The Reject [MXM]

Chapter 2: Gone

Michael knew that what they were doing was wrong and inhumane, that they were dishonoring the memories of their parents, and practically spitting onto their parents' grave by doing such deplorable things to their youngest sibling. 

Elijah was the frailest of them all, needing more care than the average baby due to his premature birth. He's a sweet kid who always made their hearts warm over when he does something to make someone else's day better.

But, that is all in the past...

They could never go back to that time where everything was perfect. They had lost that when their parents breathed their last—lost all of that when they raised their hand against their brother.

'Traitor...' Michael's wolf was pacing anxiously, baring his teeth at him 'Kin...hurt...protect...leave...you'

Michael had grown used to this; hearing his wolf growling and baring his teeth at him with hostility. His wolf and he were once in sync with each other, having been able to smoothly transition from man to wolf, and wolf to man. That time was so long ago now... the moment he laid hands on his brother to bring him pain, was the moment his wolf hated him. His once smooth transition from man to wolf was now one of the most painful things to him, having to endure the pain of the slow process of going into a wolf as the wolf inside him rebels and howls in outrage of his audacity to call upon his form. 

Transforming into a wolf was his favorite past time, now... he avoids it as much as he can, just like how his siblings avoid it. All there wolves are rebelling against them, to the point that it feels like his head is always splitting into two to try and accommodate two different people. Their wolves have always been a part of them, blending itself to their human counterpart until they can be considered as one, to the point that they tend to forget that their wolves have a mind of its own—that they might not be able to speak in full sentences, but that they can feel and think on their own.

That is why the most important thing to a werewolf is their bond with the wolf that lives inside them. If they don't make an effort to make peace with that other part of themselves, they might as well consider themselves a human with a few unique attributes. The more the bond between the human and wolf strains, the more painful the transformation goes, up until the human dies of pain if they even dared to try it.

Wolves are pack animals, which means that family is the HIGHEST priority. 

Michael and his siblings betrayed the member of their family that should have been nurtured and protected, and their wolves are punishing them for it.

Michael sighed as he taps his finger on top of his desk. He was only half-listening to his professor when his wolf went ramrod straight, causing him to stiffen with tension.

'No...frail...brother...'  His wolf was whining, howling inside him as it tries to get out. Michael gritted his teeth when he feels his nails extending into claws, hurrying to hide it under the desk to make sure no one sees. He took deep breaths through his now fanged mouth, closing his eyes and forcing the wolf back with every bit of strength he has.

His wolf raged within him 'Out...gone...brother...fault...yours'

Michael knew something was wrong—terribly wrong. His wolf and he were in a fierce disagreement, but it has never been this bad.

He practically flew out of his seat once class was done, bolting for the doors like the hounds of hell were on his tail. He screeched to a halt when he nearly bumped into someone, making a move to apologize before he froze when he saw Hunter panting and sweating like he was running for hours on end.

"Dude, are you okay?" Michael reached out to lay a hand on his friend's shoulder "You look like shit."

"Thank you for the unneeded comment" Hunter snorted, then paused as he looks at me "What the hell happened to you? You look like—"

"s**t?" Michael finished dryly.

Hunter nodded.

"Almost shifted in class today" Michael explained as he urged Hunter to continue walking "Wolf suddenly grew restless and keeps forcing his way out. You...?"

"Same"

"Why?"

Hunter shrugged, not even noticing that his feet were starting to move faster "Dunno. My wolf just kept howling about mate and gone..."

They were almost running now, gaining a few strange looks from the other students as they raced towards their car "Mine keeps howling about my brother..."

Both of them screeched into a halt, realization dawning into them, then they were diving for their cars and racing out of school like men on a mission.

Slamming the door of his car open, he runs for the house, distinctively hearing another car door being slammed closed behind him. He runs up the stairs to the attic yelling his brother's name as he slammed the attic door open.

"Elijah?" He weakly called out, sniffing the air as he tries to locate his younger brother. 

He looks around and felt his heart squeezing when he saw how dirty and small the room was. This is what they forced his brother into, to live in a setting worse than an omega. 

"Eli...?" His wolf was huffing inside him... claiming that he doesn't have the right to use that name anymore—that he was unworthy of it.

