Compelled

9. Forging new relations

We ate in silence which wasn't really awkward just comforting. The night was perfect, not too warm or cold. We dined on the balcony and I was thankful for that since the space was much needed after a mind numbing day.

I dabbed my lips with a napkin that came along with the food. The man across me lounged peacefully and with a quenched hunger. As much as I felt the need to maintain a distance and inconvenience him no more, I couldn't help but feel some sort of gratitude towards him. Not only for having helped my family before but also for being there for me today.

He was a busy man who didn't need to do all of that. Yet, he still did and I didn't thank him for that.

Justin straightened in his seat, smoothing out his shirt before he stood up. I took that as this evening was done and rose turning for the door that lead back into the house.

"I didn't reject you, Scarlett." He said after a heavy sigh. My back was facing him and when he spoke I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment because I didn't want to deal with this right now.

"It's-" he paused, sighing again. "Just think of it as staying away from something you know you can't do justice to." I frowned at the heaviness of his voice. Turning slowly, I watched his face for several moments. There was something aside from this confession, something more deeper that was troubling him and causing a storm in the depths of his eyes.

As I was analyzing him, he neared me purposefully until he stood a pace away. I pondered what he had said and a part of me understood while the other part of me screamed ' If he really wanted to, nothing would stop him.'

But then again, I was thankful for the truthfulness and that he was being straight up instead of toying with me but I really just had one question.

"So, that's seriously it then. You're just going to play around with as many woman as you can and never serious up at all?" I didn't ask that because of any personal benefit but just genuine curiosity. "I mean it isn't like I have any intention to deter that but it's simply curiosity."

I mean I get that some chose to never commit and that was their decision and usually it was because of observations of their parents relationship or something much more but from what I knew, his parents had a good relation and his mom still mourns his father which only added to my confusion of his decision.

He was stunned for a moment and when he recovered, an unexplainable pain coiled in his eyes almost as if he was recalling a past incident.

He shook his head like he was trying to expel something from his mind. "I- my decision for not committing to a woman,-" he paused and his eyes swept over my face. "No matter how tempting, is because I don't want to leave behind what my dad did."

My forehead creased in confusion. I knew his dad died a bit young and that he was murdered but I still didn't catch what he was saying. Justin read the confusion that displayed on my face and this time he held my hands in his. I shivered at his touch but couldn't dwell on it at such a moment.

"I saw what his death did to my mother. Watched every single day as she withered away into a cocoon. She needed counselling for an entire year and still she wasn't half as well as she was before." He took in a breath to steady himself.

I guess now I knew why he made that decision. He didn't want to leave another woman in the state his dad left his mother.

"Should anything happen to me, like it did my dad, then I don't want to leave behind a woman who would suffer from the strength of her emotion and all because she loved me." At this point, my heart swelled with secondhand pain and understanding of what he had to witness.

''I understand now, Justin." I removed my hand from his hold and cupped his cheek but he shook his head.

"You don't. Nobody truly does." He sighed tiredly before continuing. "It's only normal and obvious for a woman to want a family and it would be selfish of me to deprive her of that. I've had to bear with the pain of losing my father and it was the hardest thing I've had to deal with." He didn't say anything after that but I grasped his reason.

He just didn't want to repeat what happened to his mom and him to someone else. He was determined to stick to that even if it meant fighting the temptation of having a family.

I nodded as a way of telling him that I truly understood. He let go of my hand but didn't move away from me. "So now you know it wasn't rejection. It was protection." His voice was soft begging me to believe him.

"I can't flirt or mess with a woman like you." I raised a brow at that. He scoffed but his expression was still sombre. "You're made for love and commitment, Scarlett. I don't want to ruin that." I smiled at him this time, a real full blown smile. I knew my cheeks were turning a hint of pink from the warmth that settled in them.

I took in a breath to lighten the mood since it was all tense. "And all this time I thought it was my hair." I said with pursed lips. He laughed lightly, all his torturous emotions gone and that made me happy to see him laugh and at that moment I knew my heart was in grave danger.

He was a good person, a good son and good man. No wonder all of them wanted more because he wasn't just some egotistical rich person. He was a gentleman and so much more.

It was getting late and the more time I stayed here I found myself feeling like a fly being drawn towards the light and I knew that light would only burn but before I left I had to tell him something.

He was staring at me intently, eyes focusing on my every movement. "I didn't get the chance to thank you today for being there. For putting up with me being a cry baby and ruining your shirt." He brushed it off with a wave of his hand dismissively.

"You forget that I was once a cry baby in your arms at the medical centre not too long back." He said with a wink and I knew he was speaking about the time his mother had a cardiac arrest.

I shrugged then said goodnight and turned to leave for the second time tonight.

The morning that followed was a mixture of relief and also distress. Relief since my dad filled me in that the doctor said it wouldn't be that difficult to remove the tumor. I sighed with that relief and thanked the heavens for this good news.

However, the distress came along when my phone pinged with the tone set for my email. The payment breakdown stipulated all costs from the doctors fees right down to the hospital payment needed in advance.

