10 Chapters about HIM

Chapter 4

Classes began shortly after that. I told myself that I would now reveal my affections for him. It was Monday, and I texted him to say we'd meet up. But because there was no response, I became even more enraged, and I suspect he was avoiding me. He responded a few hours later, apologizing for not responding immediately because he was too busy with schoolwork; we would meet on Tuesday afternoon. I'm much more irritated since I wanted to meet him right now. But I can't help but wait till Tuesday. After that terrible prom, I saw certain changes in myself. At the same time, I'm envious and insecure. Perhaps it is simply a part of growing up, in my opinion. Allison also told me, "Girl, you've changed recently, I'm not sure what it is, but if there's anything upsetting you, please tell." I really wanted to tell her what was going on with me, but perhaps not just now. "Don't worry, I'm alright." It was recess time, so Allison and I headed to the cafeteria to get some snacks. I miss him and wished to see him. My mind is filled with pictures of Lhuyd. I can't focus, and I can't even eat well. I think I'm going insane. Is this how it actually feels to be in love?

It was finally Tuesday, and I am quite happy to meet him today. Finally, I can tell him how I feel. Because I'll go insane if I don't tell him right now. It should have happened yesterday. When I got at school, I quickly contacted him, saying, "Hey, good morning, what time should we meet up?" I did not receive a response. Oh, why is he acting like this? He used to always text me. But now I feel ghosted, he replies a few hours later. I despise this, bruhhhh. After a few moments, he responded to my text message. Megan meet at McDonald's, and we'll see you there. I'm relieved after hearing his message. I went directly to McDonald's once the lesson ended. Lhuyd was already inside, but his face was sad. I approached him and smiled. His expression seems unwelcoming, as if he doesn't want to see me right now. Lhuyd, how are you? Are you all right? I inquired about him. I'm OK, but could you just tell me why you want to meet up? Please hurry since I have a lot things to do, he remarked. The tone of his voice became annoyed, so I said, "I was just here to tell you something important, you know, you've been on my mind since I met you." I have feelings for you, Lhuyd, and I believe you have as well; you're just too shy to tell me, which is why I was encouraged to tell you first. I mentioned that I could feel my face heating up. He froze after hearing what I said and said, "WHAT?" Megan, are you serious? Do you honestly believe that? Is this a joke? Tell me, he laughed so loudly. I was outraged by what he had just said, "No Lhuyd, it's true, I've been going insane recently because of you."

You see, Megan, I like you because you're polite and smart. We get along well, but I don't have any special feelings for you; you're simply a friend to me. I apologize for making you feel that way; I didn't intend it.

What? I'm not sure I understand. So you're simply messing with me? I questioned him, trying to fight back my tears. No, I'm just being kind to you, Megan; it's not my fault that you're upset. What the hell are you doing playing with my feelings? After saying that, I walk out and leave.

Mannnn!!!! I despise today. I was crying as I walked home. I honestly can't put into words how I feel right now. He was the worst guy I'd ever met after what he said to me. Perhaps because he caused me pain. I still can't believe what he did to me, those unique things he did to me. That was all a ruse. I despise myself, I hate myself for falling for his charm. I didn't believe in myself. I assumed far too strongly that he had feelings for me. I am positive that I will get through this. While crying, I told myself.