JOURNAL OF MY EVERYDAY LIFE MAMF

DO NOT STRIVE 04062025

April 6, 2025

9:18pm

"Do not strive..."

Wow, my overthinking is intense, Lord, but thank You for today because we were able to acknowledge Pastor Jerry's 25 years of service in our church as Associate Pastor and Head Pastor of Discipleship. He is also our District Overseer for Negros Occidental and Panay but will now be assigned as Senior Pastor at WIN Talisay. Lord, I am so grateful for their family. From forgiveness to hope and love, Pastor Jerry's teachings will always be treasured and remembered by me. He is actually one of my mentors, even though we never had formal mentoring sessions, but I learned so much from him. Like a father who corrects and teaches his child the right way, that's how I felt with Pastor Jerry. He may be strict in some ways, but I truly appreciate how sincere, genuine, and true he is in his actions. A Man of Honor whom I will always look up to even as he moves to his new assignment.

Even for the Vasquez family, Lord—from Tita MaiMai, who has been so considerate and forgiving about what I did to her regarding the flowers (even though it was a long time ago and I still need to make it up to her in a silent way), to Gab, the eldest among them, who was my best friend during our childhood days in Sunday school (though I had a crush on her back then), to Imman, who was always corrective with me but whom I enjoyed spending time with during both good and bad times, and also Che, also known as Rachel. Rachel played a big part in my leadership journey when she handled YA (Young Adults), and our friendship since then—from children to youth to YA—has been an incredible journey.

I earnestly pray that this family will continue to prosper, Lord. Protect them from people who seek to harm them or enemies we cannot see. Continue to strengthen and bind them as a family so they can serve as an example to many others, especially at WIN Talisay—a family that serves You in spirit and truth.

Proverbs 3:30

30 Do not strive with a man without cause,

If he has done you no harm.

Galatians 1:10

10 For do I now persuade men, or God? Or do I seek to please men?

For if I still pleased men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ.

So much is happening today, Lord, especially in my mind. It’s still so difficult, Lord, to deal with people who seem good in front of you but behind your back, their actions feel so unpleasant. I know, Lord, what is right and wrong in what I do, but if my thoughts toward them are wrong, please correct me right away. Thank You still, Lord, for helping me realize that I need to write every day for You. There are so many distractions, but I will continue what I’ve started, Lord. I may not be consistent, but I will always have the eagerness to write for You.

Am I still pleasing men up to now, Lord—especially my leaders and family? Am I still pleasing my friends just to avoid being told that I’m wrong? I don’t want to play it safe anymore, Lord; I want to stand firm for what is right. But why do I get triggered by things that haven’t even been directly confirmed by the people involved? I wish they would just be straightforward with me instead of confirming things with others. Maybe that’s their way because they trust other people more or don’t want to offend me. Knowing that they’re all still young, I entrust them to the adults who are guiding them. But I pray, Lord, that I won’t be mean toward them. I may not be the same as before, but it’s up to them if they feed themselves with things that aren’t good. For now, Lord, I’ll focus on guarding myself rather than others.

I pray that pride won’t consume me, Lord, because in the first place, I have nothing to boast about—only You. Help me to be more sincere and true to You whenever I serve You. I don’t want to show off just because leaders or people who look up to me (whether I know them personally or not) are watching. I pray that I can build a strong foundation of faith in You rather than relying on what others say about me. If possible, Lord, let me avoid receiving praise because sometimes it feels excessive and doesn’t reflect who I am. I don’t want recognition because of my abilities; instead, I want people to recognize You first—like hearing them say, “Thank You, Lord, for letting me know Mark.” There are times when I long for appreciation too, Lord, but I don’t want it to inflate my ego; instead, I want to return all the goodness they see in me back to You.

I don’t want others who aren’t involved to be affected by my emotions because sometimes my feelings generalize everything around me. Teach me more, Lord, how to always forgive rather than let anger and resentment take over. Help me not let bitterness grow where it doesn’t belong because there’s no reason for it toward them. Even though I may not have all the resources now, what matters is that I can still sustain myself. You are always a friend to me—a friend whom I don’t need to ask from others.

No matter what they think of me now, Lord—I don’t even know if it’s right anymore—I’m unsure if avoiding them completely is the right thing to do when they ask for help with even the smallest things. But at the same time, Lord, I don’t want my heart to harden toward them because the more I hold onto this within myself, the more it will affect those around me—especially the people who matter most to me.

Lord, I don’t want to ruin myself over petty things. I want to dedicate everything that I have to You so that every day will be better for me. Help me recover from my past weaknesses and not let my old self define who I am now. Help me share more encouraging words with others instead of defending myself against those who think negatively of me. Help me be true to myself without being driven solely by emotions. Help me become the person You want me to be as Your child.

Help me not end relationships with friends who have hurt or misunderstood me. Help me focus more on Your goodness rather than on what people think of me. Help me be more appreciative rather than envious of what others do or achieve. Help me stay positive instead of dwelling on other people’s faults. Help me be more considerate—not only thinking about myself but also about others.

Lord, help me always listen to Your instructions so that I can consistently do what is right. I LOVE YOU JESUS❤️