JOURNAL OF MY EVERYDAY LIFE MAMF

DO NOT FORGET AGAIN 04162025

April 16, 2025

12:00am

"Do not forget, again..."

Sorry again, Lord, for what I have done today. I have really been so impatient. It’s been three days again since I last wrote. Thank You still, Lord, for the healing You have given to Mama. I know that You are continually supporting her inside and out. I am really praying, Lord, that her usual strength will return. I know she has faced so many challenges, especially with all the things she feels in her body, and as she gets older, her body is not as strong as it used to be. But Lord, You are always the one who renews our strength daily. In times when we are weak and have so many things on our minds, I know and believe that You will provide for us, that You are always there for us, and You will not leave us to handle things on our own. More than we need finances or things to survive each day, we truly live for You, Lord, and we are truly dependent on You. We can’t imagine life without You, because You are not just a part of our lives, but You are our life, Lord. Knowing my daily struggles and even those around us, Lord, there’s no better answer than You, God. Since this is my first time at online work, I feel a bit anxious that I might make mistakes or get scolded. There was actually a chance for me to start earlier, but I decided to prioritize attending the family camp event instead. Lord, whatever doubts I have right now, I still surrender them all to You.

Proverbs 4:5

5 Get wisdom! Get understanding!

Do not forget, nor turn away from the words of my mouth.

I’ve been able to reach out to the girl again, Lord. I don’t know if it’s right that I’m still entertaining her. What’s important is that I don’t give any hint that I like her. I really don’t want to risk relying on her or on the people around her. I don’t want my feelings or emotions to become dependent on another person again, Lord. I really pray that I can keep everything balanced. I want to have time for my family, time for friends, time for church, and time for myself—I really want to balance my time for everything. Most importantly, I should always have time for You, Lord. Sometimes, I just keep in mind to write to You. I know it’s easy to type, but I want the eagerness and willingness to write for You to really grow in me. I know, Lord, that I am truly dependent on You, and I want that even in the small details where I receive wisdom from You, I won’t forget to write down what You have imparted to me. Whether it’s in services, events, my writing now, just walking on the street, or wherever I am, Lord, I pray that whatever You speak to me, I will listen right away.

Thank You, Lord, that I’m not giving in to my negative emotions right now. I almost had an outburst that wasn’t necessary and almost got triggered by a chat that shouldn’t have affected me just because I felt ignored. There are times when I really need to be the first to understand people. I really pray, Lord, that my responses to everyone will be okay and acceptable. If they can’t accept it, at least I was true and right before You, Lord. I don’t want to please people just to be in their good graces. I want to stand for the truth. Sometimes, Lord, with too much kindness, maybe we end up compromising. Maybe I just want them to like me, that’s why I try to please them. I really pray that people will also be genuine with me. I don’t expect everyone to trust me, but I really pray that I won’t overshare things that might be misinterpreted by others. Help me, Lord, to still trust people—not totally with information, but to still give them a chance to have a purpose. More than trusting others, I really want to trust myself to stand by my word of honor. Not just for You, Lord, but also for my family, friends, and church. I really pray that I won’t forget what I should do, according to Your will and not just to please people.

It’s tiring to adjust sometimes, but if they need to vent, let them go where they’re comfortable. If they need to avoid me, it’s okay, Lord, as long as they don’t avoid You. The more I open up to people, the more I should open up to You, Lord. I don’t want You to be second to anyone or anything. Above all my priorities, You should always come first, Lord. Whatever challenge I’m facing now at work, where I should have started already, I will face it. If this job is really for me, You will surely give it to me, and I will have security and assurance from You, Lord, that I can continue. Help me to earn in a way that the company will also be good to me, Lord. I know work is not easy, but I really pray that I can handle it long-term, Lord. Help me achieve my dreams, Lord—not just because I have a job, but because You are always there in everything I do. Protect my integrity, Lord, which I know has already been damaged by the things I’ve done. Others may not trust me that much anymore, but in Your grace and mercy, Lord, I truly believe there are still people who trust me. I really pray, Lord, that more than trusting me, they will trust You first. Help me to be a better man than before, better than yesterday. I will never forget, Lord, again and again, all the goodness You have shown me. Whether I have a job or not right now, I will continue to serve You. I will never regret doing things for You first, Lord, before my personal desires. I LOVE YOU JESUS❤️