Captive Luna

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

    It had been a month since their first time. As promised, Bailey took her wolf out for a run frequently. He had asked the pack doctor randomly about pregnancy and whether it was safe for a she-wolf to shift. He had gone in for his physical and happened to see a pregnant nurse and then asked him. She had stopped in to give Dr. Brennan some notes and Bailey had congratulated her. It seemed like the perfect time to ask. Dr. Brennan had said that she could shift safely up until the month she was due.

    It was a beautiful day, they spent the night running outside the borders, though not straying too far out from the territory lines. Claude was beautiful, a deep shade of charcoal grey. Gray was a lighter grey, ironically, almost silver. Claude and Gray got along well – too well. They spent most of their time mating while she and Bailey sat back and watched them rolling around in the meadow, laughing at their antics. She felt happy for the first time in a long while. He hadn’t marked her, and she was unwilling. Not because she didn’t love him – she did with every fiber of her being. She was scared her ex-mate would somehow find out.

      “Beauty, please let me mark you,” he breathed, sucking in his breath. They were in a clearing in the forest, just outside the borders. Her belly had just popped, she was almost at the halfway point of her pregnancy. He loved every curve of her body, being pregnant, her body made him want her in the worst way. He kissed her belly as she leaned back supporting herself with her arms. He licked the underside of her belly, along her panty line. She shivered in delight.

       “Lincoln,” she breathed. She grasped his head, bringing him closer to her face. “I would. And it isn’t because I don’t love you. There are so many factors we have to consider before we take the plunge.”

        He sighed and rolled onto his back, staring up at the beautiful night sky. It was late summer now, but still warm and humid. They had this conversation, and it always ended the same.  He asks, she says no. He loved her; he knew he did. Did she really love him?

       “Babe, you keep saying that, but I don’t agree,” he sighed, running his hand through his hair. “I love you and only you.”

       She turned to face him, searching his eyes. She knew he loved her, and she loved him a lot more than she did her ex-mate. The mating bond was strong, but after much consideration, she decided that choosing to love someone was far better than adhering to something out of their control that the Moon Goddess because it was a choice. She had a say. She still believed the Moon Goddess paired wolves for a reason, and believed it still worked for others. While she wasn’t spiteful to the Moon Goddess, she was angry at her for putting her through hell with her ex-mate. She didn’t breathe a word of this to anyone.

       “I don’t doubt that,” she said, kissing his lips gently. “I love you too. It’s hard to find someone who’ll willingly accept a person who has a child.”

        “Our child,” he corrected. “The baby in your belly is mine. I might not have put my seed inside you to create that pup, but she is mine no matter what you say. I love her.”

        She smiled. She wasn’t sure what the s*x of their pup was, but she stopped correcting him long ago. She was happy he wanted to raise her child as his own, but she knew that would mean she has to move out of the cell and into the open. She couldn’t risk that.

       “You seem so sure our pup is a girl,” she laughed. “But there are so many other reasons why I can’t allow us to mark each other.”

        “You keep telling me,” he sighed as he rolled his eyes. “Why does it matter? I want you, I want your pup as my own, I want to hold your hand and take you out on dates, I want all of that, baby!”

        “Babe,” she sighed. “I know you want all of that, but you still haven’t found your mate. Danger aside if we mark each other and never mind that Alpha Xander could very well kill me because I’m technically a rogue and you’re harbouring a rogue. I don’t want us to mark each other and then your fated mate comes along.”

         Fated mates and chosen mates were different. Fated mates undoubtedly felt the mate pull. Chosen mates felt it after they marked and mated each other, though not as strong. If a wolf chose a mate before they met their fated mate, when and if that happened, the mate pull will still be there. It was stronger than the chosen mate pull because it was the Moon Goddess’s will. They would have to reject each other to continue being with their chosen. They wouldn’t feel the exact same as they did before finding their fated mate, but most worked through it and strengthened their bonds with time.

         “I know, I know,” Bailey replied as he stood up. “She isn’t out there. I would have found her already. Either way, it doesn’t matter, it’s you I want. I want to be with you, I want to marry you, I want to put more pups in that belly of yours.”

         “You want to what?” she said, eyes wide.

         “Erm – “he cleared his throat. “I mean one day, after we mark each other, and our pup is a little bigger.”

         “One day baby,” she stood up and wrapped her arms around his neck. “When I feel like it’s safe to and we’ve spoken to the pack doctor about it.”

         She knew she didn’t know enough about rejections, and how it would affect her ex-mate. She assumed he could potentially feel something when she had s*x with another but couldn’t be sure. She also didn’t know how markings worked after a rejection. She didn’t want to cause Bailey pain but for herself, she truly didn’t care. She loved Bailey.

         They gathered themselves and got ready to leave when suddenly she gasped.

         “Are you okay baby?” he asked, rushing to her side. “Is it our baby?”

         She clutched her chest. There was pain radiating through her heart, taking her breath away. She was gasping for air.

         “Okay baby, breathe. In through your nose and out through your mouth,” he said calmly. Was she giving birth? It was too early. She was struggling to breathe. He picked her up bridal style and ran back to his place. In no time, he was kicking open his door and rushing her to his room, laying her down gently. She was still struggling to breathe, the pain in her chest going strong.

