Food, Cats, and Being Lazy

Chapter Ten

My week was made. Nothing could bring me down. I got along with people in classes. I wasn’t as much of a loner for once. I even sat and watched soaps with my mom, but then she wanted me to get really involved and tried to get me to watch again. But I decided to just go to my room and watch TV there instead. And since Paige was spending all of her time trying to comfort Hannah, she didn’t bother me either.

The weekend was great. Hannah came over to my house and I could hear her crying in Paige’s room. I felt really bad for her. I really did. But I was happy at the same time because I just happened to overhear her saying Collin broke up with her because she made out with some guy when she was drunk at a party. He refused to take her back. She also said she was sure he liked someone else. But she didn’t know who it was.

I knew it was a longshot, but I hoped that person was me. Then we could go out and I could get a makeover and show up at prom all beautiful and perfect and everyone would be jealous. But I wasn’t going to get my braces off until winter and I couldn’t go to prom because I was a sophomore—hmm—that’s okay. I could be pretty and perfect and also have braces.

When I got to school the next Monday I waited for Lara in the atrium but she didn’t show up. I figured she wasn’t at school so I went to PE on my own. But then Lara turned up in my English class. So I wrote her a note and passed it to her when I went to sharpen my pencil. She didn’t write back. And when I left the class I found the letter in the trash can by the door.

At lunch, I went back to the atrium where she would have to pass to get to the stairwell. She didn’t show up until later. I figured she wasn’t coming at all, but then she passed through with a group of girls. Lara was the only person who never treated me like a waste of space. Until that day.

“Lara, hey,” I said standing up when I saw her. She turned around with the other girls. One of them whispered something to her and she looked me over as if she was ashamed of ever having spent lunch with me.

Then I noticed something different about her. She got her hair cut. It was usually really really long, but she cut it and had stylish bangs. She also wasn’t wearing her usual clothes. She looked—like the other girls in her group.

“Can I help you?” she asked. I blinked a few times.

“I was wondering if you wanted to eat lunch with me.”

“Um—why would I want to do that?”

I wanted to remind her that we had lunch together every day since the first day of freshman year. But something in the way she said it, and the way the girls were looking at her, assured me that she didn’t want them to know we hung out.

“Never mind,” I said. “Forget it.”

I grabbed my backpack and rushed out of the atrium to go to the stairwell on my own. I sat down on one of the bottom steps and tried not to be hurt about it. But I was. Lara and I weren’t great friends, but for a while she was the only one I had. Now I had no one. And before I knew it, a tear dribbled out of my eye and my throat closed up. I wasn’t upset that Lara didn’t want to be my friend anymore. I was upset about how she’d done it and for the fact that I was now completely alone.

When the bell rang, my eyes were red and swollen and I didn’t want to go to class. I would just sit there until someone found me and deal with it if I had to. So I wrapped my arms around my knees, plugged in my headphones, and drowned out the loneliness with the mixed CD I found in my mailbox.

My headphones weren’t on very loud so I could hear it if someone found me. No one found me during the first half hour. Then I heard the door upstairs open and footsteps on the stairs. I stayed right where I was. If it were a teacher or security, they would just tell me to go to class. But it wasn’t. It was my sister’s boyfriend. He stopped at the bottom of the stairs in front of me and stayed there with his hand on the door handle.

“Pip?” he said. I didn’t know why he called me that. I never asked anyone to call me that, and he never really spoke to me directly.

“Go away,” I said. He took the seat next to me.

“What’s up?” I shrugged.

“Nothing.”

“Your eyes say otherwise.”

“I’m not going to tell you because you’ll tell Paige and she’ll rub it in my face. She always does.”

“I don’t tell her everything, you know?” I sniffed.

“It’s nothing. Just—tired of being treated like dirt.”

“Who treated you like dirt? Want me to kick their ass?” I laughed. I appreciated it. Vincent was always nice to me. We never actually talked, but he’d been with Paige for a long time so I saw him a lot. And he never treated me badly. What I mean to say is that he at least never looked at me like I was inferior because he was good looking and popular and I wasn’t.

“It’s okay,” I told him. I wiped my eyes again. “It was a girl. We have lunch together every day since last year. Today she decided she’s too good to be seen with me. I guess she’s not really my friend, but—one kind of friend is better than no friends, right?”

“Not really. I’d rather be alone than be with someone who doesn’t treat me well.”

“You’ve never had to be alone. You have a sister who’s like your best friend and parents who love you. Plus you have Paige.”

“You think your family doesn’t love you?” he asked.

“They love me because they have to,” I explained. “My whole life revolves around my stupid cat.”

“Well, he is a cool ass cat.” I laughed again. I was glad he thought so. Paige hated Reggie. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. You have me. We’re friends.” I scoffed.

“Hardly. We’re barely acquaintances.”

“We went to the movies together once, remember?”

“With Paige and Phillip and only because my mom said you had to bring us on your date and you guys were attached at the face the entire time.”

“Well, one kind of friend is better than no friends at all, right?” Damn him for using my own words against me. “At least I don’t treat you like dirt.”

“Yeah, you and you alone.”

“There are a lot of people who care about you and respect you, you just haven’t met them yet.”

“Yeah—okay.” He was quiet for a second.

“Well—I have to get to class. But we’ll hang out, okay?”

“I don’t really want you to hang out with me because you feel sorry for me.”

“I’m not. I’m going to hang out with you because you’re cool and I like your cat. You should really go back to class though before you get caught.” I sniffed.

“I’ll be okay, and I’m glad you like my cat.” He smiled and stood back up. Then he waved and left me alone.

Then I didn’t feel so bad anymore. Maybe it was something new. I lost Lauren as a friend, but I gained Vincent. And if I had Vincent as a friend then Collin was just one step behind him. And he already knew I existed and he never treated me like dirt. So therefore I had to think of it as a good thing. Who was Lara anyway? Just a girl who thought she was better than me when I was the only person to pay any attention to her. She could bite me.