A glint of something on Michael's peripheral caught his attention. He turned towards the bed to see a frame innocently sitting beside 5 colored envelopes. He went to pick up the frame when Hunter burst into the room, head swiveling around with a speed that makes Michael wince.

"Where is he?" Hunter turned to face him.

"Gone..."

"Gone...?" Hunter chokes out "Gone where?! The kitchen, backyard—where?!"

"I don't know!" Michael snapped back "I was at school the whole time. How the hell am I supposed to know where he is!"

"You're his brother!" Hunter argues "Ask your wolf about his whereabouts!"

"Hunter..." Michael sighed, scrubbing a hand over his face "We're werewolves, not a f*****g GPS. It doesn't work like that and you know it."

"What's this?" Hunter furrowed his brows as he picks up one of the envelopes on the bed.

"I don't know..."

"Then what do you know?!" Hunter snapped.

"That you're being a huge asshole right now!" Michael snapped back "Why do you even care anyway? Last time I checked, you hated him to the very core of your bones."

"The same could be said to you" Hunter crossed his arms. 

"I don't hate him!" Michael argued.

Hunter snorted "Could have fooled me"

A sound from the stairs alerted them that someone was running up. Aaron skidded to a halt outside the opened entrance of the attic, Aemie following behind him; both their chest heaving as he looks at Michael "Where is he?" 

"We don't know" Michael sighed out.

"What?!" Aaron hissed "How can you not know?"

"Don't you f*****g dare take that tone with me." Michael warned, then plopped down on the bed "Why do we even act as if we care? It was only yesterday when you three were beating the s**t out of him, and me acting like he doesn't exist..."

"That's different" Aemie argued.

"How?!" Michael snapped at her, not even feeling sorry at the way she flinched at his tone "This is f****d up and we all know it. It was just a few hours ago that we left him bleeding on the floor of the dining hall, and now we're acting like we're some kind of worried family. This... this is messed up..."

"It's our wolves" Hunter concluded "We're acting like this because of our wolves. That should be it."

Michael gave him a look. 

"That should be the only conclusion!" Hunter defended "You just said about us beating the s**t out of him a few hours ago, and now we're acting so worried about him. That could be the only conclusion!"

"What's this?" Aemie held out one of the envelopes to Michael "It has your name on it."

Michael snatched the letter from her, hands already working it open as he brings it close for reading. He could see Aemie distributing the letter from his peripheral vision but chose to ignore it in favor of reading his.

Dear Michael,

Hi, Mikey! If you're feeling angry at me for using that name, please find it in your heart to forgive me for that. It's been a long time since I've used that name that it kind of sounds foreign to me. If you're reading this letter, then that means that I've already left pack land, and I know you're thanking the Moon Goddess that you're finally rid of me, but please listen to me... just this once would be enough.

I want to say my apologies for being a huge burden in the family. I know that you blame me for our parents' death and I don't fault you for that. If mom hadn't jumped in front of me to protect me, then she wouldn't have died. Dad would still be with us if he didn't fight that rogue that came after us, even with all the injuries that he had, he would have survived if it wasn't for me. If there weren't any me in the equation, our parents wouldn't need to protect someone for the cost of their lives, and I know that no matter how much I apologize, I will never be able to compensate for that.

I want to thank you for all the beautiful memories that you've given to me as a child, no matter how short it was. I will hold it close to my heart and treasure it like no other, just like how I will treasure my days with Ron and Ams. I want you to know that no matter how much you hate me and my existence, that I would always love you. I can't ever replace our parents, because their existence can't compare to no other. I hope that you know that you were the best big brother I could have hope to having... don't tell Ron I said that, okay? 

Maybe things will change for me if I just hold on, but until then I will be hoping that we can go back to being close like how we were back then. I'm only 15 years old as I'm writing this, so maybe the feelings that I'm writing now will change, but always remember that the one thing that will never change is that we are family, and to me—nothing is more important than all of you. 

I can't come up with anything more so I'll just end this here. I'm sorry for taking your time... if you even read this letter, and I hope that you'll have a good life ahead of you. There is no me now that will hold you back, so just forget about me—burn everything that will remind you of me if you want, anything is better than me plaguing your life. 

