Supernatural One Shots

What If

Sam x Reader

Reader helps the brother out with research for cases, only ever communicating through the phone or email. Sam is determined to meet up but she doesn't believe it's a good idea.

Warning: mentions of self-hatred

Sam: Good Morning Y/N, were you able to get any sleep last night or did you end up researching again?

Y/N: Nah I actually got a whole hour of sleep! I think that's a new record here lately lol

Sam: Haha, well thanks again for your help the other day, it definitely made all the difference

Y/N: All in a days work my good man :)

Y/N: You know I'm always here if you guys need anything!

Sam: Actually there was something I wanted to ask you...

Y/N: Oh yeah? What's that?

Sam: Well we're actually headed back to Bobby's for a while, any chance you'd want to meet up?

Reading the latest text message from Sam you froze, eyes going wide. You'd been helping the guys with research ever since Bobby introduced you a year ago. Well introduced is a loose term, more like gave them your contact info, ever since you'd always been a phone call or email away and ready to help whenever they needed it.

Of course you'd never actually met them in person, you'd been to Bobby's house and seen photos of the Winchester brothers here and there so you knew what they looked like. Both were handsome but Sam always brought a bigger smile to your face. After the first case you helped with you and Sam became great friends, always emailing and texting one another. Anyone who found your messages would assume you were together between the inside jokes and constant flirting. Many calls in you realized the sound of his laughter always made your cheeks redden, and he seemed to understand you in ways no one else seemed to.

You both loved to learn everything you could about anything to do with lore. Your parents had been hunters so you grew up much like Sam had, motel hopping and fighting monsters. When they were killed you decided hunting alone didn't seem wise and quickly became one of the top researchers for the hunting community. Often times you worked with Bobby and helped him acquire information not many people would be able to find.

Over the past few months Sam had occasionally mentioned meeting up in person, but you always made up an excuse not to. You'd fallen for the younger Winchester, hard. Sometimes you felt like maybe Sam felt the same way, something he would say or the tone in his voice making you blush. Shaking your head you thought for a moment before typing your reply.

Y/N: Not really a good time, maybe next time?

The usual feeling of disappointment washed over you as you hit send. It wasn't that you didn't want to see him, Chuck knows you wanted nothing more. You just didn't want him to see you. Standing up from the rickety motel room table you made your way into the bathroom and turned on the light. Staring at your reflection you saw your eyes begin to water. There was nothing you hated more in this world than your own body. The extra weight here and there, the odd shape of it. You knew you weren't exactly overweight but you definitely could stand to lose the extra fat around your face, arms, stomach, and thighs.

Hearing the familiar ding signaling you had a text message you took one last look in the mirror before turning off the light and walking back towards the table. Picking it up and selecting the message you froze the moment you read Sam's reply.

Sam: Is there anyway I could change your mind? I really want to see you Y/N...

Feeling fresh tears fall you began angrily wiping at your eyes, you'd had this argument with yourself and even Bobby a few times. When he found out you'd never met up with the boys he asked why, you told him the truth. Someone like Sam would never fall for someone like you, and you couldn't stand to see the disgust in his eyes upon meeting him. Bobby had tried to convince you otherwise but you wouldn't listen. Deciding the best plan for now would be to pretend to be asleep you set your phone back down and began getting ready for bed. Walking into the bathroom you took a shower, scrubbing to get rid of any evidence of your latest pity party. Drying off and changing into your favorite pair of plaid pajama pants and an oversized t shirt you decided to let your hair dry on its own.

Sitting against the headboard of your bed and flipping on the TV you smiled at finding Casablanca playing. You were a softy for old movies, now if only you had a giant tub of popcorn you'd be set. Realization struck and you suddenly remembered you had a small container of ice cream in the mini fridge from a few days ago. Walking over to grab it and a spoon you turned to walk back to bed when your phone went off. Checking the caller ID you internally groaned seeing Sam's name.

On one hand he would know you saw his message earlier if you answered, on the other you did really want to talk to him. Deciding to just play dumb if he asked you picked up the phone,

"Hello?"

"Hey Y/N, what are you up to?"

Looking down at your ice cream you frowned slightly, "Oh you know, living the dream, motel TV and a little Ben & Jerrys. What about you?"

You swore you could hear traffic in the background but decided he must be driving, "Not much, hey are you sure you can't meet us at Bobby's? It's been almost a year of talking to you through a phone, I'm starting to wonder if your actually a woman. You sure your not a middle aged man in his moms basement?"

You couldn't stop the snort that bubbled up, laughing you shook your head even though he couldn't see it, "Nope, I finally got my own place. Mom was disappointed but now at least I can stalk hot guys from my own living room."

You could hear Sam laugh, the familiar butterflies filling your stomach at the sound. Sitting down at the table you stabbed the ice cream with your spoon. "You guys almost to Bobby's?"

"Sort of, we decided to stop for the night and get there in the morning."

