SIGHT

Chapter 10

  Seeing her lying there, on the hospital bed, it's so painful. How just a few moments ago we laugh together and walking together. I wish I'd tell her all about my feelings for her. I want to see her beautiful smile again. My heart aches to hear her symphony like a laugh. I break down again. I crouch down, my head on my knees, my brain trying to give me a scenery of if this is not happening. If she didn't decide to go get her favourite chocolate bar, if I didn't try to chase Bell, if... so many if, but the reality is lying right there. So hard for me to comprehend.

    Remorse, regret, anger were all my mixture of feelings right now. From what Millie's mom, Rachel told me, her surgery wasn't going so well, she scarcely made it, but I think her strong will that keep her alive, but barely because she's in a coma now. She's breathing but she's not there. I want to go back in time, so, I could change all of this s**t that's happening to her. How I wish so. I can't stand seeing her like this when I'm the one who should be there. I stand up and started to walk out of the room. As I walk, I saw Rachel. She was sobbing with my Mom's arm wrapped around her shoulder. Her dad and my dad were in a very deep conversation, a sombre look on their faces. Ash was there too, as he sees me he stands up, probably trying to give consolation to me, but I don't want any comfort words right now. All I wanted was for her parents to scream at me. Pouring me with their anger and sadness and frustration. Because I was the one who put their daughter in that position right now. I turned my gaze away from Ash and met with Rachel's eyes, they are full of tears. But none of it had any blaming look. I can't take it. I started to run.

    Ash tried to stop me, but I shoved him aside. I keep on running, letting my legs take me away. It was suffocating there. I need to get out. I wasn't aware where my legs had taken me, when I opened my eyes, I was on a rooftop. I look around, trying to catch my breath, and walk slowly to the edge. I tiptoed a little and leaned my head forward, looking down, busy streets, I glance at the buildings, knowing that I'm on the rooftop of one of the hospital buildings. I took a deep breath. I moved away and turned aside, then, that's when I saw her.

    I don't know who she is, but she looks familiar. She was standing there, her hands on the parapet wall, gazing at the view in front of her. She didn't register I was watching her. Who is she? She must be patient judging from her attire, she's wearing a hospital gown. She looks so small and fragile. Suddenly I felt like I wanted to run to her, holding her hands, but was scared that she might run off or just fade away, that's how brittle she looks to me. She seems real but wasn't too at the same time. I wanted to see her face. I cleared my throat, making a noise to get her to notice me. She lifted her head, and turned in my direction, I saw her face. My jaw drops my heart beats fast. Her eyes widened, and then the both of us talk at the same time, "Millie??" and her with "Danny??" We both still staring at each other. "Wait, Danny, you... You can see me?" she breaks the silence. I get a recall of the incident, about her state right now. No... Oh no, what does this means? "Oooh... f**k" is the reply I give to her question.