The Monster Machine

The Choice

Tova kept glancing at the door every now and then before turning back to the book and continuing her reading. She's not the best at reading big words, but she can understand enough to make sense of what the paragraphs were talking about. She flipped to one page that described what the earth used to look like before humans took over the land.

It was apparently ruled by many creatures and many different types of plants that used to live everywhere. And then, during the years that humans became the dominant species, they built great cities and inventions that helped modernize their lives to make living easier. Tova didn't exactly understand it all, but she understood that those days on the surface must've been really great for them. But then she started reading the part about how they were causing their own extinction. Many of the things they were doing worked for them to make living easier, but it had its own backlash. It was destroying their environment. And they were destroying themselves along with it.

War, famine, rising global temperatures, and insufficient resources were tearing them apart. This is what confused Tova the most. If they knew that they were doing all this bad stuff to the earth, wouldn't they have done something to stop it? And if they were, did it not work? Were they really trying to fix everything? What if they didn't? Did they think their problems would solve themselves? Did they not care? Did they really not know what they were doing? Tova thought about this for a long time. There were more words than pictures, so it was difficult for her to understand everything.

She broke away from her daze and went back to reading and flipped to another page that showed many pictures of paintings, while the other page had the descriptions of each of them as well as the name of the artist. She didn't pay much attention to the descriptions and looked at the paintings instead. Most of them were landscapes. Tova looked at the first one near the top left corner. Birch trees that cast shadows on the bright green grass from the brightly painted sun. The painting below it had large buildings that were almost as bright as the painted night sky. Each of the landscapes depicted their own style and Tova liked them all. The longer she looked at them, the more she began to imagine what the world used to be like. She also began to imagine what the world looked like now. She wondered, she imagined, and she thought for a long time.

She didn't sit and stare at nothing in particular, waiting for something to happen or for her to be needed. Instead, she sat and thought about things. Things that hadn't been thought of before. And soon, her curiosity began to grow.

She didn't realize it, but she wanted to know more. She closed the book after a while of staring and thinking and put it back in the box before shoving it back under the broken desk. Tova looked up at the door and stared at it for a moment. She stood up quietly and approached it, reaching out for the handle. She shook it quietly, surprised to feel that it wasn't locked. She opened the door as quietly as possible and peaked through the c***k. She didn't hear or see anyone approaching. She stepped into the hallway and closed the door behind her. She looked around one last time before quietly making her way down the hall. With the sounds of far-off heavy machinery and the low hum of electricity moving through the wires, Tova doubted that her quiet footsteps were that easy to hear. She glanced behind her as she moved down the hallway, not looking at where she was going and accidentally bumping into someone. She gasped in fright and immediately covered her mouth to keep herself from making anymore noise.

"Oh, Tova, I'm sorry! I didn't see you there. Wait, what are you doing out of your room?"

Tova sighed a breath of relief at the sight of the friendly woman.

"I'm sorry, I was just... um... I was just looking for you, actually."

"What? Why? If your father catches you out here..."

"I just... wanted to know more The book you showed me. Could you show me more?" Tova asked. The woman stared at her face and sighed.

"You really want to do this now?" she asked. Tova averted her gaze.

"Yeah. I mean... if it's okay. I don't want to bother you if..."

"No, no. It's... it's alright. Your father is working in his study again. We can take advantage of this time, but we have to be quick. Do you still have the box?"

Tova nodded.

"Alright. Go get it, and meet me downstairs."

Tova went ahead back to her room to reveal the box and took it downstairs where the woman was waiting patiently for her.

"Is everything still there?"

"Yes, I think so." Tova confirmed.

"Okay, good. I think it'd be best if we take this somewhere else to look at it. I don't want your father to catch us."

Tova thought for a moment. She looked towards the front door and looked at it nervously.

"I think I have an idea. But... we'd have to go outside."

The two of them both stepped out onto the dimly lit street and Tova motioned to the woman to follow her. She felt nervous to go out without specifically being instructed to. This time she was the one leading the way. As they walked down the street, an unidentified man in a big coat rushed past them, seemingly in a hurry but they paid no attention to him. Tova led them to the old building where she and her father secretly worked and opened the door for the woman. She hesitated stepping inside, but Tova assured her that no one would bother them here.

