My Alpha Biker Mate

CHAPTER 22

CHAPTER 22

CASSIAN'S POV

My fingers are wrapped tightly around my glass of whiskey, as I bring it to my lips.

That is the only thing that seems to keep me sane at this point. I am thinking about more than enough. And it is enough to make me run mad at the same time.

There are almost a hundred files waiting for me on the table, and I cannot bring myself to even go through them.

My mind is still worried about everything that is happening with Nova. The ladies of the pack are not even hiding their level of disgust towards her. They do not like her.

They absolutely want her out of the picture. And I cannot have that.

I know that even the pack elders want me to pick someone in the pack. But Nova comes, and she is my real mate. I do not even know how I manage to control myself around her.

And then, there is the broker. I cannot push away the thought that he is going to approach me again with the same deal. It is going to be hard to reject something like that.

Especially when I am so close to the age when the curse is going to manifest.

Then what is Nova going to think of me? I am more than sure that she has a family back in the normal world. I cannot just keep her confined to the pack.

That is when it hits me that I do not even know much about her. I have not even had an actual conversation with her. Not when all I am fixated on is the curse, and the thought that she is somehow the solution to the curse.

“f**k,” I mutter, running a hand through my hair. I do not want to trade Nova. But at the same time, I want to live.

A firm knock comes at the door, and I hesitate, before finally asking the person to come in.

Jason walks in, and as his eyes land on the files on the table and the whiskey in my hands, I can sense his disappointment.

“It has gotten to this?” He asks, and I look at him, with an eyebrow c****d.

“What do you mean?” I ask, and he gestures towards the table.

“You're drinking a lot these days. And you haven't been working.”

“I always drink. And it's not a sin to take a break from work.”

Jason shakes his head. “Not like this. You don't usually do this. You're getting distracted. And you can't just expect me to sit back and watch you make a mess of yourself.”

It takes a lot for me not to throw my head back in laughter. “Make a mess of myself? You know I'll be thirty soon, right?” I ask, and he suddenly pauses, like he remembers everything.

I watch as he leans back against the door in exhaustion.

“Your birthday is in the next two months,” he says, and I feel my throat close up.

“My point exactly.”

“You're starting to look like a man with something to lose,” he says, and I look up at him, with an expressionless face.

He is not lying. The moment I stand, I know that I am scared of losing a lot of things. I do not want to lose Nova. At the same time, I do not want to lose my life.

“You've always led like a man half dead. And now, you're feeling things. You're hesitating. You didn't want to trade a life for yours.”

He is not lying.

Things are getting a lot more complicated than they are supposed to be. Than I want them to be.

“I need to find out everything about Nova's kind,” I say calmly.

Jason does not look like he is in support of the idea. “How are you even going to do that?”

“The archive of our ancestors.”

“You know that nobody has gone there in years.”

“And my father wanted me to find it. That's the only reason why he gave me the key.”

The key is right there on my necklace. My father does not ever want me to take it off. And there I am.

Jason is forced to take a seat, running his hands through his hair. He cares about me and even if he denies it time without number, I can smell it all over him.

“I'm worried about you,” he finally says, and I find myself biting my lips.

“There's absolutely nothing to be worried about,” I say calmly.

“You're getting into things that the pack had buried a long time ago. It never ends well. I don't have to tell you that.”

He is not wrong about that. But nothing is going to happen to me. At this point, even the ancestors have to be on my side.

“But Cassian…” he starts, making me look up at him.

“Are you with me in this, or not?” I ask calmly, and he bites his lower lip, like he is having to choose between a lot.

“Fine,” he finally says. “I'm with you. Just don't keep me out of the plans. And don't try to do anything stupid on your own.”

I want something. And it makes me so f*****g vulnerable.

For the first time in my life, I feel weak. I do not know if I will even be able to make it out of the whole thing without any drama.

I look over at Jason, and I can tell that he is more than willing to help. The both of us have done different dangerous things together. This is not going to be a first.

And now, we are going to do the same thing.

He stretches his hand, as he reaches over for the files that are on my table.

“Drop the whiskey bottle down. Nothing is going to happen to you. For now, you need to make decisions that will keep the pack together.”

There is a smile on my face as I reach out for another file. I am not alone in this.

I am never alone.

And there is always a way. I just have to find it.