JOURNAL OF MY EVERYDAY LIFE MAMF

LET GO BUT DON'T GIVE UP 03192025

March 19, 2025

12:27am

"Let go but don't give up."

There are really times, Lord, when I feel restless. I get tired easily and I suddenly quit. I just want to rest more today, but it's not possible because I've already allowed my body to become lazy. Thank You, Lord, for today that I have another opportunity to share Your word and the wisdom You have given me. After writing for a long time, I've learned English and it has become normal for me. At first, it was difficult for me to express myself, but lately, I find myself saying things in English. Today, Lord, is another memorable day that happened to me. I rejected a certain class and an interview today because I'm tired right now. I just want to focus on my responsibilities in other things and prioritize what I can respond to, especially in the service at church. Sorry, Lord, for the mistakes I made. Every day, the challenges level up, but I won't stop writing in this journal because I need it. Remembering the times I let go, there are many, Lord. Not just about work or my job before, but also people I clung to. Whether they were close friends, the girls I committed to in relationships, or even my own family. I had regrets before when I totally let go of my past relationships because of my mistakes. I tried to save our relationships, but it couldn't be forced. There were times when I didn't want to hurt them, that's why they stayed. But it always ended in moments when we reached our limits. They left me without proper closure. I thought that when I was in a relationship, it was the one. From endearments like Wiffy/Wifey to Babe, to simply just hearing your sweet name when you were around. But I noticed, Lord, that they were always the first to confess their true feelings, and I just responded or followed up because I also had feelings for them. I pursued, but I was cautious, Lord, and they were aggressive when it came to confession. I admire them for their courage, but in the end, they were the ones who broke up with me. I learned a lot from them, and they learned from me too. There were times when we tried to get back together, but it didn't work out. You already knew, Lord, that if it wasn't meant for me, it wouldn't be. What would happen if we remained friends? I think we wouldn't remain in that because either we would go beyond friendship or become strangers to avoid any obstacles. Lord, I pray that I will not be desperate to find the right one for me, because You have always been there for me, always available.

Ecclesiastes 9:10

10 Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might; for there is no work or device or knowledge or wisdom in the grave where you are going.

Is there a time when you let go but it seemed like nothing was happening? Is there also a time when you didn't give up, but it still seemed like nothing was happening? Letting go and giving up are different, but thinking beyond them may lead to a greater purpose. If you let go of something, there's always a reason behind it. You may not see it now, but you will know and appreciate that it was the right thing to do. As for giving up, if there are things in life that keep you going, especially for the Lord, don't give up on them. It's hard to start a commitment, but once you lose your momentum and consistency, laziness will prevail, and before you know it, you're already acting on giving up without even realizing it. Life is challenging, especially when you don't have much to do. But I did turn down two opportunities; one was for small earnings and the other had potential for high earnings. At that time, Lord, I just wanted to fulfill our needs for the day. I went through difficulties, but I volunteered to attend the practice for our upcoming activity this week, which is RESET. I could have rested knowing there was enough backup, but I chose to follow our leader's instruction to attend since the singers hadn't been finalized yet. I knew the need, but I concluded that it was already met. It's been a tough battle lately, Lord, to fulfill what You want me to do. I fight my flesh daily, and there are times when I fail. Can I blame myself? Yes, but I still believe in the change that God wants to happen in my life. Being dependent makes it hard to move on. The opportunity to serve is not for everyone. In every open door where I can serve God, I will definitely do it. I had to pause when I felt unprepared and saw myself not ready to minister. But no one is ready when God moves. I pray, Lord, that I will always be sensitive to Your presence so I know how to respond when You are near. Knowing You daily keeps me going, and I can't stop thinking about what else I can do for You. I did let go of things for You, God, but there are also things I'm still holding onto that I shouldn't. I'm not giving up on seeking You daily. I want to share with others close to me the burning fire of encountering You. I don't want to do things my way, Lord; Your ways are always better than mine. I'm grateful, Lord, that You always give me chances, opportunities to serve, avenues to change, and a heart that cries out for You. I pray that what comes out of my mouth will always be more about You and not me, more about You and not the positive or negative things that happen. I will always live by faith, Lord, that no matter what happens within the day, You will be glorified. I've been struggling a lot lately, Lord, especially since I committed to writing to You in this journal. I see myself improving each day, especially in character. In attitude, there are things I need to work on, but I can't do it alone, Lord. I need You always to guide me and strengthen me. I don't want what I say to remain just words, but to have application and transformation in my life. You are my greatest help, Lord, not only in trouble but in every circumstance. I admit, Lord, that I can't let go of everything, but whatever I have, it's from You. I don't want to carry everything I have because it all comes from You. Let my patience grow every day, Lord, so I can learn more about waiting, being obedient to Your word, and being a good influence on the people around me. I'm really glad, Lord, to be part of the Frontliners team. I'm happy with the set of friends I have now, especially those from church. Protect our friendship, Lord, because it encourages us to go on with life. Thank You, Lord, for our families who are ever supportive of our service to You and who also serve You. I pray, Lord, that people will also have quality time with You that they won't miss every day. I LOVE YOU JESUS❤️