None of that mattered now. Ellen had no illusions about what might happen if she continued not going to church, if she followed her own mind and stayed to herself. She’d lose the community, plain and simple. She might lose Micheline too. Right now she didn’t mind the idea of living alone in her cabin, unfettered by others’ words and needs, but she wouldn’t even be here if other people hadn’t helped her parents during their flight north. Attending the church could be a charitable act. She didn’t have to believe what they did. She could use the hours on her knees at Benjamin McCloud’s service to think about what she did believe. One day she might tell someone else about her second faith and it would make sense. She’d whispered the story to William in the dark the night she’d arrived. He said
