Family above all

chapter 1

It's been a week since my were brutally murdered in the comfort of our own home and still nothing. They have nothing, no suspects, no purpose, no reason nothing.

It's like those idiots aren't even trying to find anything. They're just sitting in the f*****g office like it's a f*****g normal day meanwhile my life is slowly falling apart.

I'm stuck in this stupid foster home trying to be strong for the only family I have left while I'm slowly and quietly dying inside. I pretend to be okay when all I want to do is just to numb the pain. To let my anger that's building up every f*****g day out. I want to end it all.

But I can't and believe me I've tried countless times and every single time I-I can't bring myself to do it. There is always this little voice at the back of my head telling me that if I go through with this, I would be no better than my parents because I would be abandoning 2 more people who need me.

Guilt overwhelms my need to free myself, every time I even glance at a knife or a bottle of any kind of pills.

I'm the only thing they have left in this world and it's now my job to protect them. Even though I'm hurt, hurt because they left me the day before my birthday. I'm angry, angry because I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye.

I'm angry because no one seems to give a f**k about our pain, no one seems to care that the s**t head who ruined a happy family still f*****g living and probably enjoying his day with the people he loves when I-I'm robbed of the chance to ever be happy again with my family.

We haven't been to school since last week, we haven't had any contact with other people other than each other. I haven't talked to Taylor since I left school because my phone has been off for the entirety of the week.

Lord have mercy when I turn it on again. The foster care people have tried to get us to speak to them, but we haven't said a word to them since we got there, by the third day they even brought in a physicist but me and my sister still haven't said a word to them.

Ethan gave up after he got hungry for ice-cream but us stubborn Evermore girls continue to hide the more, they try do they eventually gave up. All in all, they are good people and I have nothing against them I'm just not ready to talk to them.

There is also the fact that now Ethan has developed night terrors and they are seriously scary to watch. He sleeps with me because he doesn't seem to respond to anyone else but me.

They happen at least three times at night and they are honestly exhausting for both of us. When he gets like that he starts to sweat profusely and shake like he's having a seizure or something.

We barely get any sleep because of that and the physicist says he will get over them soon but in the meantime, we must be careful not to expose him to anything that may trigger his memories.

Today was Monday and it's time for us to go back to school as well as the day of the funeral. let's just say I'm not in the mood to deal with that bullshit. In the past week, my attitude to life has taken a complete 180. I just don't see the point anymore.

My happy, shy, small self has been replaced with this shell of a human being filled with anger, frustration, and sarcasm. Things that people did to me that once seemed so small send me over the edge, you even so much as glance at me the wrong way and you won yourself an as beating.

I think its safe to say that my old self has been ripped to shreds by my new angrier self. I stood in the mirror staring back at this unrecognizable person. She looked like the dictionary definition of s**t. Eyes had bags, she was thinner, she looked...empty. I sighed and walked out of the bathroom to my room, so I could get dressed.

As I stood looking through my clothes for something decent enough to wear the last conversation, I had with my mum and it brought me back to tears.

I sat on the floor leaning against my bed where Ethan was still asleep and held my head in my hands allowing myself to let it all out. The least I could do just this once was dress like someone she would be proud of.

I got up off the floor and started digging through my closet for the outfit of the day. A black short flow skirt covered with light pink cherry blossom flowers and dark pantyhose, black crop top with a zipper at the front-ending right between my boobs, my mum's golden chain with a golden cross, black combat boots, and a black leather jacket my dad bought for me on my 15th birthday along his favorite skull ring.

I know that my clothes are completely black but give me a break it's my parents' funeral today. For my hair, I left it down but decided to curl it. Today I wore a little light make up as to where normally I wouldn't even touch the stuff.

The foster parents Mr. and Mrs. Helvant stood in the kitchen Mr. Helvant behind Mrs. Helvant with his arms around her as she cooked. They reminded me so much of my parents that it kind of made me want to kick something. They haven't noticed me standing in the doorway because they were to wrapped up in each other to see anything else. It's sickening.

I cleared my throat crossing my arms and scowling at them and they instantly pulled away from each other snapping their heads in my direction so fast that I'm surprised they didn't simultaneously break their necks.

A blush rose to Mrs. Helvant's cheeks and I'm pretty sure Mr. Helvant was blushing too, but I couldn't tell because he was a much darker man.

"if you too are done, I would like to get my food before I leave for school with my sister" shock replaced their embarrassment which was confusing because I'm pretty sure I wasn't speaking Spanish.

When I finally realized, I was being engulfed in a huge bone-crushing hug by Mrs. Helvant and I froze on the spot. I can't breathe. If this is how I'm going out very disappointed in my life

Why is this happening? Could I have done anything to avoid this? She finally let me go after a couple of seconds leaving me a confused mess. I rose my eyebrow at her questioningly.

"you finally talked to us... we were starting to think you'd gone mute" she smiled brightly at me holding me at arm's length.

I finally caught my breath my sister was standing in the doorway wearing a cute little bag they got for her since she lost her old one and pouting at me.