From Elijah Wilson,

P.S I know that you're feeling doubt about yourself becoming the next right-hand man for the Alpha after Dad, and not being able to compare to him, so I'll just say this real quick. Don't doubt yourself, you might not do the same thing the way Dad did things, but I'm sure you'll do better than him. Dad was a great right-hand, but I'm sure that he will agree on me with this. You'll be a great beta.

Michael was perplexed when he saw droplets of water falling on the paper, only to realize that tears were streaming down his face as he clutches the letter close to him.

"Damn it!" Aaron bellowed, furiously scrubbing at his eyes "Who would even tell you that they still love you despite all the despicable things you've done to them?!"

"Elijah has always been the most forgiving" Aemie quietly stated. The usual confident girl looks defeated and ashamed that it thugs at Michael's heart just staring at her.

"It wasn't just our wolves..." Michael muttered, glancing down at the letter "No matter how many times we hurt him, there was a part of us that felt guilty for doing it. We were family once, nothing can change that, not even our anger and despair about our parents' death changed that..."

Aaron bit his lips "I guess we thought that he would always stick around... no matter the abuse..."

"No matter how strong a person is, they too have their limits." Aemie was still staring at her letter "Elijah had hit his today..."

"I don't blame him for leaving..." Michael sighed "I'm shocked that he stayed all this time"

Michael turned to stare at the quiet Hunter, watching him clench the letter in his hand as his shoulder trembles.

"Hunter?" He called out

"I need some time alone" Hunter muttered, turning to leave the room, pausing to look at the frame innocently lying on the bed before practically storming out.

There was a moment of silence inside the attic, all in their heads, beating themselves up for being horrible to the one person who they should have protected.

"Promise us that you'll look after Elijah. Promise us that you four will stay together no matter what happens... promise us this..."

"We promise."

"Michael... I leave our little Eli in your hands..."

"Leave it to me..."

The words of their parents' last request echoes inside Michael's head. He grits his teeth and squeezes his eyes shut to stop the tears from falling. He promised, and the very next day, he had broken that very vow himself.

His wolf was laying down, eyes silently accusing 'Know now...promise...broken...brother...left behind...mother...father...youngest...left us with...protect...'

"We have to search for him." Aaron declared, eyes glinting with determination "I know that we don't have the right to see him anymore, but I at least want to say my piece and apologize."

"You're not going to bring him back?" Aemie furrowed her brows at him. 

"Would he even want to go back?" Aaron fired back "I don't know about you, but I sure as hell ain't going back to the place where I suffered for years... Elijah left because he couldn't take it anymore. Do you really think he would go back if we ask?"

Aemie bit her lips.

"Exactly!" Aaron said.

"If we find him" Michael butted in "There is no guarantee that we would be able to track him. Elijah might not have been going to school with us, but he's not stupid. He knows how to cover his tracks. Our parents made sure of that—it was the very first thing they taught us..."

"Then we just have to look harder!" Aaron persisted "He's bound to leave a trail somewhere."

"Are you even sure that he's going to hear us out?" Michael sighed out "Realistically speaking, once he catches even a smear of our scent... he's gonna run. I don't need to be a genius to know that. Do you think that the first thought that will come into his mind once he catches our scent is that we're going to apologize?"

Aaron and Aemie were silent.

"Exactly my point!" Michael threw up his hands "The first thing that will come into mind for him, is that we're there to drag him back to his hell, not to apologize... that would be the very last thing that will ever come into his mind—hell, I don't even think he'll have that idea!"

"Then we'll just continue looking!" Aaron said "We messed up big time. I know that now; and I want to make up for it, no matter how too late I am."

"Then... let me ask you something..." Michael crossed his arms "Did you ever feel any shame beating him? Did you ever feel regret building inside you when you left him on the floor bleeding? Did you ever feel disgusted towards yourself as you laugh when he was in pain?"

Aaron bit his lips "...no..."

Michael nodded "That's right. We won't even be thinking about the notion of apologizing and fixing things with Elijah if he didn't leave. Just a few hours ago, we didn't feel anything but contempt and disgust for him. This sudden change of behavior doesn't make sense, and it will never be..."

"Then what do you suggest we do!" Aaron cried out.