"Tova, what is this?" the woman asked.

"This is the place where my father works. He takes me here sometimes when he needs my help."

"This... doesn't really look like a good place to work."

"Oh, he doesn't work up there. There's a bigger room downstairs where he keeps all the machines. He says this building is something called a... a 'front." Tova tried to explain.

"Ah..., that makes more sense. Is there a light we can switch on in here, I can't see anything."

"Sorry, hold on."

Tova felt around the walls for the correct light switch and the light took a minute to flicker on. The room was in it's usual state of disarray and filth. The woman was surprised to know that this place was so close to where they lived.

The woman stood near Tova as she brushed off some small pieces of trash off of a table in the middle of the room and set the box down. She opened the box and took the little book out. Tova flipped to the pages with the landscape paintings.

"What are these? I was looking at these earlier, but I don't understand what they are."

"Oh, those are paintings. Some people liked to paint things to help express their inner thoughts and feelings. Others just liked to capture the beauty of nature. You don't see those anymore."

"Are there more paintings like these?" Tova asked.

"Well, there used to be... But I don't think people paint things anymore. I haven't seen any of those in a long time."

"Is there anything else about the earth in here?"

The woman paused for a moment before taking the book, thumbing through the pages before stopping near the end. There were illustrations of large cranes and tall buildings that rose high into the cloudy, gray sky.

"Here. When humans needed more space to live, they destroyed whatever was living on top and shaped it the way they wanted rather than use it the way it was. They cut down trees and uprooted the plants in the ground, which was very bad for the environment and for all the animals that lived there." the woman explained. She pointed to the other page with the continued illustration of a group of deer running away from their woodland home as the people in the background carried saws and explosives and were pouring concrete into the ground.

Tova felt sad just looking at it. She never knew how much life was affected by this. And she bet the humans from the past didn't realize it either. Or maybe they only realized it when it was too late.

"If they knew it was bad, why didn't they stop?" Tova asked.

"I don't know, dear. Some say they didn't have a choice. Others say it was already too late from the beginning. There was nothing they could do to reverse the process."

The woman shut the book and put it away, looking through the other contents of the box. She pulled out a photograph. There was a family standing in front of some old stone wall, smiling together.

"What's that?" Tova asked.

"It's a picture. It's not mine though. I found it on the ground one day while I was walking. I don't know any of these people or where that place is. Whoever this belonged to, they must've lost it and forgot about it."

Tova thought it looked like a nice photo, the people in it looked really happy. The woman put the photo back and pulled out a small scrap of crumpled paper with faded writing on it. She almost tossed it aside, thinking it was trash. But she unfolded it first to see if there was anything on it. Tova looked over her shoulder and tried to read it for herself, but the writing was very... squiggly. She had a hard time trying to see the letters.

"What's this say?"

"I think it's a poem. There used to be a lot of these, like the paintings, but no one does this kind of work anymore. It's a little hard to see, but I can read it for you."

Darkness cannot be seen without Light.

Light cannot shine without Darkness.

The life that thrives in the in-between,

Will Live and Die and Live again.

However the amount,

Even nothing is something that is happening.

Tova didn't understand what it all meant, but it sounded pretty. The woman couldn't really explain it very well either, but at least Tova was interested to know what it could've meant.

"Is that all that's in there?" Tova asked.

The woman sighed, putting the scrap of paper back in the box and closing the lid.

"I think that's enough for today. Let's go back before your father notices we're gone."

"But what about all that other stuff?"

"...I'm sure we'll find time to look at everything later. It's mostly stuff I've collected over the years. Your father doesn't like it when I talk about the past, but I thought you deserved to know. So much of our history is lost and I can't bear to see it all be forgotten."

"Do you know what exactly happened that made the Earth so bad that we had to live underground?"

"Honestly.. I don't know. I was born way after it had all happened. All I know is no one talks about it anymore, even the first survivors refuse to speak about it." the woman explained. She paused and looked towards the door.

"C'mon, let's start heading back."

"Wait."

Tova picked up the box and looked around for a good place to hide it. She found a small hole behind a few broken roof tiles.

"We can keep it here so no one will find it."

The woman smiled, "That's a good idea. I doubt anyone would want to poke around this old place."

They made their way back home, relieved to get back to... relative safety. The woman led Tova back to her room, until she suddenly grabbed her arm.

