Why Humans Make Bad Pets!

What did I do to piss God or whoever off so badly I

Captain YecTal sat on his bridge, comfortable for the first time since this mission had started. UtMot had apparently been successful in his mission, seeing as how his shuttle was even now being stowed in his ship's hold. He had to admit, his engineer's had been right. This old ship was still suited to this kind of task. The Robalin may not be known for their ship's weaponry, but when it came to bio-weapons and stealth they were some of the best.

"Shuttle is docked Captain," reported BecMeq. He was new, and overenthusiastic, but he knew what he was doing. "Eraser team on are entering the cargo bay."

"That will be fine, Ensign. There's no need for me to know what order they are entering the shuttle."

"Sorry sir."

"Sir." Commander VulHam's voice issued from the bridge's speakers. YecTal sighed. Couldn't his crew do anything without his guiding them through every single step?

"Go ahead." YecTal groaned.

"Our sensors were right. The shuttle seems to have gone through heavy systems failure before it reached us."

"Any idea why?"

"None that I can tell sir. We'll open it up and . . . hold on . . . what the f**k is he doing! We need to fly in that thing!"

"Excuse me commander, what's happeni-" sudden screams and curses issued from the speakers.

"He just flew out of the shuttle"! "Take cover"! "Back up back u- oh s**t"!

"What's happening someone tell me what's going on! Ensign, give me video feed of the cargo bay!"

"Video feeds went down when we got too close to that solar flair. The engineer's haven't fixed them in the cargo bay yet."

"Well get me something I don't care! Thermal imaging, UV anythi-" a voice that was doing something other than swearing or screaming leapt out of the speakers.

"It was that creature UtMot was supposed to be bringing in sedated! It's up and it killed UtMot and now it's killing everyone in the boarding party! It has a f*****g Fusion Sword!" A tell-tale scream issued from the speakers. "He just took out WilHelm!" the voice shouted. "We keep hitting it and doesn't die! It doesn't even slow down! We're just pissing it off, we need back u-" the transmission cut into static. The bridge was silent with fear. YecTal couldn't allow it to show, although he himself was frightened. UtMot had said he knew the correct dose of sedative! Now he botched up and dropped demonspawn into his cargo bay!

Controlling his fear and anger, YecTal stood up, allowing his men to see him proud and tall. Calm. "We were prepared for this eventuality. Everyone get on your combat harnesses. Officers arm yourselves with the anti-tank pulse-guns. Flood every compartment of the ship with Yavim-8, I don't care if it won't do any good." Thankfully every member of the crew had been given immunity to the deadly virus Yavim-8. UtMot had expounded in length upon the creatures incredible immune system, but every little bit would help. Besides, it couldn't be completely impervious.

"Ensign, set a course out of this star system. I don't want to be detected while we're dealing with this mess. Once we've cleaned it up we'll come back and deal with the crew still left on the station."

"Where should I set it, sir"? Gosh darn it. Had he not said out of this star system?

"I don't care!" YecTal roared. "Set it for the other side of the galaxy for all I care, we'll be done with this in two hocs (5 minutes) anyway!"

Turning on his heal, YecTal, already in his advanced Mark V combat-harness with personal security-field and shield - a gift from his wife - plugged the anti-tank pulse-rifle he had set aside for himself. Adjusting the sheath of his ceremonial Fusion Scythe, although he might have to use it soon, he set to trying to clean up the mess UtMot had left for him.

The first corridor I entered outside the cargo bay was empty. That boded well for d**k's theory that there might not necessarily be a full crew compliment. I sprinted towards what I was pretty sure was the bow of the ship when something that looked like steam started issuing from air vents in the ceiling. I couldn't escape the colossal amount of it, but it didn't seem to hurt me, so I just ignored it. It screwed with my visibility though. I suddenly wished I wasn't carrying a glowing sword. I turned it off, running as quietly as I could. A noise up ahead made me pause and crouch, willing myself to become one with the steam. I suddenly wished I'd taken Yoga or something.

A group of 5 appeared out of the steam in front of me, but didn't shout in alarm the moment they rounded the corner. They couldn't see me! Yet. One of them had a significantly larger ray gun, to the point that it had to be supported by a shoulder strap rather than have him lifting it only with his arms like the other in the group were doing with their smaller counterparts. Not wanting to lose my advantage, I leapt at the one with the big gun, turning on my lava sword and bellowing as I flew through the air. I landed 50 centimeters in front of him and laid about me with my sword like a infant given a wooden spoon whilst playing with his siblings. In case you were an only child, I basically just whacked everyone over the head with it, but when you're using a lava sword instead of a spoon, it's rather effective.

The small group never stood a chance, as they were too close together and too unaware of my pretense to be of any real danger. The problem arose when another group heard the commotion and entered the fray before I'd finished up with the first group. I was finishing up with the only remaining member of the first group when he was liquified and a massive energy pulse shot through him and took me in the waist. At least, it would have had I not been wearing the lovely personal shield d**k had given me. I wasn't wearing it for long. He had been right about it's capacity, the thing shorted out after one hit, at least I think that's what the smoke and sparks meant. It didn't matter though, they had kept me from getting hit by one pulse, and that was all I needed.

I jump-flew in a zig-zag patter, avoiding the shots they threw at me. They were so slow, they always seemed to be shooting at where I had been a second ago. I felt like a movie action hero but in real life. Once again I went for the one with the anti-tank ray gun first, then finished off the auxiliaries. They kept making these convenient little clumps for me, all I had to do was swipe around with the lava sword a few times and I had nearly gotten everyone one way or another.

The next hallway had another group of five which I finished off in the same way, except for one little guy armed only with a pistol - poor bloke - who broke away from the main group, which earned him a quick sprint and the failure of one of the doors in the hallway that he tried to use as a barrier. I don't know what they make spaceship door hinges out of, but they need to find a better alternative.

The next room was a common lounge like the one in the cargo ship, except it was significantly larger and had a group of 10 ant-lizards spread out in a semi-circle around the door I'd just come through, all waiting for me, their guns pointed straight at my chest. Dang, this one was going to require a lot of jumping.