The Secret Billionaire At The Commune

Chapter 2

Whack! Nana bopped Jason in the back of the head with a rolled up newspaper, breaking his and Alexis’ trance-like connection.

“I swear you two are worse than cats in heat,” Nana chided, shutting the bathroom door in Jason’s face. “We have company coming soon, kiddos, go get ready.” Nana was well aware of her grandchildren’s shenanigans and while she didn’t outright condone a potential relationship, she was of the firm belief that you love who you love and that you only have one life to live so be true to yourself. Her gray hair was braided into two plaits that went down past her waist and she wore a Grateful Dead dancing bears tee shirt, covered by her denim gardening overalls. “Alexis, hurry up, I need to get the dirt off me before everyone gets here,” Nana reminded Alexis.

Alexis quickly rinsed herself and turned the water off. That wasn’t the first time Nana caught her and Jason. She was grateful for Nana’s lack of judgment. Alexis quickly dried herself and hustled into her room to change, passing Jason in the hallway, who playfully smacked her butt. She swatted his hand away, laughing. She knew she needed to hustle - her sister’s kids would be here soon and those poor babies were always hungry.

Once in the kitchen, Alexis tied Nana’s old apron around herself and got to work. Her dinner rolls had been proofing in the fridge and pot roast was in the slow cooker, filling the trailer with its delicious aroma. She quickly began peeling potatoes as Nana carried a basket of garden fresh green beans over to the tiny table and began snapping them.

“How was work today, dear?” Nana asked lovingly. Alexis was relieved there was no further discussion of her and Jason’s peeping tom situation.

“The bakery has been slow, too slow,” Alexis responded. “I’m worried about its long term survival.” Nana nodded in response.

“You know, I do have some money tucked away,” Nana began, “Maybe it’s time to seriously start considering culinary school.” Alexis turned to her, shocked.

“Nana, I can’t ask you to fund that, what if you needed that money?” Nana shrugged.

“Your sister has no problem burning through my cash,” Nana began, “I have no problem funding an actual future for you. That’s why you’re getting all of this,” Nana gestured her hands around the trailer, laughing. Alexis raised her eyebrows at her, at a loss for words. “Alexis, you and Jason will be getting everything,” Nana continued, “Amber has already gotten more than her due. She won’t be able to contest it, either.”

“Nana, I don’t like talking about this kind of stuff,” Alexis protested.

“It’s necessary to talk about this kind of stuff,” Nana replied. Alexis held her hands to her ears. “I also want to be cremated and planted in a tree with a good view of the mountains. Also, there’s a farmstand about an hour and a half away that sells wonderful bouquets for the service. My old commune still grows them.” Alexis let her hands fall to her sides.

“Nana,” she began as Jason came into the kitchen, all cleaned up but still wearing Alexis’ scrunchie. He sensed the girls were having an intense discussion and gently took the potato peeler out of Alexis’ hands and quietly finished skinning the potatoes at the sink. Alexis turned to him. “Nana is telling me her last wishes all of the sudden,” she complained to Jason. Jason looked at Nana, her blue eyes shining bright at him.

“So you want your remains scattered at Disneyland but you don’t want to be cremated, got it,” he said to her. Nana roared with laughter and decided it was time to change the subject. She walked over to the slow cooker, lifting the lid.

“Treat this meat well,” Nana said, “I traded a few bags of… Uhh… My herbs for it.” Jason and Alexis exchanged a look, Nana just confirmed their longstanding suspicions. Just then, the front door swung open and Alexis’ sister Amber, her husband Brandon and their three unruly and unkempt children let themselves in.

***

“Aunt Alexis!” The children shrieked as they ran into the kitchen, headed straight for the basket of dinner rolls. Alexis gathered them into a hug and gave each one a hunk of bread. She always wondered if her sister ever fed her kids or if she was just dependent on her and Nana’s good hospitality for their sustenance. Amber and Alexis did look like sisters but Amber was a more rotund and shorter version of Alexis. Her strawberry blonde hair was highlighted with blonde streaks and coiffed into the can-I-speak-to-the-manager haircut. Her brown eyes seemed to be permanently stuck into a judgemental squint and she lacked the self-awareness that gave her the audacity to send “Hey babe” f*******: messages to old high school friends, attempting to peddle her latest MLM scheme. They couldn’t be more different, Jason thought as he watched Alexis butter the rolls for her nieces and nephews while Amber plopped next to Nana, getting ready to butter her up for her next pitch.