Mr. Helvant strolled around the kitchen island towards the pan of bacon and eggs, Mrs hellbent helped him with the plates. They gestured for us to come to sit down.

"No quiero ir a la escuela, por favor Elaine, no me hagas ir" Coral whined dragging her feet to my bike. Ethan was still sleeping because he didn't get much sleep last night. Or the entire week for that matter.

I decided to let him skip today and I was going to let stay with him because I still didn't trust the foster parents and I was extra protective of my siblings now. Never the less I complied but made her promise that he was safe. Hell, I only just recently allowed them to be in the same room alone with the kids, so this is a big step for me but I'm slowly and surely getting there.

Mr. Helvant offered to drop us off at school but I didn't want to impose, and I had my bike, so I could just drop Coral of as per usual. I didn't want to become dependant on them since I wasn't even sure this is where I'll be living for the next year.

On the way to school Coral never stopped whining. "¿por qué Ethan llegar a quedarse en casa?" she asked still pouting as I helped her mount my bike. She mumbled some incoherent words which sounded like a curse word under her breath as I was about to get on behind her.

"lo que acabas de decir a mí?" I questioned folding my hands over my chest and I felt her tense up. I have never been one to take blatant disrespect lightly especially from my younger siblings, more so now that I am more easily triggered.

"no e-es justo" her voice broke as she spoke barely above a whisper and tears sprung into her eyes. I wrapped my arms around her trembling figure knowing this wasn't really about going to school.

"Oh, cariño, lo sé, lo sé, no sería lo mismo sin ellos, pero todavía me tienes. Va a estar bien lo prometo" I said trying to comfort myself more than her. I gave her quick kiss on her cheek before I drove off.

When I dropped her off at school, I had to explain to the teacher the situation and give her a written note explaining her absence. I also gave the school my number with specific instructions to call me if anyone upsets her in any way. As I was leaving for school which I was already way late for, I could see from the corner of my eyes a sympathetic expression which only made me feel worse about my life.

I was about 1 hour late for school, so I had to rush to the second period since there was no point in going to first with 5 minutes left. I rushed to my locker in the empty halls to grab my books and started walking to class when I was stopped by the last person I wanted to see today. Ladies and gentlemen put your hands together for the one and only swipe of the school, Mr. Haze.

Seriously doesn't he have anything better to do. "young lady why aren't you in class?" using his signature charming tone we all know and love.

"oh, sorry old man but I was kind of busy minding my own business, I understand your confusion because you seem to be incapable of doing just that" I replied turning on my heels to face him as I spoke in a sickly-sweet tone. God knows how long I have wanted to do that.

"young lady I am a member of staff and you will show me respect!!! And what are you wearing?!" he yelled spitting a little in my face and then I caught his eyes going to my chest. Nasty mother fucker

"old man I will do whatever I please, don't f*****g spit on me and as for my clothes..." I trailed of pretending to inspect myself "I'm wearing a leather jacket, a skirt and a crop top" I slowly spell it out for him.

Just as he was about to give me a come back to the bell ending the first period rang and the hall started to become crowded. I took this opportunity to sneak away and get to class before I end up getting a detention.

Lucky for me my next class was maths with Mrs. McGregor. When I got to class, I opened the door to find almost everyone was already there. f*****g early people and Taylor. I ignored everyone's astonished looks, walking over to the back of the classroom to an empty seat near the window.

Their eyes followed me like a predator stalking prey including Mrs. McGregor and Taylor. Brandon the school's 'hottie' was practically drooling like the dog that he is. Still, I continued to ignore them and took my seat behind Taylor.

She kept looking back at me each time more frustrated because I didn't acknowledge her presence. I knew exactly what she wanted, and I wasn't in the mood to answer all her f*****g questions.

After class I walked straight out as soon as the bell rung not giving Taylor a chance to initiate a conversation. But did that stop her? No. I sure know how to pick them.

She speed-walked her way in front of me grabbed my hand and dragged me to the janitor's closet closing the door behind us. We both crossed our arms daring one another to start talking. After what felt like an eternity, she finally broke into a chorus of delightfully colorful words.

"b***h I don't know what the f**k you think your scrawny ass is playing at but you better use that god-given mouth to form a f*****g sentence before I shove my fist down your f*****g throat"

Silence

"oh are you mute now, did something happen to your f*****g brain in the week you decided to go a wall on me"

Silence

"motherfucker you know what fuc-" I cut her off throwing my arms around her as I felt the tears escape

"I'm so sorry I- I it hurts so bad" I sobbed into her. I don't know what it is about her, but I can never keep some things from her. Anything even if it's just who had the last slice of pizza.

"Hey hey, it's okay I know baby I know it's hard" she cooed in a much softer tone which only made it more painful. She rubbed my back in soothing circles hugging me tightly.

We must have stayed like that in the janitors' closet for a long time because by the time we pulled away, it was lunch already.

God, I can't believe I sat in there crying my eyes out for an hour in my best friend's arms. She didn't even ask any question just held me knowing that I wasn't in the mood to talk. When did I get so lucky?

