Breakthrough

Prelude

"I haven't come to terms with how we said goodbye."

"Petals" Mariah Carey

Paige didn't' know how long she'd been outside. She didn't even remember walking away, only that she felt like she was suffocating from lack of air, too much heat and noise that she prayed shed never again hear and she had to get out of there. Now. She honestly just wanted to go home and crawl on her bed and take a nap. She didn't even know how she was getting home. Great, another question to ask someone later.

Paige approached the church door, her eyes fixed on the light outside. She paused momentarily, then stepped out into the brightness, her feet carrying her down the stairs, one step, then another, until she had descended nearly 20 steps.The next thing she knew it was quiet. It was cool. And she could breathe. Really breathe.

It wasn't until someone touched her shoulder that she snapped out of it and realized where she was. The sudden contact made her jump.

"There you are lil' sis. You had us looking for you upstairs."

Paige smiled when she realized who was now with her. She turned around and looked at her brother's face. He was trying so hard to smile but she saw the worried look on his face.

"What are you doing out here?" It was just like Nathan to be keeping watch so it's no surprise he found her all alone at the bottom of the church steps. "You aren't running away are you?"

Paige simply said "no" just serious enough for him to know that she had no intention of running anywhere, but light enough to not cause concern for her disappearance in the first place.

She wasn't much of a talker. But her mind was a different story. And apparently she's been in her own mind for so long that people noticed she was missing from the room. Being only 6 years old meant she was never out of sight for long. Always being looked for. Too little to be lost. But she was lost.

Their mothers body was upstairs in a casket with mourners everywhere and five children trying to simply get through the day in their own way.

Paige was feeling overwhelmed. No one seemed to be "in charge" even though family members were everywhere. Everyone was towering over her, some whispering and pointing at her. She didn't really understand what was happening and what it would mean for her later.

Paige didn't know how to put into words everything that she was feeling. "It's hot in there and people are pointing at me", she told her brother. His silence made Paige look at him again.Nathan's eyes dropped to the ground, and Paige knew it wasn't because he was interested in the dirt, but because he was struggling to find the right words. People's conversations about her were likely fueled by her age and the difficult circumstances of not having a mother but he wouldn't tell his sister that.

"Don't worry, sis, I've got you, always," Nathan said softly, offering a reassuring smile. He gently wrapped his hand around Paige's, and after a brief glance upward, began leading her up the stairs, his calm pace matching her weary one. "Let's get you something to eat." When they reached the top of the stairs, Paige looked at the bottom where they'd stood moments before. They entered the church, unasked questions still swirling in her head.

Things were about to change dramatically, and soon. She could feel it in her stomach, and on that day, she knew to trust her gut.