"Wait, when can we go back to look at it?" Tova asked.

"To look at what?"

"The rest of the stuff in the box."

"Why do you want to go back so soon?"

"I want to see everything that's in there. There was still more we didn't get to look at."

The woman paused, staring at Tova's face for a long time before kneeling down and taking her hand.

"Tova, I'm sorry... but I won't be coming back."

"What? Why?"

"...Your father dismissed me, which means that you won't need me anymore. I'm not allowed to come back here anymore, so this'll be the last time I'll see you. But I promise you everything will be just fine. You don't have to worry about me, I'll be just fine." she smiled warmly, but there was a hint of sadness in her voice. She nudged Tova back inside her room and closed the door. Tova heard her walking away until everything returned to silence. Tova hadn't felt this feeling in a long time, and she couldn't recall when she had ever felt like this before. She backed away from the door and sat near her filthy bed. She started drifting into space again and soon found herself resting against her lumpy pillow, beginning to doze.

A while later, Tova flinched at the sound of footsteps coming closer to her door and she immediately sat up. They stopped at the door and Tova saw a piece of paper slip underneath the doorframe. She heard the footsteps walk away and waited until it was quiet again. She stared at the door, moving slowly towards the piece of paper until she picked it up. It was a note, written in neat handwriting. Tova read it quietly to herself.

Tova, I apologize for being so vague, but there isn't anything else I can do for you anymore. I'm not allowed to come back here anymore, but there's something I need to tell you. It isn't safe for you here anymore. But I can't let your father see me or we'll both be in trouble. You need to get out of here quickly. I have a friend that can help you and keep you safe. But you have to go alone. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you sooner, but you need to believe me. Your father is not who he appears to be, so you need to get out before it's too late. Don't let him catch you. I promise everything will be explained later. There's a picture on the back of this note. Find this place and my friend will meet you there. She'll keep you safe. But please be careful. I wish you the best of luck Tova.

My heart goes out to you.

~Maria

Tova flipped over the paper to find a photograph on the back. It was a little crude, but she was able to make out the details. She noticed a large building in the center that she didn't recognize, but it was very distinct.

Tova realized that she never once asked for her name. This woman that she had known for so long. Who took care of her. She wished she had asked for her name sooner. She wished she couldn't gotten to know her more.

Tova's mind became flooded with more thoughts. She began to wonder why this place was no longer safe for her. Who was this friend that Maria was talking about? Why did her father not allow her to come back?

Her thoughts became interrupted when she heard footsteps loudly approaching her door and she quickly shoved the note under the torn blanket, before sitting down on the floor just as her father opened the door and set down a small plate of food in front of her.

"Eat. Then hurry and get ready. Meet me in my office when you're finished. I have a few more tests to run, okay?"

He didn't wait for Tova's response and closed the door before walking away. Tova looked at the scraps of food, instead turning around and pulling the note back out. She read it over and over, trying to process everything. She looked up at the door, at the food, at the note. She repeated this process for a long time, unable to decide what to do next.

This place was no longer safe for her, but if she were to leave, she'd be all by herself. She would have to take this journey alone.

She looked up at the door, at the food, at the note. And then she looked at herself in the mirror, staring at her reflection in the dirty glass. She inhaled sharply before folding up the note and shoving it in her back pocket. She picked up the plate and shoved the leftover scraps into her mouth before tossing the plate away. She took one last look at herself in the mirror, fixing her hair and nodding confidently.

As she stood up and stepped towards the door, she paused as she reached out for the handle.

She could either go with her father, or follow Maria's advice. This was her decision to make.

She opened the door and stepped into the hallway, looking left and right. She stood there for a while, still thinking to herself.

She still had questions that wanted to be answered, there was still more she wanted to see. Would she stay and trust her father? Stay locked in her room, locked beneath the earth until her father finished building the machine? Or would she follow her curiosity and learn more about the world she lived in and what it used to be like in the past? Would she be able to see Maria again and have her questions finally answered? Did she dare to find these answers all by herself?

She stood, she thought, she considered.

She looked down the hallway where her father was expecting her.

She inhaled and exhaled. She went down the other way, walking down the stairs as quietly as possible and towards the front door.

Her choice was made, and the path before her was finally clear.