Kelly

Three

I cautiously stepped into my new room and gently sat on the bed to wait. I didn't know what I was waiting for, but I didn't know what else to do. Eventually I stood to look through the cupboard in the corner of the room at the end of my bed. I didn't expect there to be anything in there but was surprised when it was filled with simple but soft clothes. Lots of different types of clothes. Dresses and skirts. Shirts and shorts. There were even a few shoes. Some were nice and I guessed they were for fancy dinners. Mama and Daddy used to take Marky and Sissy to fancy dinners sometimes, but I hadn't been old enough yet. Daddy said you needed to be at least 11 to be able to attend the Alpha's fancy dinners. Until then, I had to stay with Ma and Pa which was always fun because I'd get to bake with Ma and help Pa grow his flowers. My chest started to ache again, but I quickly pushed the pain away. I couldn't do that again, the doctor said I was lucky to wake up.

Instead, I picked a simple pair of soft grey shorts and a dark blue shirt. They didn't smell like anyone, not even the weird new smell from the shops. They just smelt like a closet. Which was fine. They were clean and dry, and they didn't have blood on them. That was better than the hospital clothes I had on when I woke up.

I put on my new clothes and then went and sat back on the bed. My bed. It was smaller than my old one. I had to share with Sissy, but we had two mattresses, and we pushed them together so that it was one big bed. This was just one small bed for me. It would be weird sleeping alone in a room meant just for me.

Time passed. I didn't know how much. My tummy started to make funny noises. Mama would always say that my tummy was a very noisy bear, and that I needed to feed it before it got angry. I hoped it wouldn't get angry here. Aunt Charlotte might not like an angry bear living with her. The light from the window was starting to look orange and pink, like when Mama used to tell me it was bath time.

I quietly stepped up to the door and opened it. I should ask about dinner. Beta Joesph and Aunt Charlotte didn't say when dinner might be. Mama always made dinner before bath time otherwise we always got food on our jammies.

I walked down the long, quiet hallway. Downstairs, the house was even quieter. I could hear the low murmur of voices from the kitchen. The door was slightly ajar. I peeked through the crack.

I could see Beta Joseph leaning against the counter, his arms crossed over his chest. He looked angry. Aunt Charlotte was standing in front of him, her hands on her hips.

"...a complete mess, Joseph," she was whispering, but her voice was sharp.

"What were we supposed to do? Say no? Refuse to take in the last living member of your sister's family after everyone else she ever knew was slaughtered? The Alpha would have our heads."

"We have enough on our plate, Joseph. The territory lines with the Shadowclaw pack are becoming more and more disputed every day. I don't have the energy to babysit a traumatized pup who doesn't even have her wolf yet. The boys don't need this distraction."

"She's family, Charlotte. Blood of your blood." Joseph's voice softened. "James was a fool, and your sister was a bigger one for following him, but that doesn't mean their pup should pay the price."

A growl rumbled in Charlotte's chest. "James was a mere warrior, not even a ranked member, and he was a disgrace to my family line. His weakness is a contagion, and now it's in our house. You saw Caleb's reaction. Her scent is all wrong. It's the scent of defeat."

"It's the scent of grief, you buffoon," Joseph snapped back. "She just needs a little love and structure. She'll be fine."

My tummy bear was roaring now, but not because I was hungry. I crept away from the door, my bare feet silent on the cool wooden floor. I went back to my room and closed the door softly, leaning my back against it. I slid down to the floor and pulled my knees to my chest. Defeat. Contagion. Weakness. The words echoed in the quiet room. They were like the grown-up words Sissy and Marky would use when they thought I wasn't listening. They sounded bad. Scary.

I wasn't weak. Daddy said I was strong. He said my inner wolf was just biding her time, waiting to be the strongest wolf of all. But Daddy wasn't here. And Aunt Charlotte said he was a fool. A tear slipped down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away. I wouldn't be weak. I wouldn't be a contagion.

I must have fallen asleep there, huddled by the door. I woke up to a soft knock. I scrambled to my feet and opened it. It was Aunt Charlotte. She was smiling again, but it didn't reach her eyes. She had a plate in her hands.

"Oh, sweetie, did you fall asleep waiting for dinner? I'm so sorry, I came to call you but you must have been exhausted. I brought you up a tray." She handed me the plate. On it was a sandwich, cut into neat little triangles, and a small pile of carrot sticks. There was a glass of milk on a tray she held in her other hand.

"Thank you," I whispered, my voice hoarse.

"You eat up, okay?" she said, putting the tray on my small white desk. "We'll get you properly settled tomorrow. There's a bathroom just through that door," she pointed to a door I hadn't noticed next to the closet. "Get a good night's sleep. Big day tomorrow."

She left before I could ask what was happening tomorrow. I ate the sandwich. It was dry and the bread was a little stale. The carrots were limp. It was nothing like Mama's cooking. But my tummy bear stopped growling, so I was grateful.

I found the bathroom and washed my face with a cloth that smelled of lemons, just like the rest of the house. I looked at myself in the mirror. A pale-faced girl with big, sad eyes and messy blonde hair looked back. I didn't recognize her. She didn't look like the girl who had danced in the living room with her Mama and Daddy.

I went back to the room and got into bed. The sheets were cool and stiff, but I still felt a warmth from Mama's arm around me. I tried to remember what her lullaby sounded like, but the notes were fuzzy, like the face on the little screen. All I could remember was the feeling of being safe. I wasn't safe anymore. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to be brave like the Alpha said I was. But being brave felt hard.