My behavior afterwards was more than wrong. I know that, and I have no idea why I didn't listen—I wanted to marry you. Then I couldn't believe that you didn't remember anything, and even the memory of our eyes meeting in the bar was gone because of the drugs. You weren't like other women, and I wanted to get closer to you, but I kept putting it off and somehow time slipped away. I never assumed that you had been abused. My mother and sister kept telling me how unsociable you were and how much you bossed everyone around. Whenever I thought I was getting over it, something else was whispered to me. You can't imagine how much I wanted to kick myself.
Then you were gone, and when I found out what had happened to you,“ — a deep breath can be heard — ”I could have kicked myself. So I tried to f