“Here you go, Nana,” Amber said, fishing a box of cosmetics from her fake Louis Vuitton bag. Nana rolled her eyes, she knew what was coming.

“Amber, enough with the pyramid schemes,” Nana said as Amber gasped. “Why don’t you go ask your father’s family about these?” Amber and Alexis’ mother was Nana’s daughter; their father’s family was the type of pure stereotypical West Virginia trash that you only read about and are shocked to encounter in real life. Amber was 10 years older than Alexis so she was exposed to their father’s side of the family much more than Alexis was and they certainly rubbed off on her. Amber had no shame in her game.

“Nana, it’s multi-level marketing, not a pyramid scheme,” she retorted, pushing the box closer to Nana. Nana waved her off.

“Not today, Amber. It’s Jason’s birthday.” Amber snorted.

“He’s not even real family,” Amber started complaining, “He’s a grown ass man who lives here with you guys and watches Alexis shower. It’s so weird, like why are you still here.” Amber glared at Jason, clearly jealous that he was being celebrated instead of her being the center of attention for no apparent reason. Alexis and Nana glared hard back at Amber.

“You’re such a b***h,” Alexis told her. Amber laughed it off as her husband, Brandon, joined them in the kitchen. He was carrying a six-pack that was already missing a beer.

“Happy birthday, man,” he said to Jason, handing him the remaining five beers.

“Thanks,” Jason said half-heartedly, stashing them in the fridge. Brandon was a lech and was always ogling Alexis. Jason couldn’t blame him, Alexis was stunning to look at but he felt protective of her, especially around a drunk creep like Brandon. He did somewhat pity Brandon, being married to a woman who makes t****k videos about your incompetence as a husband for internet clout must be tough. Jason put himself between Alexis and Brandon as Amber continued to try to sell Nana on her latest venture.

After dinner, Alexis set up a sprinkler for the kids to at least get some of the grime off of them as the adults set up for coffee and pie on the deck. Jason’s boss, Dave, had joined them, excitedly telling him about a new job they’d been asked to work.

“It’s basically this-and-that maintenance on a run down farm about an hour and a half away,” Dave explained, “They’re good people and offered for you to stay there while you finish the job, if you don’t want to make the commute.” Jason thought about it. It wasn’t a bad offer and the work was easy for him. “They’ll even feed you, too,” Dave was trying to sell him on it. Dave had a wife and kids in town and didn’t want to drive three hours a day roundtrip, or else he would have taken the job himself in a heartbeat. Alexis sliced into the chocolate cream pie and was handing out slices while Amber was clearly eavesdropping on Jason and Dave’s conversation.

“You know, it sounds like a great opportunity for you, Jason,” she began, “A chance to get out of here and spread your wings.” Nana shut her down immediately.

“We don’t want him out of here,” Nana said, giving Jason a gentle squeeze on the shoulder. Alexis wanted to slam the pie in her sister’s face.

“Well,” Amber couldn’t take a hint, “If you ever want to find your real family,” and she handed Jason a sloppily wrapped box and said, “happy birthday.” Jason tore open the paper to reveal an AncestryDNA kit.

“Oh,” he said quietly.

“What the f**k, Amber,” Alexis seethed, “Why do you have to be so f*****g rude.”

“Like, why is he still here,” Amber tried to defend herself, “Mom was the one taking in strays and she’s been dead for years so shouldn’t he stop mooching off our family?” Alexis wanted to take a swing at her. “And you only want him around because you’ve had a crush on him since like, forever, but it’s time to move on, both of you.” Amber looked satisfied with herself, like she was doing everyone a favor with her unsolicited opinions.

“What is your f*****g problem-” Alexis began before she was cut off by Nana.

“Why don’t you worry about your own house,” Nana said sternly, “Take your grimy kids, your drunk husband and get your raggedy ass off my porch and get back home now.” Amber was visibly stunned. So were Alexis and Jason; Nana never spoke to anyone like that. “Jason is a part of this family and if you don't like it, you can leave.” Brandon was apparently better at reading cues than his wife and quickly gathered the children into their car while Amber hastily helped herself to a Tupperware of leftovers in the kitchen. Alexis was too mad to stop her but at least her children would have something to eat the next day.

The mood was killed the rest of the evening. Alexis and Nana quietly cleaned up and kept assuring Jason that Amber was just a busybody and that he was indeed a part of their family and in no way a mooch. Jason quietly drank the remaining beers that Brandon left him on the porch and went to bed early that night.