He Will Be Mine (New Horizon Book 1)

The Morning After: Aly

Saturday morning, I wake up snuggled up next to Tyler. He is snoring softly, and though the sound and his appearance are rather pleasant, I can't shake off this deep-seated feeling of wrongness. Everything feels wrong, not how it's supposed to be. I'm supposed to wake up next to Matt. He is so near I can smell him. I can also smell ... them, and that brings back the memory of the agonizing, gut-wrenching pain from the night before.

I knew it would be unpleasant, attaching myself to his group of friends and having to endure a front seat to his relationship with another woman, but nothing prepared me for what it would feel like when they "did the deed" while I was powerless to do anything about it. Because our bond is already developing, his infidelity is painful for me, not just mentally but physically. Especially physically.

I call it infidelity because in my mind ours is the only union that matters, but of course to him it's just par for the course when you're engaged to someone. For me, it's a feeling like my insides are being ripped apart and my heart is shattering into pieces. I knew it was going to get ugly when I started to hear the moans and grunts coming from their tent, so I decided to excuse myself to use the bathroom. What I didn't anticipate was that it would wreck me even when I couldn't see or hear what was going on. I felt it in every part of me, and it was all I could do to hold in the sobs and just breathe through the pain, sitting there alone in an outdoor stall and feeling like I was dying.

After the pain started to subside and it didn't hurt as badly to breathe, I made a mad dash for the showers. It didn't matter that I didn't bring any soap or clean clothes to change into, I just needed to stand under the warm water and let my tears flow freely. I think what hurts the most, though, is the knowledge that I have saved myself for this man, but because he is human, he never knew any better. He had no idea I was out there waiting just for him, and I don't even have any right to be mad about it. Suddenly, I'm rethinking my purity, and suddenly, I'm wondering if it wouldn't be so bad to misbehave a bit.

After all, Tyler seems completely smitten with me. I give him a lot of credit because so far, he has been a perfect gentleman, other than the occasional innuendos and dirty comments. I can tell that deep down he is a good guy, and he respects me as a person to the point that he isn't going to pressure me into anything just because I agreed to share a tent and a mattress with him. He seemed excited just to cuddle with me, and since I didn't bring my own bedding there wasn't really another option. He assumes I did that on purpose because I like him too, and you know what? I kind of do. He'll never be Matt, but he might just be my ticket to ensuring that a repeat of last night doesn't happen again.

Mari is, of course, not at all happy with my plan. She wants Matt and only Matt, and her plan is for me to go to him now and just tell him the truth. She claims our bond will force him to do the right thing. But Mari is naïve. Maybe my plan isn't the best, but it's better than hers. Screw her for accusing me of being petty and vindictive. She claims I just want him to feel the pain I felt. It's more like I just want to feel the pleasure he feels, and if I have to endure a whole year of this, a little pleasure here and there might be the only thing helping me through it.

I'm still lost in my thoughts when Tyler finally stirs beside me and flips around to lie face-to-face with me.

"Morning," he murmurs with a sleepy smile.

He tentatively reaches out to me to drape an arm over my hip, seeming almost shy for the first time since I've known him. Though his previous attempts at this sort of affection have been met with hesitation on my end, this time I decide to reward his effort. I scoot closer and wind my own arm around him, bringing our faces mere inches apart.

"Morning," I return cheerfully with a hint of flirtation in my tone and expression.

He grins and leans in to kiss my forehead before resting his chin against the top of my head.

"You always smell so good," he compliments me.

"Thanks," I tell him. "I like how you smell too," I lie, or more like exaggerate the truth. It's not that he smells bad, but he does smell like a lot of strong, artificial nonsense that my nose isn't sure what to do with.

"Did you bring a swimsuit?" he asks me, seemingly out of the blue.

"I brought two, actually. Why?"

"I was thinking of heading down to the lake after breakfast and was wondering if you would want to join me." He pulls away from me just far enough to look at my face and gauge my reaction.

"I'd love to." And I really would. I love swimming, and maybe this early in the morning it won't be terribly crowded at the lake.

