Love By the Moonlight

Into the Frey

I never get anything i want. I’m looking into the eyes that one had love in them for me, or so i thought. He never looked at me the way he looked at her. He really loves her, I just wanted to be loved like that. I thought if i showed him she had faults, too. If i showed him she wasn’t as innocent as he thought her to be, that he’d see I’m just as good as her. Maybe, just maybe, I’d finally be enough for someone.

But once again, my conscience has led me astray. My wolf Anissa tried to get me to stop, but my dark thoughts were just too tempting, too alluring. They dripped with appeal and delight, and it felt like a drug to indulge in them. I could feel the rush every time. But, i should have listened to Anissa.

Because now, I’m gagged and bound on a stage looking at the man i wanted and his mate facing punishment. I could die here today, and i deserve it. My family looks up at me with disgust in their eyes. But not my father. His face is unreadable. it's almost like he knew this would happen.

I pull my gaze away from my family and listen to Alpha Killian. He’s so beautiful. Six foot three ripped like a Greek god, eyes that shine like emeralds and dark black hair that is always perfectly styled. I look at his mate, Penelope. She’s fair and sweet. Just as beautiful as him. She’s six feet tall, muscular, but still very feminine. Long beautiful alibaster legs, a heart-shaped face with beautiful cat shaped eyes. Her hair is golden like the sun, and her eyes are such a deep brown they look like pools of ebony. She’s so beautiful, and i hate her for it.

“Marren Blackpaw, you stand here accused of treason. You attempted to usurp your Luna from her rightful place and claim it as your own. You consorted with enemy’s of this pack to procure poison, you let in rogues, you let in the rogue king, you helped to start a war that killed hundreds of this pack.”

He’s right. I did all these things. And i would have done more. If he could of heard the dark thought that were echoing in my head he’d of been sicker than he was a week ago when i drugged him and hid his mate in the abandoned house outside the pack boarder. He’s lucky that Fey witch was watching. That she had all the antidotes. I hate her, too.

“It is well within my rights to sentence you to death, and by all rights i should. And believe me, I want to.” He hisses the last part at me through clenched teeth.

His mate grabs his arm and calms him.

“However, Luna Penelope has reminded me of your dark fey blood. And we can’t risk upsetting them. Part of having your people in our pack as mages means they handle punishment. And they have aloud for us to banish you from our pack lands. If you return, you will be killed on site. You may seek asylum from another pack if they’ll have you. But you may never return here.”

This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever had to do. If the dark fey really wanted to do something with me, why didn’t they just take me back to their realm? It's probably because I don’t have any magic.

Life would have been so much easier for me if i had had magic. Maybe my father would have actually been proud of me. He’s such an asshole. I did everything he ever asked of me. Everything i did I did to gain his approval. No matter how good i was or how well I succeeded, he was still indifferent towards me.

Mom said it was just how his race was, but i call bullshit. He was full of emotion towards her. He would smile, laugh, and show her tons of affection. Mom said it had something to do with the mate bond, but I’m a product of the mate bond.

I saw pictures of him holding me as a baby. He looked at me with so much love and tenderness, i can even remember as a kid playing with my dad and running around. Playing dress up and doing his makeup. We were the best of friends. But it all changed when I got my wolf.

i turned 13, i shifted, and then something in him shifted. I can see it all now. He was holding my hand as i had my first shift, tears in his eyes as i cried out in pain. I can still hear him asking my mother if this was normal.

But none of that matters anymore. Now I’m wondering the woods, all alone in my wolf form. We’re looking for a tree with tall roots or some rocks that look stable that we can dig out and rest under.

We know no pack in our state will take us in. Too much about us is known. If we have any hope of being brought into a new pack, we will have to go clear across the country. We’re currently in Maine, so maybe California? Washington state? Anything is better than here.

The fastest way would be to cut across Canada, but that’s Lycan territory, and I don’t feel like being torn apart limb by limb. So through the states, it is. One border at a time. This is going to take forever. I'll have to go once state down from the Canadian border to better my chances.

It takes us 3 months and traveling only at night while staying in wolf form, but we made it. We’re in Washington state. The weather is damp, and it rains a lot, but that’s pretty close to home, so that’s not bad.

we hunted for our food, so i was able to save the money that i had when i was kicked out. Mom and dad sent me with 500.00. My wolf carried our belongings in a backpack in her teeth. It’s tattered now but held onto everything.

Now that we’ve reached Washington, i can finally shift and put on some clothes. I’m going to go to the nearest hotel and rent a room and finally get a shower and wash my clothes. The warm water is going to feel amazing! I’m so excited! A bed, a shower! Warm clothes, warm food. Who would have thought that’s what I'd be looking forward to now, not me.