He Will Be Mine (New Horizon Book 1)

Sharing Secrets Part II: Aly

Friday night, movie night with the dormies gets cancelled and Ronnie wants to use the opportunity to do more studying for finals, so I end up spending the night at the guys’ apartment. Though Tyler and I have settled back into our “kind of together” couple vibe, I’ve been careful not to let it get too intimate because I know Matt is dealing with a lot and doesn’t need mate-bond gut pain on top of it.

I know what it’s like to be on the receiving end of it, and though it seems mild for him compared to how much it hurts me when he and Jessica have s*x, I still don’t feel right about it. He’s ignorant of how his actions affect me, but I would be knowingly hurting him, and I just can’t stomach the thought of it anymore.

Not that Tyler and I have had much alone time anyway. Ever since we let Matt sleep with us last weekend, he has been tagging along more this week. He joined us for both Tuesday’s and Thursday’s workouts, and we took him with us to dinner Wednesday night. Tyler still seems cool with it, and Matt seems to appreciate the time we spend together. I think it’s even helping the two of them get closer because it seems like they haven’t hung out without Trevor much over the years and now they get to experience a whole new dynamic of their relationship.

Which is why it doesn’t surprise me when Matt creeps into Tyler’s bedroom a little while after we turn in for the night and climbs in next to me in the bed. Tyler is already snoring softly on the other side of me, and I am not quite asleep yet but not fully awake either. I feel him scoot in behind me, my back to his front, and gently drape an arm over me. I turn my head just enough to see his shadowy face barely illuminated by the moonlight and he leans over to kiss my cheek.

“Can’t sleep,” he whispers as an explanation. “Is it okay to be here?”

“Sure,” I reply groggily, nestling my body into his and closing my eyes again.

It must not take me long to fall asleep after that because I don’t remember anything until I wake up the next morning to the sensation of something grabbing my foot. I open my eyes and look down at the end of the bed to see Trevor, all dressed and ready for the day.

“I’m hungry,” he whispers. “Get dressed and let’s go.”

He’s not afraid to be demanding when he knows I need him. Somehow, I’m not surprised by this discovery. He also doesn’t seem to react to the fact that we’re all in bed together. That does surprise me.

Matt and Tyler are still sound asleep, so I carefully wiggle out from under both of their holds on me and end up slithering down the bed. Once I’m at the foot of the bed I sit up and turn around to make sure I didn’t disturb them, only to find that they’re now basically cuddling each other. It’s too cute, and I’m tempted to take a photo. It’s probably a good thing Trevor left as soon as he was certain I was awake, though, because he probably would never let them live that down.

After a quick shower and change of clothes, I meet Trevor down in the parking lot. He’s waiting by my car, so I assume he wants me to drive us to the diner.

“You’re an early riser on this frigid Saturday morning,” I comment as I unlock the doors.

“I’ll sleep when I’m forty,” he retorts with a smirk, letting himself in the passenger side.

“And a walking cliché apparently,” I add after we’re both in the car. “So, never went to bed last night I take it?”

“Nope, but I did finish two final papers and prep for a presentation I have to give Monday.”

I make a sound of approval as I turn the keys in the ignition and my car’s engine roars to life. Trevor starts tapping his hands on his lap like he’s pretending to play drums. He seems a bit riled up. I’m wondering how many coffees or energy drinks it took to keep him up all night, or if it’s just that being alone with me makes him nervous. Actually, now that I think of it, he’s always a bit amped up. It’s just easier to overlook when I’m more focused on Tyler or Matt.

“It’s pretty cool that you and Tyler have been inviting Matt to do stuff with you,” he says after a few moments of quiet. “He seems so lost without Jess, but he’s adamant that he’s not ready to talk to her yet. Mer says she’s getting antsy, though, so he probably better get around to it soon.”

“I agree that he needs to sort out what he wants, but in the meantime, it’s nice spending time with him. It’s really not possible when Jess is around.”

In my peripheral vision, I notice him look over at me and seem to study me for a moment before hitting me with a flood of commentary and questions.

