The Beta's Arrival

Chapter 19

Helen’s POV

Gone... She’s gone. They are all gone. I was now alone in this world without them. If it hadn't been for me they would have all survived. James only slaughtered my family because of me. How am I supposed to live with this knowledge? How can anyone live with knowing they are the reason that everyone they loved died because of them? I should have given in. I should have just taken the role of his mate. Then everyone would still be alive. It would be worth it. Diane didn’t even have a chance to meet her wolf or her mate. She didn’t have a chance to live truly. All because of me.

I couldn't calm myself as I stared out the window from the third floor of the packhouse. Without realizing it, I pushed it open, allowing the breeze to wrap around me. My hair blew with the wind behind me. I stepped forward, closer to the edge. I can’t live with this. I can’t live when I am the reason they all died. I don’t deserve to live. I stepped onto the ledge, but as I looked down, I knew this wouldn’t relieve me of this life. I wasn’t high enough up. Not to mention, my wolf would work hard to keep me alive. She felt my pain, but she continued to try and give me reasons to live. She continued to flash images of Vincent through my mind. She wanted me to live for him, but how could I? How could I even attempt to be happy when they would never be happy again?

“Helen?” I heard Vincent call through my closed door as he knocked. “Helen, can I come in?”

I stepped from the ledge to look over at the door, debating how I should respond. “I’m a bit tired...” I responded, trying hard to keep my voice even.

“Please, just let me in,” he pleaded with me.

I wanted to let him in. I wanted to fall into his arms. I wanted to be okay. But how could I allow myself any form of emotional relief? “I’ll see you at dinnertime,” I finally said.

“Rest well and if you change your mind, my room is just a few doors down,” he informed me. I could hear the defeat in his voice, which made my heart ache all the more. I wanted to relieve his stress.

I walked over to the door and listened to his footsteps as they became more distant. I turned back to my room, looking around. They had placed me in a different room from where Diane and I had been staying previously. It was probably for the best. Having her scent around me and her things would have been so much harder. They had moved what belonged to me to this room and informed me that Diane’s things had been packed away in a box. I would be able to claim the box when I was ready.

“Just sleep,” Celestria coaxed me. “Please don’t do anything rash.” I could hear the fear in her voice. My mental state was hanging by a thread.

I didn’t respond to her, but I did go over to the bed and lay down. I didn’t think that I would actually be able to sleep, however, within moments, darkness took over. During my rest, I was met with nothing but darkness. It was probably better this way.

A sudden gust of wind woke me from my sleep. I rolled over to see that I had left the window open. The sun had slipped away, replaced by the moon. Then my eyes landed on the clock. It was after the regular dinner time. I debated getting up to eat or just rolling over and hoping to fall asleep again. Just as I was about to try and rest more, my stomach growled loudly, and I realized how hungry I was.

Getting out of bed, I glanced in the mirror and decided to clean up first. I looked terrible. I went into the bathroom, washed my face, brushed my teeth, and brushed my hair. I still appeared exhausted, but at least I looked better. I made my way down to the first floor hoping to find something to eat. Just as I was about to go into the kitchen, I heard someone say my name. Turning, I saw Vincent sitting at a table with two plates of food.

“There you are,” he said with a smile. “Some sit. I’ve made you a plate, but if there is something you would rather eat, I can have an Omega make it for you.”

I looked down at the plate and then sat down. “No, it’s alright,” I responded.

He didn’t say anything more but instead began to eat. I followed his lead and began to eat as well. We ate in silence. For a long time, he didn’t say anything, he just ate. Somehow it was more comforting than if he had said anything to me.

“Helen, it’s so good to see you out of your room,” I heard the Alpha say from behind me.

“Thank you, Alpha for taking the time to come over,” Vincent responded to the Alpha, trying to make sure he wasn’t insulted by my silence.

“If there is anything you need, please let me know,” he offered and strode off.

Silence wrapped around us again as I continued to push the food around on my plate, periodically taking a small bite. It felt as though the clock had slowed, everything had. I wanted the world to stop. I wanted time to reverse. I needed to fix everything I had broken.

Suddenly, I felt a hand on my cheeks, brushing it lightly. Then I noticed it was Vincent wiping away my tears. “Why don’t I take you back upstairs,” he offered.

“Okay,” I mumbled as I let him take my hand and pull me from the chair.

We walked upstairs with him slightly in front of me. He guided me all the way to my room, opened the door and took me back to my bed. He helped me onto the bed and covered me with a blanket. Then he turned to leave, but I didn’t want to be alone. With what little strength I had, I wrapped my fingers around his shirt sleeve, causing him to stop.

“Do you want me to stay?” he asked as he turned back to face me. I nodded. “Where do you want me?”

“Beside me,” I whispered.

Without another word, he laid down next to me on top of the blanket. “I’m here for whatever you need,” he promised me.

“Thank you.” I couldn’t seem to force my voice to be louder.

“Always and forever.” He rolled over and pulled me closer to him. With him so close, I began to feel more at ease, which didn’t feel fair, but at the same time, it was what I needed most.

James’ POV

She escaped. Holand allowed her to escape. Her sister is dead. This is all his fault. “James!” I heard my father bellow my name.

I walked into his office. “Do you have no common sense? No sense of preservation for the pack?” he growled at me.

“I needed my ...” I began to respond.

“Enough!” he yelled as he threw a glass across the room, nearly striking me. “You are putting your own selfish desires ahead of what is best for the pack and I have had enough of it! If you do not come to understand this, then I will be forced to make you step down as the future Alpha. I will choose another to take your place. Do you understand me?”

“Father, you can’t,” I started to complain.

He held up his hand to stop me from talking. “I can and I will. You must choose. Continue this nonsense with your mate or be the future Alpha.”

“How can I choose?” I hissed at him.

“You must. You can only have one,” he pressed. “And if you will not choose then I will choose for you.”

“I will not be pressured by you or anyone else. I will have both,” I answered through grated teeth.

“Then I will choose. You will step down. You are not fit to be Alpha. Maybe you never have been,” he responded as stepped around his desk and walked toward me. “Since you are no longer the future Alpha, I will punish you for your acts of treason against the pack.”

“You can’t... You don’t have the right,” I lashed out at him.

“I do.” Just as the words passed through his lips, the doors to his office swung open and warrior marched in. Before I knew it, I was being dragged from the office and out of the packhouse.