Never an Ever After

8 years

NO PROMISES-SHAYNE WARD

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

RONAN

7th of August, Year 2008

8 years have passed.

Time flies so fast, one day I am a 10-year old boy scared and scarred. Now, I am an 18-year-old man who has nothing to fear but feared.

Adolescent hot me so hard. I learn to do things I promise I wouldn’t do when I am in my 10 year. The town has me as a football quarterback along with James. Together were indestructible and we f*****g own the next generation’s Nashville. And we both know it.

Football. Parties. Girls. Cars. Power. Fight Club.

This is where our life circled in eight long years. Our circle even went bigger because of the football team, but Cloud is in the other dimension, he's in photography. And it's fine, he's still our f*****g friend. Nothing changed.

Dad become so distant and even more ruthless in his governance. But people still chose to vote for him despite they feared him most. Maybe that’s why, they feared him that’s why they still vote for him. I know what kind of a man my father is and I have learnt about it as time went on, and I know why people feared him because they should. They don’t have a choice.

Mom has her own business running in Nashville too, she has this dance studio that Ellora used to go to everyday. Mom and Ellora becomes closed and the view are surreal having the two women in my life loves each other dearly.

In exchange for my aging, Ellora is also aging. And if adolescent hits me hard, Ellora hits it so f*****g hard. So painfully beautiful and pure even for me.

She still has this icy cold glare but sunshine smile. A long dark velvet hair that hits the f*****g curve of her body. Her hair is so long that she looks like an angel comes down here on earth, so f*****g serene and angelic. Her skin is still pale white but is now glistening with moisture. Her f*****g body is no other, so f*****g out of this world. Small waist and petite. She grows up as a very beautiful girl. She grew up that every man who sees her will kneel in front o her. She grew up to be every man’s temptation and sensation. A f*****g walking lusts.

But she doesn’t even know it. She’s still innocent and pure because I made sure that she is.

You know, I am a man and I know the mindset of my fellow man. Every time they look at Ellora, even a dingle f*****g glanced her way or breath the same air she has I know how far their brains have been running. So, I am cutting them off. I used my f*****g power so that no one would approach Ellora. Because she's mine and no one will try to take away what is mine because I am Ronan Hawthorne. Feared and Indestructible. It has been that way for eight years.

She still making me weal every time she glanced my way, but despite of remembering the face of the lady in the red shoes, all I hear is the clink of her heels walking. That is why I still hadn’t spoken a single word to the girl I am obsessed with.

Yes, obsessed. I call myself that in all glory.

At night, when I still can’t sleep, I have been watching her at her window.

Watching her sleeps, watching her reads, watching her study, watching her dance, watching her closing her eyes and f*****g watching her naked in front of me.

Off course, she’s oblivious that I am looking at her. In fact, she even knows that I am mad at her for no reason. She didn’t even bother to say a single word to me ever since I came back here in Nashville. But that’s okay, she will be mine. Eventually.

I don’t know how many times I’ve watched her out the window naked, and all for me to watch and see. I also don’t know how many times I’ve used my hands to release myself from this painful arousal every time I see her. But the feeling is still the best feeling even if I have someone else to warm my bed. I also don’t know how many times moaned her f*****g name while having s*x with others. But they know better not to gossip to others, they know what can happen to them if they do.

And while she sleeps soundly, sometimes I enter her window just to breath her scent in. Her citrus flower scent that invades my mind every night and calmed my nerves every time my panic attacks. She doesn’t catch me at all for eight years, because my Ellora is a heavy sleeper. And the sight of her slightly parted lips while sleeping sends me in euphoric mind. I didn’t even know how many times I have imagined that plump lips will wrapped around my throbbing c**k. I even jerk off when I am still in her room and that is the f*****g best part.

Call me sick, Psycho, pervert or freak.

But the big picture here; Ellora is mine.

Speaking of my panic attacks, as I aged. I even learned how to used some various things that helped me with it. I am not proud but it’s just the only thing helped me during attacks. The only one who knew about this panic attack and helped me with this is Cloud. But I am not afraid he might tell anyone, I truest Cloud more than James this day.

Ellora is still head over heels for James, luckily James don’t want anything to do with her because of her Father who is still the Reverend of our town. I didn’t even hear him say anything about Ellora’s adolescent, because f**k him he does. James grew up as a f*****g manwhore. Girls like me more but I am too picky to sleep at night with some girl on my bed. I prefer a black long hair every time. And I wanted to take them from behind. That way, I can imagine it is my Ellora underneath me. not someone else.

I admit this is a sick fascination. But I don’t care.

Nothing in me is normal. Nothing in my being is okay and fine.

I am different in my bones and even in my flesh.

Soon, there’s no more distance and space needed between me and Ellora. And if fate works to the both of us perfectly, it turns out that her f*****g name is the one I am dreading to have eight years ago up until now.

Because Ellora means f*****g Sleep.