“Can I have a hint about what we need to talk about? I assume it’s about this whole situation. Do you have any comment on where you stand, like are you actually even interested in Matt since you’re already with Tyler? And if so, what’s your exit strategy there? The way I see it, no matter which way it goes, I’m going to have a devastated roommate on my hands. Well, unless Matt decides to get back with Jess, I suppose. I don’t think he actually wants that, though, which is why I’m glad you came to me because I have kind of been wondering about your side of things this whole time.”

Yeah, he is exactly like the male version of Ronnie, right down to the rambling and bundled questions on a topic. I try to hold back how amused I am by him. I don’t want him to think I’m laughing at him or not taking this seriously.

“Well, what I need to talk to you about is related, but it’s actually a whole issue in itself,” I start to explain. “Basically, there’s something I need to tell Matt, and I’ve been too chicken to do it. I was thinking that since you’re his best friend, if I run it by you first, then maybe you can clue me in about how you see it going when I tell him. As for the rest, to be honest, I haven’t figured it all out, either.”

“Oh, I see,” he says distractedly, seeming to be lost in thought already.

We don’t get a chance to talk about it more because I see the diner ahead on the right and pull into the parking area in front of it. We both get out and walk together to the front door, and he surprises me by holding the door for me. I smile and thank him, to which he just shrugs.

We slide into opposite sides of a booth toward the back. It’s fairly private, but I still don’t feel comfortable talking about anything werewolf-related here. He orders what seems to be his favorite breakfast, waffles with assorted berries and cream over them, and I order a breakfast meat platter, pancakes, and four fried eggs. He gives me an amused look after we fold up our menus and hand them back to the waitress.

“I like that you don’t try to impress people or act like anyone but yourself,” he comments approvingly. “I remember on my first real date with Meredith, she ordered a salad and a water. Which was weird, because we had been going out since we were twelve, but we had never had a real meal together before other than cafeteria food at school, so I guess she felt weird ordering what she actually wanted for dinner in front of me.”

“Or maybe she was worried about the bill,” I point out. “Maybe it was to be considerate, not to impress you.”

“Yeah, but the salad was more expensive than a burger or something more her style.”

“You’ve got me there,” I concede with a chuckle.

“Just take the compliment, Aly. You ordered enough food for a small army like you just don’t care, and I appreciate that. Especially since I’m not paying.”

He laughs and I smile back at him. I enjoy his company, which is not surprising. He’s odd but I’ve always liked him.

We keep the conversation light as we each devour our breakfasts. He finishes first and reaches over to steal a couple sausage links from me. It’s a sign that he’s feeling more comfortable around me, and considering that we’re having this whole bonding moment, I have to fight Mari back to keep her from ruining it when she wants to growl at him for daring to take an Alpha’s food without permission. It makes sense, but also surprises me. She never does that to Tyler, and he steals food from my plate all the time.

After I pay the bill and we head back out to my car, I realize I have no idea where to take him now. My go-to private place is always the nature park, but it feels wrong to go there with someone other than Matt. I start up the car and sit there tapping the steering wheel, thinking of an alternative.

“I know a place that should be deserted right now,” Trevor says.

He sounds a little excited about it. I’d be more worried about that, but even the microwave excites this kid, so I figure that whatever he has in mind is probably harmless.

“Direct me where to go,” I tell him as I back the car out of the parking spot.

His idea turns out to be the physics lab. He explains to me that since everyone should have finished their projects this past week, there shouldn’t be anyone in there. I wonder for a moment if that means that the building or the lab will be locked, which turns out to be true but somehow, he has keys. I have a suspicion that if I ask him about that, he’ll get lost on a tangent explaining it to me and we won’t get around to talking about what I need to discuss with him, so I decide not to even bother asking.

“You can look around in here but don’t touch anything,” he instructs as he lets us into the lab where he has been spending the majority of his free time lately. “Pull up one of those stools and we can sit over here,” he points out a tall workstation that looks unused. It reminds me of the lab tables in the biology lab, which makes sense considering that they’re in the same building.

