014 || Subtle Awakening
1182 Words
EMBER
I felt out of place in the private dining hall. Azai sat at the head of the long table like a king on his throne, his long black hair shining, his crimson eyes fixed on the parchment in his hand. Deonne sat gracefully to his right in her pristine white robes. I took the seat across from her, as far from Azai as the table allowed.
I couldn't look at him.
Every time my gaze even drifted near his face, Liora's words sliced through me again.
My stomach churned restlessly. Bile rose in my throat, but I forced it down and reached for the food instead.
There were roasted meat, warm bread, and spiced vegetables. Everything smelled divine.
I shovelled it in without tasting it, bite after frantic bite, as if eating fast enough could outrun the guilt digging into my insides.
"Ember," Deonne said gently, tilting her head. "Are you alright, child? You look pale."
I didn't answer. I just kept eating, tears slipping down my cheeks and dripping onto the plate. My throat burned. My core throbbed with every small shift in my chair, a brutal reminder of last night.
A sob tried to escape. I choked it down with another huge mouthful of meat.
"Slow down," Azai said.
I ignored him. Couldn't breathe near him.
The food lodged suddenly in my throat.
Gasping, I dropped my fork with a clatter and banged my fist hard against my chest, my eyes watering. I couldn't cough it out. My vision blurred as I continued to choke.
In an instant, Azai was beside me.
Strong, icy hands gripped my shoulders as he pulled me upright. One arm wrapped around my waist from behind while the other pressed firmly just below my sternum. Then he jerked me.
"Breathe," he ordered, his voice laced with urgency.
He jerked me thrice, and the piece of meat dislodged. I coughed hard, gasping for air as tears streamed down my face.
Suddenly drained beyond reason, I collapsed back against his chest, shaking uncontrollably. For one pathetic moment I let myself lean into him, sobbing into the fabric of his shirt. His soothing scent wrapped around me, making me cry even harder.
Azai stiffened, his entire body going rigid beneath me.
I pulled back just enough to look up at him through wet lashes. His crimson eyes were wide and stormy with confusion. He looked like he wanted to say a thousand things and couldn't decide on any of them.
"I'm sorry," I whispered tearfully, my voice hoarse. "I'm so sorry."
I pushed away from him, shrinking into my chair. Azai's hands hovered in the air for a second before he let them drop. A deep frown carved between his brows as he slowly returned to his seat, watching me.
Deonne observed us both with those eerie violet eyes, saying nothing for a long moment.
Finally, she spoke. "Have you had any more visions since that night in the execution chamber, Ember?"
I shook my head, wiping at my wet cheeks with trembling fingers. "No. Nothing."
Azai's gaze bore into the side of my face. "What did you see that night?" He asked.
I swallowed hard, staring down at my half-eaten plate. The memory flooded back, making me shiver.
My hands fisted in my lap.
"I saw... death," I whispered. "Red skies. Fire. Wolves dying everywhere. And you..." My voice cracked. "You were on your knees. Someone drove a blade through your heart. You... you stopped moving."
Silence hung heavily over the table.
Azai's expression didn't change, but I felt the temperature in the room drop several degrees. His fingers tightened around the stem of his goblet until I thought the crystal might shatter.
Deonne leaned forward slightly, her voice soft. "And the blade? Did you see who held it?"
I shook my head again, fresh tears threatening. "It was too fast."
Azai exhaled sharply through his nose. He looked away towards the tall windows, his jaw locked tight.
I wanted to ask him about everything, about Liora's cruel revelation, and the terrifying possibility that the vision I saw wasn't prophecy... but memory. But the words stuck in my throat like the meat had moments ago.
Suddenly, heavy footsteps echoed from the corridor. A young messenger burst into the dining hall, breathing hard, his face pale.
"Alpha!" he gasped, dropping to one knee. "Urgent news from the eastern border. Raiders breached the Veil. The patrols are requesting immediate reinforcements."
Azai's expression hardened instantly. He rose without hesitation, his untouched plate of food forgotten. The chair scraped loudly against the stone floor.
"Prepare my horse," he ordered, his voice cold and commanding. "I ride out in five minutes."
His crimson eyes darted to me for the briefest second before he turned and strode out, the messenger hurrying after him. The heavy doors slammed shut behind them, leaving only the crackling hearth and the weight of Deonne's violet gaze on me.
I stared at Azai's empty seat, the full plate of food mocking me. He hadn't even touched it.
Deonne watched me quietly for a long moment, then she spoke with gentle care.
"Is there something you wish to say to him, Ember?"
My hands trembled in my lap. I pressed them together, trying to steady myself.
"I don't know what's real anymore," I whispered, my voice cracking. "He says I seduced him. That I betrayed him. That I tried to kill our son... and now Liora tells me I stabbed him in the heart with a poisoned dagger. That I am the reason he's freezing from the inside out."
I let out a shaky, bitter laugh that sounded more like a sob.
"Yet when he touches me... when I'm with him... it doesn't feel like we are enemies. It feels like I've been searching for him my whole life. Like I belonged to him long before I woke up in that cell."
Fresh tears slipped down my cheeks. I wiped them away angrily.
"Deonne... please tell me the truth. Was I forced into marrying Azai? Did someone make me his wife against my will?"
Deonne's expression softened, but her violet eyes held a depth of sorrow.
"No, child," she said softly. "You were not forced. You chose Azai. Willingly. Passionately. The bond between you two was one of the strongest the goddess has blessed in centuries. You loved him... and he loved you with a devotion that terrified even his own pack."
My breath hitched. Another tear fell onto the tablecloth.
"Then why?" I choked out. "Why would I destroy everything? Why would I stab the man I called my midnight?"
“No one has the answer, Ember. Only you. All you can try to do for now is to fix what you broke.”
Her words sank in steadily. She was right. If I could get an antidote for Azai’s poison…if I could save our child…maybe I could lessen the damage. If I could stop the future from happening…
“What do I do?” I blurted out breathlessly. “How do I get more visions?”
- Writer