I paced the length of my room still in my pajamas when my dad called to say that he couldn't find anyone who wanted to assist him and that didn't surprise me since no one would willingly lend such a huge amount of money to a fallen businessman who was now labeled untrustworthy.

He let out an uneasy breath. "Maybe we could ask Mr Pearson for help." My dad suggested hesitantly. Justin wouldn't even hesitate to bear the expenses but that just felt like we were taking advantage of him and besides we still had time to find someone to help and I didn't plan on asking him for help until absolutely nothing came up.

"Dad, I don't think it would be a good-" his phone beeped for a second indicating an incoming call which cut me off.

"I will call you back." He said hurriedly before disconnecting the call. Closing my eyes and breathing in deeply I headed for a quick shower before changing and making my way to the medical centre. It was my last week of work here and then another week of rest and then the big move but I guess that depended now on the operation and recovery of my mother.

The elevator to the second floor opened and I got out only to be grabbed into a tight hug by Jenna. " I thought you fled the country without seeing me first." She joked, letting me go then continued to smile at me.

"I'm wounded that you think that I would actually do that." I placed my hand over my heart for dramatic effect.

She wacked me on the arm then narrowed her eyes at me. "Where has your a*s been lost? I've been like a lost puppy without you."

My fingers knotted anxiously in front of me and Jenna knew something was up. I explained to her the turmoil and issues that I was facing and that the financial constraints and she helpfully said she'd see if her husband could assist me.

I smiled appreciatively at her. "Thank you so much, Jenna. That truly means a lot." And it did even if her husband couldn't assist but the fact that she offered meant a lot.

I put on my white coat and placed my stethoscope around the collar. "You're needed for an open heart surgery in five minutes with doctor Russo." One of the two nurses who were fangirling over Justin said from the doorway before leaving.

The excitement built up in my chest. I've never seen an open heart surgery done live aside from, you know, videos they show you in med school. So I hurriedly went to the operating room where I found Dr Russo who I thanked for this opportunity.

Quickly changing and prepping all the equipment needed, the operation began and it was a tense few hours. Dr Russo gave me tips and little pointers along the way. Once the major aspects were done successfully and with careful precision, Dr Russo allowed me to do the stitching and to say I was thrilled would be an understatement.

The procedure took so long that by the time we left the room and the patient was moved to recover, I only had an hour remaining which was filled with emergency room guests with a broken finger, a fish hook launched into a nostril and one kid with a dog bite on her arm.

The fees of emergency patients always went to whichever doctor who did it. Which meant the only cash trainees made were from the patients they've seen to without assistance. It made sense since the major stuff were usually done by professionals who asked us to assist. All that being said, once the training status changed to professional then the opportunities were broad.

Opening the door of my car I got it just as my phoned buzzed. "An old friend of mines came through." He said but he still wasn't ecstatic but I assumed it was because of the strain to obviously pay back the money.

I, on the other hand, was overjoyed. If his friend was loaning us the funds then the worry would be put to rest provided that the operation was successful. "Then we're all set. I'm sure I'll be able to earn the money in a few months after moving to Greece and start my own practice."

He was silent for a second and then I heard him let out a huff. "That's all good, Scarlett, but he asks of something in return." The car behind me honked impatiently.

"I'm sure we can do that much since he's assisting us so greatly." He muttered a wait but I really couldn't since I really was holding up traffic. "I'm trying to drive right now. Just agree to whatever your friend asks and get the money deposited to the doctor so they can start as soon as possible." I hung up then got moving on the road, apologising to the angry driver as she passed me.

A few days went by and it was surprisingly more hectic than I'd have hoped. In between hospital visits, work and getting things sorted out for the move to greece there was hardly any time to do anything else. My father was rarely seen and every time I phoned him he'd just brush my call of and I assumed it was because he was trying to look for payment options to return his friends money.

His friend had already deposited the money into dad's account. The operation day was set for tomorrow and much to my relief my mother did seem to be better. Better in the sense that her health wasn't deteriorating. Aside from the headache that accompanied the tumor, she never complained.

Justin was had been busy as well in these few days but we always unwinded with a cup of coffee and each other's company at the end of the day either in the terrace or out on the balcony. The more time that I spent with him it wasn't hard for me to miss that he was unintentionly winning my affection. I was warming up to him more than I would have liked but he didn't shun away from it. In fact, he seemed to be enjoying it more than he even noticed but deep down, I knew that is all we'd be.

A hopeless romantic and a person who didn't want to commit was a recipe for ultimate disaster. So every time I felt that I was slipping, I reminded myself of everything. His feelings and opinion and why we could never be. That reminder caused a heaviness in my chest but I ignored it and although it didn't completely fade, it did damper down.

I parked outside the little cottage like house my father was renting for his short stay here. He wasn't returning any of my calls and I didn't see him for the day visits at the hospitals but my mom said he dropped by at the evenings and seemed rather stressed out and quieter than usual.

I knocked on the door twice and when no answer came I tapped my knuckles on the door again and this time the door opened. Vague voices became hushed and eventually to a halt but I didn't see anyone yet. His forehead was sporting a frown which only became more profound when he saw me.