I do as he says and allow myself a quick glance around the room. What I notice is a lot of tall structures, some tanks of water with colorful objects floating in them, and a construction of some sort that reminds me of building sets I used to play with as a child. It all looks pretty cool but is not why we’re here.

“So, what’s up, Aly? What’s the big secret?” he asks me, bringing my attention back to him.

“Okay, so, I need you to listen with an open-mind, and just know that I’m not pranking you, it’s not a joke, and I am very serious about what it is I have to say. It’s an important and very private personal revelation I’m about to make. Oh, and I promise I am not crazy.”

“Okay,” he agrees with a nervous chuckle.

I take a deep breath and look him in the eyes as I tell him, “I’m a werewolf, Trevor.”

I hear him suck in a sharp breath and see his eyes widen, but I press forward with my explanation.

“I don’t know any other way to say it because I don’t know your personal experiences with or orientation toward the supernatural, but there it is. I can shift forms and turn into a big black wolf, and that’s why everything back at my home is so private and closed off. We can’t let outsiders we can’t trust know about us because it never ends well when the wrong people find out.”

Trevor just sits and looks at me for a few moments. I think it’s the first time I have ever seen him sit still. He seems to be processing what I said, and I’m not detecting any hints of fear or anger, so I wait patiently and let him do it. I need him to get past the idea that I’m a werewolf so he can pay attention to the rest of what I have to say.

“Does Tyler know?” he eventually asks.

Okay, good. He doesn’t seem to be stuck in disbelief. He probably wonders about Tyler because we’re close and he has been to my house, which works in my favor here. He knows all he has to do to verify what I’m saying is ask Tyler.

“He does. I told him the day we went on a break from each other, but it wasn’t learning that I’m a werewolf that upset him.”

“Yeah, it seems like something he would be pretty excited about, actually.”

I chuckle, appreciating that Trevor knows him that well.

“He is pretty geeked about it, especially after visiting my pack over break," I confirm. "He seemed to be having the time of his life.”

“So, what upset him then?”

I sigh, trying to decide how to explain it to him. “How familiar are you with the concept of mates?”

“In regard to normal wolves, or like, your kind of wolves?”

I laugh, realizing that he probably isn’t all that interested in all the fiction and lore out there about supernatural creatures.

“My kind of wolves. It’s different, trust me,” I assure him.

“I figured. In that case, I have no idea. I know that mating is generally for the purposes of protection and reproduction in the wild,” he states matter-of-factly. He seems to be processing everything I tell him from a viewpoint of intellectual curiosity, and I’m not able to read his emotional reaction to it at all.

“Those are important for us, too, but it’s so much more than that. Werewolves are supernatural creatures, and our mating is supernatural, too. I won’t bore you with specifics and lore, or get too in depth about our culture, but in short, each werewolf is paired with a specific mate, or soulmate, at birth and the task is for each mate pair to find each other. Once they do, their bond pulls them together and couples them for life. Usually, two werewolves are paired together, but occasionally, rarely, a werewolf is given a different sort of mate. In my case, he’s human.”

“And Tyler was upset because it’s not him,” Trevor realizes, nodding his head.

“Yeah. He felt pretty defeated learning that he’s basically competing with this powerful supernatural force that just won’t let me give up on my mate even though I have feelings for him, too.”

“Matt’s your mate, isn’t he,” he continues to piece things together on his own.

I nod, and for some reason I feel tears starting to form behind my eyes. I think I feel nervous about what Trevor is going to tell me about how Matt might feel about this all, and maybe a little bit relieved at how easy it has been to talk to Trevor so far.

He sounds genuinely intrigued and maybe even a little bit excited as he asks, “Can he like, feel it or sense that he’s your mate? The whole bond thing or whatever, does it work on him too?”

“It’s not as strong for humans, but to an extent, yes,” I begin to explain. “He’ll feel the pull, and in his case, it seems to take the form of him feeling attracted and drawn to me. He also seems to feel the pleasant sensations of being close to me or touching me, which is why he wants to lie down with me to sleep when he’s feeling restless. Just that small bit of contact with me soothes him.”