I smile up at him, leaning forward to kiss his cheek. His face lights up at that, and I can tell it really wouldn't be that hard to seduce him if I decide to go through with that later. I push that aside for now, though, rolling out of bed to dress and prepare for the day.

Considering Tyler's plans, I layer my outfit for today with my bikini underneath, short jean shorts and a blue halter top over that. Though Tyler is considerate enough to turn around and focus on his own dressing while I am changing, I can tell when he turns back to me that he approves of my choices. He grins and ogles me for a moment, and then we unzip the front of the tent and step out. He goes after me so he can check out my ass, of course.

Breakfast consists of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I muse to myself that I could just spend a half hour or so alone in the woods and bring back a real breakfast for us all. I wonder what these guys would think if I just showed up with some rabbit or maybe some fish and set about preparing them to cook over the fire. Somehow, I suspect Tyler would be into it, though maybe I'm just getting cocky about how much he seems to like me. I can only hope that Matt would appreciate it because if all goes according to plan, someday that will be his life.

"What are you smirking about over there?" Matt cuts into my thoughts, and I realize he is talking to me.

We're all sitting around or near the firepit, though currently no fire is lit. This is just how we left the folding camp chairs last night. He must have noticed me over here lost in my thoughts about breakfast.

I clear my throat and shake my thoughts away, preparing to respond to him.

"Uh, nothing really. I was just thinking about the last time I went camping with my uncle. It wasn't like this. He's a hardcore outdoorsman. We caught our breakfast fresh, so I was just thinking how nice it is to just relax and have a sandwich."

"Fresh, as in alive?" Meredith asks as she wrinkles her nose, the thought obviously not sitting well with her. Well, there's my answer.

I chuckle and nod my head. "Yes, as in alive, still scampering around the woods or swimming in the lake until we came along. We always pack light and eat fresh. It's easier on our backs because there's less to carry, and better overall because we aren't wasting anything. It all gets eaten and used."

Matt smiles and seems pleased by my response, and Tyler seems outright impressed.

"That's so cool," Tyler enthuses. "I wish I had skills like that. I don't even know how to build a fire, but I grew up in an apartment in the city, so I've never really had a whole lot of this." He gestures around and I assume he means nature or woods or maybe even opportunities to do activities outdoors.

I decide to use this opportunity to segue into probing for more details about Matt's life.

"You know, speaking of, I don't actually know much about you guys, like where you're from and all that."

"Well, I'm from New York," Tyler offers, seeming pleased at my interest. "And those guys are from the Midwest, you know, like farm country and all that." He's pointing to Matt and Trevor and I would assume Meredith, since they all grew up together. "I have no idea where Jess is from."

"I'm not all that comfortable sharing that information with a stranger," she says tensely.

I still find it odd that she doesn't seem to like me much, but honestly, I couldn't care less where she is from. All I care about is Matt.

"We're from W-" Matt starts to tell me, but she silences him with a look. He looks back at me uncomfortably and scratches the back of his neck. "I mean, uh, maybe she's right and it's not the best idea since we don't really know you."

"Alright, well, that doesn't seem fair since we all know exactly where she lives," Meredith argues, "but I don't want to tell you anything that will make anyone uncomfortable. I will tell you that we go to school together. All of us. Same school. And I'm sure Tyler will have no issue telling you which school he goes to later."

Jessica glares at her too, but Meredith just looks back at her with a glint of humor and mischief in her eyes. She is fun, and I like her. Not sure what Jessica's problem is, but I'm fine with it. I don't like her about as much as she doesn't seem to like me. Besides, Meredith is right. Tyler is comfortable with me and has so far been forthcoming, so I'm sure he will tell me all I need to know. So, I drop it, and brush it off like it's no big deal.

I stand from my chair and turn to Tyler, holding out my hand. "How about that swim? And maybe a shower after?" I ask him invitingly.

His eyes look like they're about to bulge out of his head as he registers what I just said to him. He quickly recovers and grins from ear to ear and then stands up to take my hand.

"You're on!" he agrees enthusiastically.

I shoot my mate a quick glance as we pass by him, glad to see he looks a little agitated. Guys who ignore the super b***h and open up to me get rewarded, Matt. It's high time you figure that out.