Confined Four Years

Believing

~~~~~Zachariah~~~~~

            Two months into Zachariah’s stay with Marcus, Julia, and the three children, he often found himself reminded of her words that day. ‘I believe in you.’ He wanted to believe in himself the way she did, but he was still no closer to finding his path than he was before. College kept him busy with assignments, but the tiny cries of Sophia always drew him away to find out what she was doing. Today, instead of focusing on his studies, he was watching Julia play with Sophia with a toy he was unfamiliar with. Her thin finger drug the strings of the toy towards and away from Sophia with practiced ease before playing the toy in the small hands of the small baby.

            Zachariah’s tendency to watch Julia only increased since those first few days and now it was his favorite pastime, especially when she interacted with the children. Now that he knew she had a job, he noticed she only worked when her children were at preschool and when Sophia was napping. All other times, she focused fully on raising the three children, easily sliding into the role of being a mom for Sophia as well. He smiled a little at the scene in front of him when Marcus walked in and over to her, with a clear intent to discuss something important.

            From that, Zachariah felt white-hot irritation as he watched as the two talked. In fact, every time he saw the couple together, he would quickly grow irritated and leave the room. He feared her coming to love him the way he and his parents suspected they would. Though he knew that desire was immature, and definitely not something he should feel concerning another man’s wife, he could not help it. He turned his eyes away from the pair in a huff and found the twins staring at him with what seemed like knowing smiles on their lips.

            Part of him kept hoping for more from her, but that would be unfair to the kids. What would they think of their uncle if he tried to get her to fall in love with him? He wondered, tearing his gaze from them. It was unfair for him to think about this while they were watching him so closely. Even though he was irate, he looked back at her where she stood next to Marcus. Honestly, the pair looked like a match made in paradise. She was a head shorter than the six foot four Marcus, but her strawberry blonde hair perfectly offset his darker features, meshing well with the living room background. They looked like the perfect couple.

“You look really sad, Uncle Zach…” Mason observed with a sad smile of his own. “Do you know why mommy and daddy got married?”

“No, I don’t…” Zachariah replied, glancing back down at the twins. “Just that they did.”

“Oh… well…”

            Julia picked that moment to come over to them, a bright smile on her lips. Today, the sundress she picked to wear had light blue coloring with golden accents, causing her eyes to shine even more than usual. He smiled down at her before looking back at the twins, who smiled mischievously before they both stood up and ran away, giggling like two kids who just pulled a prank. While he remained standing there confused, Julia simply shook her head, her floral scent drifting up from her hair when she did. Zachariah could feel Marcus watching him, but he could not pull his eyes from the woman standing next to him.

“Silly twins. What do you think of those two?” She asked, her voice feeling like a caress to him when she spoke. “I think they’re a mess on the best of days.”

“Nah, I love them. Little troublemakers, but they’re brilliant kids.” He replied before turning his attention to the tablet in her hands. “Have some business to take care of, today?”

“Yeah, are you interested in learning? Sophia just fell asleep, so I thought this would be the perfect time to show you a little more of what I do.” Julia smiled up at him, her green eyes narrowing a little in her excitement. “Mostly, I just make sure there are no issues with the website running and connect with potential clients over the sales of their product. It takes some basic coding, but almost everything on the site is automated.”

~~~~~Julia~~~~~

            Julia led Zachariah over to the sofa, where they could sit close enough to look at the tablet together. For the first time in a while, she could smell the spicy scent of his cologne, a different brand from Marcus’s, wafting off of him. Part of it makes her want to move closer, while the other side wants her to keep things professional. As her fingers flew over the screen, she could feel his eyes boring into the side of her face, but did her best to ignore it. This needs to be professional, Julia thought, leaning away a little to look up into his eyes.

“Did you catch that, Zachariah?” Julia asked, noticing the way his chocolate-colored eyes drifted to her lips, then back. “Um…”

“Yeah, the coding is pretty simple. I took some coding courses in college and I always thought they were pretty fun.” Zachariah said before glancing over towards where she knew Marcus was watching television. “And can you stop calling me Zachariah, already? Just Zach is fine.”

            She swallowed thickly, the saliva in her mouth feeling more like syrup. Her cheeks heated a little at how low his voice dropped when he told her to call him Zach, and she glanced at the wall for a second. He put himself on her radar without her even realizing it, she thought, turning her eyes back to her tablet. The longer he stays here, the more conscious she becomes of him, and it feels so wrong. Julia sighed lightly before refocusing on the task at hand when a tiny wail filled their ears. Her eyes followed him when he stood and walked over to where the bassinet rested near the wall in the living room.