"Sounds like a good plan, we all know Bobby's a little more human after coffee."

Chuckling you could just picture Sam grinning, hearing the sound of a car door closing you assumed they had arrived at their motel. Weirdly enough you swore you heard a door shut outside too but didn't think anything of it. "Well I better let ya'll get some sleep, let me know when you need me again. I'm heading out first thing tomorrow but you know how to reach me."

"Y/N wait, um, I need to ask you something. And please, hear me out."

Slumping against your chair you knew what was coming, "Okay."

"I really do want to see you, I need to talk to you about something and I'd rather not do it over the phone or an email. Can we please meet?"

Opening your mouth to give him the usual answer you were interrupted by a knock at your door. Knowing only a couple people knew where you were currently staying you stood slowly, reaching for your gun. "Sam I need to call you back, someone's at the door."

"Y/N I..."

Hanging up you made your way forward, keeping the pistol behind the door you threw it open. A wave of shock washed over you seeing none other than Sam Winchester standing there. Your mouth hung open and no words seemed to form. Sam pushed both hands into his pockets, "Um, hey Y/N."

Shaking your head to clear it you couldn't help staring, "Sam, how did you, when did, what are you doing here?"

Stepping forward and effectively filling the doorway Sam simply stared at you, taking in everything from your y/h/c hair dripping from your shower to your beautiful bright y/e/c eyes. He noticed the freckles covering your face and running down your neck, wanting nothing more than to count them. You were the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. Looking back up into your eyes he smiled. "Like I said, I wanted to see you."

Crossing your arms you nodded, putting on a fake smile you stepped aside and motioned for him to come in. Once he did you realized Dean wasn't behind him. Closing the door you turned and leaned back against it, "Where's Dean?"

Sam looked around the room, smiling when he saw Casablanca on TV, he knew you loved old movies. "Grabbing us a room." Turning back around he gave you an adorable smile that made you blush. "Well, um, you said there was something you wanted to talk to me about, is everything okay?" Trying to suck in your stomach slightly and straighten your shirt you internally chastised yourself for not wearing cuter pajamas.

Clearing his throat and rubbing the back of his neck Sam actually appeared to be nervous, "Yeah everything is fine I just, I really wanted to see you. It's nice to put a face with the voice finally." He once again smiled at you, "I'm really sorry to just drop in like this, I'm sure you know I tracked your phone. I just needed, I mean I only..."

Walking forward you began putting up your ice cream and threw the spoon in the small sink. "It's fine Sam, I've been wanting to meet you too I just, things have been crazy lately." Turning around and leaning back against the counter as you crossed your arms you glanced up to see Sam staring at you. "What?"

Sam slowly took a step forward, "Nothing its just, your really beautiful. Better than I imagined really." He smiled wide at you. Your eyes widened and your arms dropped, clearing your throat to relieve some of the emotions trying to overcome you the air seemed to thicken with tension. "Sam don't, don't say things you don't really mean."

Confusion clouded his face as he took another step forward, "What do you mean? I'm not lying Y/N, what I wanted to tell you was that I'm in love with you. This past year has been amazing, even with everything Dean and I have had to face you've always been there to get me through it." As he spoke he continued to move closer until he stood directly in front of you.

Reaching up to cup your cheek and tilt your head up he gave you a small smile, "Y/N, your incredibly smart and funny, and your the last thing I think about before going to sleep and the first when I wake up." You could feel tears begin to form in your eyes at his words, you wanted to believe him, lord how you wanted to. But that little voice in your head refused to fall for it.

Moving around him and walking away you tried to fight back the tears, swallowing the lump in your throat. "Sam that's not me, I'm nobody special. I'm not going to lie I fell for you too this past year, but I know what I look like. You deserve someone as amazing as you are, and that's not me." You felt a single tear fall and reached up to wipe it away. You never heard Sam move but suddenly you felt a strong presence behind you followed by his arms wrapping around your body from behind.

Pulling you closer to his chest Sam let out a deep breath resting his head against yours, his mouth by your ear as he tightened his grip. "I'm not lying Y/N, I'd never lie to you. Your beautiful baby, I've waited months to meet you, hold you, kiss you. Give me a chance to prove to you how much you mean to me."

Closing your eyes you knew this was it, the moment that would determine everything from now on. Slowly turning in his arms you opened your eyes to meet his, staring for a moment you brought up one hand to cup his cheek. Rubbing the stubble on his jaw with your thumb you smiled, "Okay."

Sam's smile grew wide, not wasting any time he bent down to capture your lips with his, the warmth you felt while talking to him over the phone was nothing compared to the electricity surging through your body as he held and kissed you. Pulling back you could actually see in his eyes all the love he had for you. Smiling again you pulled him down once more into a kiss, knowing you made the right decision, if only you'd made it sooner.

Thoughts??? It took a few tries before it finally came out as I imagined it, let me know what you guys think!