In Love With You

Chapter 19

"The New CEO"

ERICA's POV

I glanced at my mirror and checked my look before getting out of Ans' car. His secretary came to get me and my parents since he's already busy with the now on-going event. We didn't dressed-up that much. I mean, we're just being invited as a close family friend not us clients and investors. The event is being held at one of the most famous hotels in the country. It's a very important even that every businessman in the field of information technology are attending. As cars being pulled at the front of the hotel, flashes from cameras are everywhere and it looks like a star-studded event in the movies. I am just so glad that we didn't entered the hotel via the hotel's lobby. Ans' Secretary accompanied us on the basement's parking lot and escorted us to the main hall where the event is taking place.

Another mixed emotions rushed through my veins when we entered the banquet. It's a wide hall where a lot of elegant people are tossing their wines and talking like their from the elite class of the society. My parents saw Moms and Tito in his wheelchair as they approached us. We thanked them for inviting us and they also thanked us for coming. I was a little shy when I heard them calling each other "balae" which means they're thinking of my relationship with Ans could go into that level. Aargh! Where is he? I walked through the other side of the banquet and there I saw him from behind. God, I can't even get myself to call him. I mean, how could I? He's talking to some elite gentlemen in their most elegant posture while I'm just wearing a not so formal dress.

"Ans"

A blonde woman in a skinny long gown approached him and I got my jaw dropped seeing how elegant she is. I just found myself suddenly studying myself and looking at my not so skinny legs plus my so ordinary casual laced dress thinking I am so out of place.

"Hey pretty"

I shifted my gaze when I saw a wine being offered to me.

"Jaz?"

I guest he was invited.

"Yup. So why are you in this corner eyeing at your boyfriend?"

Always the most observant.

"I can't seem to figure out how to approach him." Which is true. I'm not confident enough of how I look and definitely of who I am and what I have. People might ask what I do for living or worst, my parents might be involved too.

"What's the matter? You're stunning and you look great"

I arched my brow and he almost spilled his wine.

"Seriously Jaz?"

He just laughed and that made me laughed too.

"Erica"

A monotone voice called me and I saw uncertainty in his gaze as I faced him.

"Hey Ans, thanks for inviting me dude."

Jaz went to congratulate him and he accepted it too.

"So, I'll let you both have the moment since your lady is getting a bit uncomfortable."

Jaz smirked and left while Ans eyes are still in his back.

"Ans.."

I held his hand but I felt his eyes glanced around observing everyone. To my surprise, he pulled his hand from mine and combed it straight to his hair. Was he trying to avoid me? Why did he approached me then? And why did he even invited me in the first place.

"Sorry.." I almost whispered as I felt my breathing heavily. This is too much. I have been feeling so small since I entered this place. But as of this moment, I felt like I'm just a tiny bit of a trash.

"Do you want some food?" He asked out of nowhere and I just smiled.

"No, I'm fine."

He's at least 3 steps away from me but I felt like he's from a distance.

"Sir.."

His secretary came to us and I stepped backward a little more to give them privacy. Plus, he's acting uncomfortably talking and facing me is pushing me to just run away. And I swear, I want to run away from this place now. There's this heaviness in my chest and a feeling of being unwanted. I was trying to hold my eyes from breaming any tears. I suddenly begin to asked myself who am I, who am I to stand beside him and to hold his hands when I have nothing compared to these people around him.

"The CEO for an established Transport group is here with his daughter. You should go meet them, this is very important."

I heard him said that. And partly, I was thankful since he doesn't need to face me anymore.

"Erica, I'll be back. Just enjoy your self. Eat whatever you want. Don't drink too much."

I just smiled and nodded. But in my head, I am practically running. Running away from everything that's making me question my being.

"Erica ija"

I turned around when I heard Ans' father called me.

"Tito"

Some are still greeting him and asking him of how he has been but not as much as others are approaching his son. Maybe because Ans is the CEO now.

"Erica, are you okay?"

He might have noticed me feeling so uncomfortable. I just smiled because I didn't want to force a lie that I'm fine but I'm not. Not to this old man at least.

"Erica, mauna na kami ni Papsi mo at masama ang pakiramdam nya."

Lumapit samin si Momshie at nagpaalam narin kay tito.

"Momshie, iiwan nyo ako?"

Gosh! I really wanna go now. Hindi ko na kaya dito.

"Anak, samahan mo si Ans. Kaylangan ka nya dito. Hindi ba balae?"

Oh come on! Spare me, I don't wanna hear that. They just laughed at each other and my parents went out of the hall. I was still feeling bored and tensed when Tito reached for my hand.

"Ija, it's gonna be a little more tougher. But you need to keep you eyes straight. Okay?

I didn't even get what he said. I just smiled and tried to calm my senses.

"Can you help me with my wheelchair?"

I nodded and he thank me. Little did I realized, we're headed to Ans talking to some old folks and another blonde woman. God knows how much I'm shaking right now.