The confusion grew on me quick since this wasn't like his usual self. "It's good to see you too, Dad. Do you mind if I come in?" He hesitated but stepped aside allowing me to enter and while my eyes picked up the mediocre interior they couldn't focus there for too long because my attention was scooped up by the two men dressed in well tailor made suits.

The one guy standing to my left was elderly but well kept and with a whiskey in his hand. However, the man sitting on the chair beside him was young, fairly good-looking and also well kept. Neither of them reacted at my entrance, not a flinch nor a movement.

I smiled at them formally then eyed my father whose expression was unreadable. He cleared his throat before carrying out the introduction.

"Scarlett, this is Mr Wright, the friend I've been telling you about, and his son, Chase." I smiled again cordially and this time they didn't quiet smiled it it was more of a tilt of their lips. At that moment I knew I was being closely observed by these two men.

"Gentlemen, this is my daughter, Scarlett." My dad held my hand in his and drew us closer to where these men were seated.

The older man faced us with a now significant smile on his face. "Please, call me Julian." His voice was booming with power and pride. "After all, we are to be family."

My eyes snapped to my father who just looked away. I knew this was the man that was loaning us the money and he did mention that Julian wanted a favor in return. I also remembered telling my father to agree to whatever they say.

I swallowed the lump in my throat, refusing to believe what I was hearing and the implication that went with it. "T-thank you so much for your assistance, Mr Wright." I said and he smiled boastfully. "But I, this won't be done." His triumphant smile fell only to be replaced with a hard set lip and narrowing eyes.

I turned to leave nodding to the elderly man all the while refusing to look at his son but who I knew was watching me intently.

"This is just not done, Dan!" Julians' voice boomed angrily stopping me in my tracks. "You have until the end of today to fix your act. I'm a busy man who doesn't have time to waste. My time is money."

I rolled my eyes before leaving, shutting the door behind me. Storming towards my car, I jerkily got in and headed for to the hospital. I found a parking spot close to the entrance but I never got out of my car.

I hit the steering multiple times and realized that I was crying. The tears were flowing non-stop and I felt so disgustingly helpless. Not accepting the small price for my mother's life was the most selfish decision I'd ever had to make and I hated it.

Why? Why couldn't things be different? If my father wasn't reckless to begin with we'd be okay and not at the mercy of others. I shook my head furiously admonishing myself for picking on that.

I sniffed then blinked many times to clear my vision and after crying a s**t load again, I cleaned myself up and got out of the car and aimlessly walked into the hospital.

"What happened?" My mother's soft voice inquired as I entered her ward. I smiled but I knew it didn't reach my eyes and she saw it too.

I shook my head. "It's nothing, Mom." The last thing she needed now was knowing her family didn't have the cash for her operation and her daughter was too selfish to make a sacrifice for her life. "I just missed you today."

She held my hand weakly and smiled as best she could. "I know you're worried about me, Scarlett, but I don't want you to burden yourself with grief and dwell on whatever the future holds for me." I looked at her being so selfless. Putting my life before hers and that's what she always did.

I blinked the tears that started anew and looked away from her feeling so horrible about myself. "Hey, don't worry about me. I'm going to be alright. The operation will be done soon and with success. I just know it. So don't go putting yourself down because of me." I nodded more her than myself because I hated myself at this moment.

I couldn't blame my father because he tried to explain to me the favor but I was so over joyed about finding a loaner that I didn't care about the repercussions until they were known.

"There we go. One cappuccino, two sugars with a daisy decoration as per request." My head snapped up at the warm voice that made my chest swell and eyes blurry again.

He looked surprised to see me and once the surprise wore off, he watched me with a frown marring his forehead. Justin knew something was wrong but for the sake of my mother, he kept quiet and didn't probe. He narrowed his eye at me then plastered a smile in his lips and handed the cup to my mother who smiled at him with so much of love and greatfulness.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him while taking in his jean and blue shirt clad body. He raised a brow at me then settled on the other side of my mother.

"He's been here for almost an hour now." My mother said with a tender emotion in her eye. She was getting fond if him too and I couldn't blame her. I was just shocked and surprised that he was here. A busy man like him and here he was, bringing my mother cappuccino.

I watched him as he spoke with my mother, telling her silly jokes and sharing little life delimmas with her and she absolutely enjoyed it. A part if me wanted to cross the room, hug him and cry my heart out but again, I reminded myself of what could never be and stayed put.

My heart stopped when he turned and caught me staring at him. He flashed me a short smile but it disappeared quickly. He was watching me watch him as intently as I was and his eyes softened but they held a warning in them too. A warning that I needed to keep constant reminder of.

I stood up to leave, telling my mother I had some stuff to attend too then left. As I walked back to my car I fished my phone out of my bag and pressed the most recent number on my call list.

My mother's selflessness flooded my head as my Dad answered the call. Justin's piercing cautious eyes filled my mind and stabbed my chest.

I bit back a sob before saying what I intended to. "Get Mr Julian on the phone and tell him we have ourselves a wedding."