“That’s what I was wondering. It’s all starting to make sense now.” He drums his fingers on the table, seeming to consider it more. “So, why don’t you just tell him? I’m confused why you needed to tell me first.”

“Because there’s a loophole to this whole permanent mate bond thing. Both mates have to accept it, and they also have the option to reject it. He can reject me, and then that bond will be ripped away from me. Problem is, since he is human, first I have to tell him what I am, and then I have to explain what we are to each other. I don’t know how he’ll take the news, and if he gets upset and decides in a fleeting moment of emotion that he doesn’t want me, then it could act as a rejection and destroy everything.”

“What if he does accept you? Are you going to just abandon what you have with Tyler and go off and live happily ever after in the woods with Matt?”

I exhale forcefully and lean my head on my arms on the table.

“I don’t know," I reluctantly admit. "When I first asked to go camping with you guys, I wanted Matt. Just Matt. I wanted to just be friends with Tyler and the rest of you guys and get close enough to Matt that he would feel what we have, or rather what we could have. But Tyler charmed the pants off me -"

“Literally,” he cuts in wryly.

I roll my eyes, fighting the urge to laugh. I don’t want to reward him for that.

“Okay, smart ass. Anyway, I pretty quickly started falling for him, and now I feel ripped in two. Tyler has been amazing to me, and I was ready to just pick him and move on, but I’m finally getting a chance to get close to Matt, and he’s incredible. Plus, I know he so badly wants a happily ever after, and that’s what our mate bond would give us.”

“That’s an intense dilemma, Aly, and I really can’t help you out with it,” Trevor says, blowing out a breath and letting it vibrate his lips as he thinks. “You really can’t go wrong with either one, but I guess I’m a little biased if I’m being honest because I think I’m rooting for Matt. It’s not my place, though, and whatever happens, I won’t hold it against you.”

I smile, fighting the urge to hug him, too.

“I appreciate that so much, Trevor. Thank you,” I tell him instead, and then add, “It does help some.”

“You’re welcome. Now, obviously I’m not Matt, but I think if you can somehow tell him in a way that highlights the part where he can have his dream girl for life, he’ll be on board. But here’s the thing, though: Don’t bother unless you actually intend to give him that. If he finds out that he could have had everything if he had just waited for you, it will break him if you move on without him. Like permanently broken, unfixable, lose the will to live level of break him.”

“Yikes. Definitely don’t want that.”

“Yeah, exactly. So, please, please figure it out. The sooner, the better, because if he knew what you’re offering then I think he would break up with Jess in a heartbeat and pick you up and sprint to the chapel or whatever it is he needs to do to accept being your mate. And if you wait too long, he’ll end up back with Jess because he doesn’t think he stands a chance with you and loathes the idea of being alone and having to tell his family he’s not getting married after all. He’ll push through that if he has you, but I don’t think he will want to if he doesn’t.”

I sigh and put my head down on the table, the weight of it all hitting me again.

“Sorry, I know that probably isn’t super helpful,” he apologizes sheepishly.

“No, it is. I think you’re right, and I appreciate your insight. Oddly enough, now I’m not as worried about him rejecting me as I am about what he’ll do if I reject him.”

“Same, dude. Same,” Trevor says, drawing out the vowel sound of the last word. “I mean I get that it would suck for you to be rejected and all, but at least you have Tyler.”

I can’t argue with that. I decide that he’s right, and I need to have a talk with Tyler again and try to figure out what I want before my window of opportunity closes with Matt.

With my confession out of the way and no reason for us to stay longer, I suggest that we head back to their place so Tyler and I can get our workout in, and Trevor and Matt can go see their movie. I also remember Trevor mentioning that there is a big end of semester party to kick off finals week tonight, and hope that later Tyler and Matt will want to go to that. I want to squeeze in whatever fun times I can with them before the semester ends and we all go our separate ways for the better part of a month. Besides, I think we could all use the distraction.