She held my face at arm's length watching me with a deciphering look,

"what?" I smiled looking at her.

She started laughing like the maniac she is. "what the actual fuck.... you look like... the dictionary definition of ugly right now, you make the s**t at the bottom of my shoe look like a baby between Beyoncé and the rock" she managed to speak between what sounded like an injured dolphin trying to laugh.

"Oh, shut up... at least I don't look like this 24/7 unlike you, you fugly rotten ass potato trash face" I replied offended trying to hold back my laughter as my best friend was dying.

Fuck now that I think about it, I was wearing eye makeup. I probably look like Gollum from the lord of the rings.

After she finished her suicide attempt, she offered to help fix my make up in the bathroom considering she always had a 'just in case' make up bag with her. Surprisingly she even had my shade of foundation in it.

Some people would think that was creepy but hey, you never know when you could end up crying for 1 hour straight and ruin your make up.

I sat on the sink top in the girl's bathroom as Taylor started to work on my face. She was fast, so we were done in about 10 minutes and we were off to lunch.

I hopped off and turned to look at myself in the mirror and looked even better than before. I was about to thank her, but she beat it.

"your welcome b***h now can we go eat please". I smiled at her and helped her pack up her stuff up so we can eat

We sat at our usual lunch table where martin was nowhere to be found. He would normally wait for us, but I guess they broke up. "so, what happened to martin?"

She looked up from her stale cafeteria salad and her face had a sadistic smile. "I found his balls deep in Janessa last Friday, so I kicked his balls and lit his car on fire" she reminisced her smirk growing wider at the memory.

"it was a lovely day"

I just laughed at her craziness. She is my idol.

"Should have guessed, last time with Jacob you had your brother leave him naked in the middle of the wilderness"

"oh, s**t I almost forgot about that" she laughed a little too loud.

"your one crazy mother fucker you know that right" I started laughing with her.

"hey, he deserved it, he was talking s**t about my only friend" she defended herself raising her hands and shrugging.

"I honestly don't know how you keep getting all these men, after all, you have done"

"Neither do I but maybe they like the craziness within me" I was about to reply when I felt someone tap on my shoulder.

I turned to see non-other than prick face himself Michael Black. My smile instantly turned to a scowl. "what the f**k do you want?" my voice was so cold and emotionless, it was honestly scary.

He shifted nervously on one foot and rubbed the back of his head giving me a nervous smile. "um... I came to apologize about err... tripping you last week" he stuttered out.

Shit was I really that scary right now. Dayum gurl, I'm proud of myself, I adjusted my body slightly to face him and crossed my arms. Damn, he is tall.

I was face to face with his lower stomach. Lol, it looks like I'm going to suck his d**k or something. I felt a smile start to form on my lips, but I suppressed it and looked up at him.

"Okay..." I dragged out. "apology not accepted, go back to your table of buddies and leave me alone" and with that, I turned to my original position facing Taylor who seemed to be enjoying this way too much.

Sadly, instead of taking a hint he just sat done on the empty seat next to me and I could feel his eyes on me. Wait why is he even bothering to apologize this time, it's not like this was the first time he'd done that.

After a few seconds of silence and staring, I broke the silence, "what is happening here?" I asked turning to face him.

"I'm not leaving until you accept my apology and agree to go out with me". To say I was shocked was an understatement.

Hmm let me just consider my options for a second. "yeah no that's not happening in this lifetime" I got up and walked away Taylor by my side.

When we turned a corner, I looked to my side to find a very smiley girl about to pop. She squeals as we walked toward the stairs.

"b***h I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST SHOT DOWN POSSIBLY THE HOTTEST GUY IN THE UNIVERSE LIKE THAT"

"first of all, the rock will always be the hottest guy in the universe and no earthly male will be able to change that and secondly, what do you mean hot, that rat-faced f**k doesn't even come close to beating Chris Hemsworth let alone the rock"

"well true but he is the hottest guy in school so..."

"he is not my type and changes the subject right now"

"dang ok...oh wait I almost forgot" she reached into her bag and pulled out her locker key before walking towards her locker. I followed her curious about what she was going to retrieve.

She pulled out a big royal blue gift bag and handed it to me." what's this?" I smiled looking down to find so many different things a pair of black and blue skull headphones, a new phone and a laptop.

"I know what happened to your parent's sweetie" I looked up at her with a confused face not saying anything. "And I assume you haven't looked at the news lately. I'm so sorry for your loss baby girl" she continued. Wait. is she talking about my...omg we were on the news. "Before they passed away, they told me to save these things for your birthday to surprise you on Tuesday at your birthday party..." I tuned her out after that trying to calm my suddenly ragging breaths. Holy s**t I think I'm having a panic attack.

It was getting harder to breathe, the room started to spin, and Taylor's voice became fainter. I felt my self-slipping away from reality. The last thing I remember was Taylor screaming my name and someone's arms wrapping around my waist tight so didn't fall.