Everyone greeted him as we approached their group. Seems like they've been working with each other when he was the CEO. They've been praising his son and admiring Ans so much which is true. He has been doing really good. He had changed a lot. I know. He was holding a wine and glanced at me as he sipped from his glass. Our eyes met, I smiled but he stayed emotionless. I hate to admit it, but he's acting like he doesn't know me.

"And who's this young lady with you?"

Tanong ng pinakamatanda sa kanila. I got chills and prayed that Tito wouldn't make a mistake of introducing me to them. My hands turned cold in just seconds as I noticed Ans' uneasiness in my peripheral vision.

Afraid huh?

I was even thinking of answering the question by myself now. What would he do if I would tell everyone who I am? Would this blonde girl stop smiling at him? But of course, that's something that I can't even claim. It's then that I realized, this is how pathetic I am and that me trying to enter his world is such a huge illusion.

"Shes my-

Tito was about to talk but I cut him off.

"Tito, sorry I need to use the comfort room."

I excused myself and didn't look at Ans at least once. He doesn't deserve it and I don't deserve this neither.

"She's my very close friend's daughter. She's been like a daughter to me. She's in the field of business and I've been wanting to recruit her and help Ans with the company."

I heard Tito said that and I couldn't be more happier and confident of what he just said. I didn't stopped walking out as my tears are already falling. This isn't fair. He's just so unfair. But Tito was right. I didn't graduated as a c*m laude in Business management for nothing! He might got the Surname of an Heir, but I'm confident that what I have right now is what I worked hard for. How dare him.

I ran out of the hotel and burst out crying at the bus station near the entrance of the hotel. I didn't mind people looking at me anymore. I was just thankful that it's already 9pm in the evening and that the street is no longer busy. I settled myself seated at the bench of the bus station. Thankfully no one was there. I kept thinking how pathetic am I that I had to go through such humiliation with myself. And worst, with the guy I've been with since I learned how to talk.

Another tear fell and I tried to calm myself. Enough for this nonsense. It's time for a little self-respect.

The bus came and I stood up but a griped pulled me in the arm.

"Why are you out here?"

Speaking of the devil! I didn't answered 'cause I swear, this is not the best time for us to talk.

"Were you crying? Are you okay?"

I smiled sarcastically and comb my hair. And believe me, when I do this, not a single word that comes out of my mouth is kind.

"Ans, let's drop that 'are you okay' thing 'cause we both know that we're not."

He reached for my hand but I hesitated.

"Don't hold my hands, it might tarnish your reputation." I said, firmly and he was surprised.

"What the h3ll Erica. That's not how it is!"

He held his head like I'm causing him a headache. Come on!

"Oh yeah.. it won't. No one's around anyway."

I decided to turn my back and just walk out. This conversation might only worsen everything.

"I'm sorry okay?"

I stopped. How could he just say sorry in an instant and repeatedly hurt me again!

I faced him and tried to control myself. There is that one single reason that I'm holding on to. It's the fact that we were best friends.

"For what Ans?" I manage to control my voice as it may crack any moment. He didn't responded. Instead, he came nearer and held my hand.

"Look, I'm sorry. Sorry I couldn't get myself to introduce you to them. I wasn't sure if you were ready for it. I wasn't sure how people would react-

He was stopped with tears continuously running through my face. He tried reaching for it but I escaped his hands off of me.

"Erica, please understand. I'm sorry."

I calmed myself and wiped my tears. Too many tears for such an awful guy.

"It's so easy for you to say sorry after treating me like nothing in front of your guests. You were worried of what they'll think and how they'll react. But you never considered how I felt."

Tears fell again. I hate it. He tried reaching for me but I moved back.

"I didn't mean to make you feel that way. Believe me." I saw his eyes breaming with tears ready to fall. But I laughed sarcastically.

"Alam mo ba, pagpasok ko palang sa loob, ganito na kaliit yung tingin ko sa sarili ko." I gestured an inch with my fingers to emphasize it to him of how small I was feeling for myself.

"I was praying that you could at least see me and tell me that it's okay whoever I am. Yun lang. I wasn't expecting you to introduce me or be near me. Pero nung lapitan mo ako, I felt even worst."

I got my face wet and my wholeness trembling inside.

"Ginawa mo akong parang hangin. I was expecting that from the people around but not from you! You made me feel like I don't even exist. How dare you make me question myself worth?"

"Erica please-

I tossed his hands away from me and maintained my distance.

I sighed and relax before facing him again.

"Do you know how I was able to survived when you were away? I had to keep being alive, remind myself that it's not gonna take long. Though I was missing you a lot, I told myself that you're a different person now. I made myself believe that one day. One day my best friend will come back. But you know what I realized tonight? That Ans, that man I've know for years was gone months ago. And you know what's worst? I didn't just lost my bestfriend. I lost myself."

I picked a cab and left.