in a quiet voice almost as if she was crying. My aunt May is a very kind woman. She raised me like her own and even took care of me when my mom was busy taking many shifts at work. In return, I would help her with her flower shop and taking care of her twins. Her husband, Uncle Mark, was just as nice as well.  He was like the father figure I never had. He was funny and charming even though his dad jokes sometimes gets too lame for laughs.

“You know… we would prefer if you’d stay here with us” She was already crying at this point. I stared at her side profile, her face had aged drastically and wrinkles that weren’t there before had already surfaced. She was still mourning from the loss of her only sister, my mother and now, this. I warily reached a hand to brush back the strayed hair that was covering her face. “I’ll visit from time to time, Aunty. I’ll even call everyday if that doesn’t annoy you much but… I have to do this”

It was then that the picture frame, that displayed me and my mom, which was on top of the pile that she had neatly arranged was stained with tears that fell from her eyes “I’ll miss you, Yumi” I didn’t waste any moment and wrapped her in my arms, letting her bury her face on my neck. My eyes then drifted to three pairs of feet hiding behind my slightly ajar door. For the first time in months, I finally let my tears out.

There was not much exchange of words in the airport as the family saw me off however, it was undeniable that we all were holding back our tears. I bid them goodbye and quickened my pace towards the boarding area before looking back and smile at the people I once called home. I’ll miss them but I now have to live my life alone…..  in Seoul. 

Unlike my life back in my hometown, my first month in Seoul wasn’t so bad. I passed my scholarship exam for Seoul university (which I had to cram for as I had little time in my hands) which meant I can go to school without having to think about how to pay for my tuition. I was also able to snag a job at a café a few blocks away from my school and apartment. The apartment I was staying at was not that grandiose or big but enough for me and my needs. The rent was pretty cheap too considering that it was the closest to the school, it might be because the landlady is an old sweet woman who wanted more company in the building.

School will start in a week but my work requires me to start as early as possible and though I applied for part time, I volunteered to work full time while I still got time in my hands. The owner, who was a relatively jolly yet sometimes ill-tempered man named Key, was happy enough at my initiative of working more hours saying that he needed extra pair of hands due to the busy season. Though I insisted that he doesn’t need to pay me for the offered hours, he strongly argued with me stating “I say no to s*****y” which earned a subtle laughter from me due to his choice of words.

Despite the recent disastrous happenings in my life, I decided to be a better person and not be a depressive one – which surprised me, actually; I really did think I’d end up as a stoic and constantly sad human being. Not that I became the overly optimistic type as well but maybe I've just stayed as the neutral kind. I guess leaving the place I once called home was the saddest yet best decision I have ever made for my wellbeing.

“Hello, how may I help you?” I beamed at the costumer who had her eyes plastered on the menu above. “Um.. hi… uhh… I’d like…. A large Chocolate caramel frappe with extra whipped cream and two slices of cheesecake” The girl who, despite of the gloomy weather outside was wearing an oversized pair of sunglasses and an awful choice of wardrobe, smiled at me weakly as I patiently waited for her order.

Someone’s needing a sugar overdose.

“One large chocolate caramel frappe and two slices of cheesecake. Will that be all?” When I got a nod in response, I pried my eyes away from her and keyed in the amount on the register. Stating her bill and receiving payment, I told her that someone will serve it to her table and watch her slump down a booth by the window.

“I saw her boyfriend two days ago with another girl. Guess she’s going through a very depressing breakup” Leila, my coworker and admittedly a tattletale, managed to creep her way beside me as I prepare the female’s order. “And how do you know it was her boyfriend?” I raised a brow at her, briefly glancing at my coworker with an amused smile. “I saw her and that guy often. They like spending their afternoons here. Key can attest to that” and as if summoned by the devil, Key himself managed to occupy the vacant area beside me with a greeting “Hey guys, someone looks like she’s going through a rough breakup. What did she order?”

“A chocolate caramel frappe- LARGE. And two slices of cheesecake” Leila answered. Key grinned and patted my shoulder “Her boyfriend must’ve cheated” I rolled my eyes at their assumption and shake my head. As soon as I finished my work, I handed it to Shun for him to serve it to the lady.

“So hey, we’re going to a club tonight and I will not take no for an answer from you today” Key stated.

“No rejection from you today” Leila seconded. Even Max, our barista who just returned from his bathroom break, intervened. “Yeah, no ‘I have to go home early to wash my dog’ when you don’t even have a dog” he stated rather sassily for my liking.

“How did you even know I have no dog?” I narrowed my eyes at the male who had fussed himself with the coffee maker and crossed my arms over my chest.

“I stalked you one time” Leila, without a hint of shame, admitted. “Oh how creepy” I whipped my head towards her and retorted sarcastically, not even surprised about the revelation. Leila can come up with extremely weird measures to gather information- something that’s both admirable and worrisome.  “I’ll stalk you anytime and even crash at your house if you keep rejecting a night out or any get together with us, woman” She said it with determination and I automatically narrowed my eyes at her. “Don’t look at me like that. You know I love you even when you keep rejecting us.”

Leila is a dear precious friend that I am thankful to have gained upon moving here in Seoul. She along with Key, Max, Shun and Jeremy have always made an effort to include me in their fun affairs, they’ve never made me feel unwelcome and that help made my settling in much easier than what I had imagined. I am forever grateful for them.

But their insistence on making me hang out at clubs is already making my frown turn deeper.

Not because I don’t want to be with them nor do I despise the nightlife but somehow, I get the feeling that they have a hidden agenda in mind. What is it? I have honestly no idea.

It was very much obvious from the grin this bunch were throwing at me and the high five Key and Max exchanged when I resigned to nod my head, agreeing to the said night out with a regretful heart and a mountain of prayers that I make it out alive.