    He had mind-linked Dr. Brennan to come to his home immediately. Dr. Brennan was asleep when he heard Bailey screaming in his head. He changed quickly, grabbed his bag, and ran to Bailey’s house. He and Bailey were friendly, they had hung out a few times. He made it upstairs when he saw a rogue she-wolf on his bed, clutching her chest.

    “What’s happening?” he said, looking at the rogue. He gently took her hand away from her chest.

    “She has pain in her heart, and she can’t breathe,” Bailey said with a nervous note in his deep voice. “She might be having a heart attack, I think.”

    “She is pregnant,” Dr. Brennan said. “Is the pup yours?”

    “Not by blood,” he answered honestly. “But the pup is mine regardless. She's about three months along.”

    “That’s commendable Bailey,” he smiled. “She is not marked by you, but I do see faint traces of another mark.”

    “She was mated before and she rejected him,” Bailey said, his voice containing traces of anger. “What does that have to do with her pain?”

    She suddenly relaxed, the pain gone from her face.

    “It means her previous mate was having s*x or relations with another,” he said quietly.

    “But she rejected him, she shouldn’t feel anything,” Bailey replied in disbelief.

    “He never accepted,” she said, her voice raspy. They snapped their heads to look at her.

    “Baby, are you okay?” Bailey asked frantically.

    “Tired and sore but I’m okay,” she responded.

    “What do you mean he never accepted?” Bailey asked her. He knew wolves could reject each other but he didn’t know it had to be accepted.

    “When a wolf rejects another, it has to be accepted by the other party if the rank is high enough,” Dr. Brennan answered for her. “It means her mate – ex-mate, I should say – was of equal or higher rank than she.”

    “Is this true? Was he a higher rank than you?” Bailey questioned her, looking at her searchingly.

    “He was my equal,” she said quietly. “I don’t want to talk about him anymore.”

    “Well,” Dr. Brennan began. “It looks as though you’re feeling better. He must have stopped whatever he was doing with the other wolf. Because he didn’t accept your rejection, it stands to reason you will continue to feel those effects whenever he does and vice versa.”

    Her eyes snapped wide open at that.

He can feel us when we’re with Lincoln? She said to Claude.

Fuck if I knew, she responded. If I knew, I wouldn’t care either way. He’s put us through enough, it’s time for us to put ourselves first!

    “So – so he knows when Lincoln and I…” she trailed off.

    “Yes, he knows.” Dr. Brennan began gathering his belongings. “Though I don’t know why you've rejected him, I assume it was for a good reason. Wolves don’t just reject their mates for shits and giggles. Medically speaking, you're fine, and  I recommend you live your life as you see fit. But know that he can feel you and vice versa. Be cognizant of that.”

    “How do we get rid of the bond if he won’t accept?” Bailey asked the doctor.

    “You’d have to mark her, only then would the bond sever from her ex-mate.”

He nodded at Bailey and took his leave. Bailey plopped himself down on the bed next to her. They were silent, each deep in their own respective thoughts.

    “So, this,” she said quietly, glancing around his room. “Is where you sleep.”

    “Yes, baby,” he turned at looked at her lovingly. “This could be where you sleep too.”

    She froze. She knew he was going to press the issue further. She knew she couldn’t risk it. Her ex-mate was an awful man, she wouldn’t put it past him to find her somehow and make her Lincoln pay for ‘taking” her away from him. Even though she left on her own accord, he was narrowminded enough to shift the blame equally on her Lincoln.

    “I, I think,” she whispered. “I think I should return to my cell.”

    She slowly got out of his bed, gazing at him. He sighed and got up to leave. They walked across the training field, and back down to her cell. He wasn’t happy with it, but he couldn’t force her to come and stay with him. His efforts were fruitless at this point.

    “I think we should take a break for now,” she told him as they entered her cell.

    “What?” he all but yelled at her. “Why?”

    “It’s just a lot to process,” she replied, plopping down on her bed. “Give me some time, please.”

    He didn’t like the pleading tone in her voice.

    “Fine,” he sighed. “I’ll be back after training.”

    “No,” she said quickly. She needed the space to ensure she wouldn’t compete in the bedroom gymnastics, lest her ex-mate feel it. “Please send someone else with my food.”

    A pained expression came across his beautiful face. His eyes flickered between hazel and black, but she knew it wasn’t lust. It was anger.

    “You want me to stay away?” he asked, calmly. His eyes conveyed the opposite. He was trying hard not to shout at her.

    “Yes, for now,” she said faintly. She wrapped her arms around his neck, willing him to look at her. He did, but his expression did not change. She went to kiss his cheek and he pulled away. Her face crumpled, tears threatening to flow down her cheeks.

    “Fine, I’ll stay away.”

    He gently extricated himself from her embrace and took a long look at her.

    “When you’re ready, send for me.” He said with finality, heading toward the door. He glanced at her just before he exited, closing the door firmly and locking it.

He hates us, she cried, tears spilling unable to contain themselves any longer.

He’s angry at us, Claude said sadly. Maybe we should tell him.

We can’t tell him! She snapped. I don’t want to be responsible if something happens to the pack, especially to Lincoln!

    Claude whined and padded away, hiding herself deep in the recesses of her mind. She laid down on her bed, willing sleep to find her.