            His enormous hands reached out to lift the tiny bundle from the white bassinet gently, his arms moving into position to cradle Sophia properly against his chest. The cries stopped as he bounced her a bit before they could hear soft coos from her. Her mind processed the scene as serene and she felt at peace knowing he picked up all the skills to be a good father to the little girl. Using his free hand, he reached up to run long fingers along her tiny cheek before his chocolate brown eyes lifted to look at me. Time froze and her heart pounded hard against the cage that contained it, her body immediately tensing in response.

“Sophia, I’ll fix you a bottle.” He said, his heated eyes never moving from hers. “Come on.”

            When his gaze finally broke away, Julia sagged against the sofa, unable to believe what just happened between the two of them. She knew she was far too old for a teenager and reconfirmed her stance on the matter when she felt someone watching her. Julia turned to look to find Marcus changed his attention from his show to observe her. Instead of the conversation she felt was coming from him, she turned her attention back to the tablet in her hands to make some modifications to her site. When the seat sank next to her, she thought Zachariah came back, but when she looked up, it was Marcus next to her.

“Are you in love with Zach?” He asked, causing her eyes to widen at his straightforwardness. “It’s been like this since he came here, but today seems especially different.”

“I… he’s too young for me…” Julia tried to brush off his question, but Marcus simply chuckled. “What?”

“You are far too stubborn. He constantly watches you.” Marcus replied, motioning to where the kids’ rooms were in the back of the house. “Even they’ve noticed. I don’t think age matters when you find someone you love. You deserve to be happy with a man who can give you what I can’t, regardless of if he’s my brother or not.”

“I… need to go to the store. I’ll be back later.” She countered, brushing him off again, before standing to ask the twins if they wanted to go with her. “It’s not too late in the day, so I’ll take the twins. They need to get out some.”

~~~~~Zachariah~~~~~

“Are you in love with Julia?” Marcus asked, the question grabbing my attention immediately. “Is that what’s going on?”

            Zachariah automatically held his breath at Marcus’s question, his eyes focusing on his brother’s familiar brown ones. Oddly enough, Marcus did not look angry in the slightest. If anything, Zachariah would say his brother looked amused. For a moment, he felt as though Marcus’s expression was condescending, but knew that was not true. Not from the kindness which lingered in his big brother’s expression. No, he looked happy. What could he say, though? Honestly, Julia is six years older, and he knows he is still just a kid. He often wondered if she would ever even see him as a man. Zachariah leaned back against the sofa and looked at the floor.

            Even should he admit to it, to the feeling of warmth and joy he got every time he saw her, there was no way she would ever love him back. Another sigh parted his lips before he looked back up at the husband of the woman he loved. He had to deny it, somehow, some way. Though he knew this, his mouth would not form the words to say no, and silence engulfed the room. Sophia slept on, blissfully unaware of her father’s dilemma, and Marcus simply leaned back against the recliner he sat in with a knowing smile. What could he do? Change the topic?

            When he came back to the living room with Sophia, Julia and the twins left, apparently needing to pick something up from the store. After their brief exchange, Zachariah could not blame her for wanting to clear her thoughts. Part of him wondered if she would even speak to him when she got back. If she did, would she still call him Zachariah to keep up the distance between them? He could feel the urge to rub his head in frustration. Why did he ask her to call him Zach? That is going to make him seem even less of a man, more like a child throwing a tantrum. He knew he had not been living there long enough to become this obsessed with her.

“She loves you.” Marcus interrupted when Zachariah opened his mouth to speak. “And all I want is for her to be happy. If she pursues her love for you, I will not stop it.”

            Zachariah’s mouth snapped shut at Marcus’s words as shock ran through him. She loves him? But Julia married Marcus. He has seen her worrying for him, and thought she fell in love with him at some point. Marcus is a better man than he is, who has a job, knows what he wants to do in the future, and provides for his family. Zachariah is still a college student, focusing on a General Studies Diploma, and does not know what he wants to do in the future. As he thought this, his eyes fell to the floor. Even if he wanted to be with her, he had nothing to offer.

“I… have nothing to offer a woman as amazing as she is, Marcus.” Zachariah stated clearly, his heart clenching in pain in his chest. “Julia would have no future with someone like me.”

“But see, here’s the thing, little brother.” Marcus said, leaning forward as he spoke, his eyes narrowing slightly. “You offer her the one thing I can’t give her. She already made her own way into the world of business, so you don’t have to support her with money. Knowing her, she would wait for you to figure out…”

“Marcus, it’s the man’s job to provide for his family.” Zachariah said as he stood up, his voice firm. “She doesn’t need a man like me.”