"We go to therapy and get our shits together" Michael concluded.

"I'm confused..." Aemie furrowed her brows.

Michael sighed, scrubbing a hand over his face "What I'm saying... is that we really think about our past actions and reflect on that. We need to fix ourselves first before we even think of fixing whatever bond we still have with Elijah. We can't just go looking for him with half-assed feelings. A single apology will not make up for all of what we've done, and I am not entirely confident that we are not going to fall back into beating him if we don't get some proper help. Years of feeling contempt towards someone just doesn't go away, you know—it's not something you can just make disappear at will. If we are going to look for him to try and fix things between us, I want to be able to say that we won't ever go back to being his abusers with confidence, not with trepidation and uncertainty because we felt some smidge of guilt after reading his letters and knowing that we f****d up real bad. Elijah doesn't deserve that... nobody does."

Aemie and Aaron were silent, contemplating his words carefully before finally nodding to themselves.

"You're right" Aemie admitted 

Michale smiled "I'm glad that you see my point."

BREAK

Hunter wanted to break something—anything... if only to calm himself down.

His mate left, and it's all because of him.

His wolf was howling in grief 'Fault...yours...mate....gone...hurt...pain...'

"Pinky promise that we're always going to be together!!" The words echoing inside his head feels haunting—like it's silently accusing him of his crimes.

'Mate...bond...you...did...' His wolf growled 'bond...not...break...have...chance...still...fix...mess...' 

"What even needs fixing?" Hunter muttered, chuckling bitterly to himself "Elijah is gone, and we need to forget about him. Life will continue to move forward even without him here."

'Liar...fine...you...not' His wolf huffed out 'turn...time...not…possible...forward...only...future...undecided...still...'

"I beat him and abused him until he couldn't move!" Hunter snapped "Who would want to be with someone who hurt them? No one!"

His wolf was sitting on his hunches 'Failure...you...glad...you...know...'

Hunter growled "I don't need your input right now! Our mate is gone!!"

'Fault...yours...not mine...' Hunter wishes he could smack the smug look off his wolfs' face. 

"You're not helping" Hunter gritted out.

'Not...trying...to...' The wolf stares at him 'Mine...mate...gone...you...are...failure...me...tried...to...stop...'

Hunter rakes a hand over his blonde locks, gripping it tight with frustration—frustration towards himself. Elijah and he were once close to each other, and he f*****g destroyed that because he wanted to fit in—because he didn't want to hang out with the loser and the so-called slave of the pack. He was the Alpha Heir, he didn't want to be seen with someone that was not even seen as a living being.

As he grows older, convincing himself gradually becomes easier until the notion of being with Elijah makes him grimace with disgust. When he realized that Elijah was his mate, he was so horrified that he didn't even want to be in the same room as him, beating his mate up to cover up his horror. His horror turned easily into anger, and it was just so easy to lose himself to that feeling, especially when all Elijah does is whimper and whine in pain. The absolute feeling of superiority that washes over him was addicting... and that had cost him his mate and what could have been a future filled with happiness.

'Despise...you...suffering...me...for...your...mistake...' His wolf growled 'All...because...of...you...' 

Hunter could feel tears of frustration seeping out of his eyes; hands clenching into fists as he tries to stop the onslaught of emotions that is happening inside him.

"He was supposed to stay no matter what happened to him!" Hunter flipped his table in a fit of anger "He was supposed to stay here with me!"

His wolf shook his head in disappointment 'Selfish...so...selfish...mate...not stay...hurt...here...'

Hunter slumped down on the ground "I didn't mean for this to happen..."

'Lie...done...would...not have...' His wolf sighed 'Aware...you were...still...you hurt...mate...'

"How can I even begin fixing this mess?" Hunter whimpered

His wolf hummed 'Get...things...right...have...to get...help...confess mistakes...then...move...there...'

Hunter lets himself cry for the time being. He needs to let out these emotions before he even begins to try and fix the mess he calls himself.

The connection between his wolf and him that was so strained for years now, suddenly feels a little lighter.

'Glad...you...listen...now...' His wolf huffed out

Yes, everything is a mess and so chaotic right now, but Hunter could hope—hope that maybe...just maybe, he can still atone for every single mistake he's done in the past.