Hate, actually

Chapter 7

(Same day)

To say that I'm thoroughly frightened will be an understatement of epic proportions.

Frightened for my life.

"Are you okay?" Leonardo asks from the driver's seat.

No.

I fiddle with my ponytail. "I decided to check my social medias, since I haven't really had the time. Big mistake."

He spares me a knowing look. "That bad?"

"To say the least. I've been getting death threats from your so called fans who are saying they claimed you first. What if one or two of them follow through with their threats? One wants to slit my throat with her high heeled shoe."

"That's actually kind of funny."

"It's not." I realize too late that I kind of sound whiny.

"I can almost guarantee you that the threats are coming from twelve year olds. Dignity and self respect usually only come knocking after that age. We've all experienced it. I'll get you security if it'll make you feel better, though."

His voice sounds so sure and in control. He can go on about different cotton candy colors and I'll still feel like I'm in an important interview. It's not like I haven't noticed this before but it chose this moment to catch me off guard.

"You'd be surprised..."

"I'll get you the security. Don't worry about it." He changes the song on the station from Cotton Eyed Joe to some indie rock. "By the way, I'm proposing this weekend. Just a reminder."

"Oh how romantic of you to tell me beforehand," I fake gush.

"Whatever. Just be prepared. Oh and your stylist will be coming to your place tomorrow. Try not to take it personally-"

"How could I ever?" I drawl out sarcastically.

"I have a reputation to keep up with, Sadie."

"Look, I'm okay with it. Just so long as this stylist doesn't try to make any drastic changes to my appearance like freaking botox."

"Don't be ridiculous."

"With your kind of lifestyle, I can't be too cautious. I've read about your business associates, the ones you supposedly hold in high regard. Being surprised that they've had cosmetic surgery done more than three times is equivalent to being surprised that the sun rises each morning."

"Yeah, well welcome to the lifestyle, Sadie. Leave all your judgement at the door and make sure to wipe your feet on the doormat before you enter."

"Well damn you, Leonardo Romano. Ever heard of freedom of speech?"

"That law should not apply to you," he states all as-a-matter-of-factly.

"Whatever."

"Wanna stop this banter for the wedding planner's sake?" He says, sighing like I'm the most immature person out there as he parks his car in front of a fancy diner.

"Put a sock in it Leonardo, you don't call the shots," I say mostly to annoy him more than anything.

He ignores my sentiments. "What's your favorite color?"

I furrow my eyesbrows in confusion. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Just answer the question."

I give him a weirded out smile. "Uh...gray?"

He simply nods and pulls his keys out of the ignition, exiting the car.

Before I can even find my bearings and follow suit, he's already opening my door like the chivalrous man he is.

Hah. Chivalrous my foot. If only the onlookers knew they were witnessing the grandest of schemes.

"I thought we were meeting the wedding planner at your place," I say to Leonardo as we walk into the diner.

"Change of plans. I'm starving and my chef has today off."

"Leonardo Romano is giving one of his staff members the day off? I'm sure you organized for that one to hit the papers too."

We sit down at a table for three.

Leonardo seems unphased by my pokes at his ego but nevertheless asks, "Has anybody ever told you you're annoying?"

"Nope. People love me."

"Oh I bet."

We bicker back and forth (well, mostly me just trying to annoy him, really) and Leonardo is saved from another one of my snarky comments by a waitress in her mid-fifties at least. She has her little notebook poised at the ready and she beams at us, eyes shining with kindness.

"Can I take your orders?"

Leonardo - who's obviously more familiar with the place - realises I haven't even glanced at my menu and decides to order for the both of us.

I'm pretty grateful for that.

When the waitress leaves our table, a man about Leonardo's age approaches our table, clad in a black button down that's left a little open to expose his chest, a pair of black slacks and shoes that no doubt cost more than my aunt Lizzy's apartment.

His dark hair is neatly slicked back and judging by the way he winks at a male waiter on his way over to us, he clearly isn't interested in women and he endeavours in making it known, too.

"Mr Romano," he gushes sitting down next to me, "It's nice to finally meet you!"

He shakes hands with Leonardo and then turns to me. "And I'm assuming you're the bride to be, darling. My name is Michael and I can't wait to make your wedding a success!"

He leans over and gives me a hug, surprising me but I embrace him nevertheless.

"It's nice to meet you Michael, I'm Sadie," I say politely.

So over the next hour, we all talk wedding. From the wedding arrangements, to creating a schedule for what needs to be done in preparation, to Micheal calling and making appointments at a spa and salon of 'my choice' (I honestly just pick random ones from his list).

By the time we're through, I don't even want to hear the word wedding for at least three hours.

"Do you want to choose the ring?" Leonardo asks as he parks in front my aunt's small red-brick colonial.

"Nope. Surprise me. I'd probably end up picking out a random one due to my lack of jewelry knowledge."

"Fine by me then. I'll pick you up tomorrow at 1 pm. The stylist should've left your place by then."

"Oh joy. May I know exactly how this proposal will play out?"

"You will find out tomorrow, Sadie."

I sigh. "Okay, whatever."

I exit the car and mumble a goodbye. He soon speeds off as I make my way inside the place I've been calling 'home' for the past couple of years.

As soon as I enter the house, I'm met with the sight of Dave, aunt Lizzy's boyfriend sitting in the living room watching TV with his shoeless feet up on the coffee table.

I immediately cringe at the smell his shoes will probably emit.

I shut the front door and he looks up, his dark abyss-like eyes regarding me.

"Where's aunt Lizzy?" I ask him.

I know she works a double shift at the hospital on Saturdays and the idea of being home alone with her creepy douchebag boyfriend makes me want to hurl.

He ignores my question. "There's a couple of dirty dishes in the sink. You should probably go and sort them out."

I furrow my eyesbrows in confusion. "I didn't have breakfast here, so they aren't mine."

He quirks up an eyebrow. "So?"

What an a*s.

"So I'm not doing them," I say.

He removes his feet from the coffee table and sits up, trying his best to look intimidating but I can't for the life of me take a man like that seriously, especially when his little potbelly is sticking out of his work vest.

Gag me. Some taste in men aunt Lizzy has.

"Look, young lady. If it were up to me you'd have been out this house a long time ago. You're lucky Liz took pity on you and in my opinion, you should be earning your stay here because I could probably still convince her to throw you out."

I cross my arms to somehow pump effect into the words I'm about to say. "I guess it's a good thing this is not up to you. My aunt Lizzy and I are family and I don't care enough to define the term to you but you should know that there will be no earning of anything and some random grizzly guy with a pot belly isn't going to come here and change that. You should know better than to try and come between family, trust you me."

Judging from her past relationships, aunt Lizzy always chooses family first. No matter what. It's a deal breaker for her because she doesn't have much family that she's on speaking terms with left. This man is signing a warrant to lose her if I'm to tell her about our exchange.

Dave seems to be clued on this because he visibly simmers down and turns into the human pimple I saw the first time we were acquainted. I've never seen anybody turn as red as he can.

You'd think the fact that he is so prone to embarrassment would keep his big mouth shut. Alas.

I don't wait for him to answer me, though. I have enough on my plate as it is.

I pad up the creaking wooden stairs to my room and I shut the door firmly.

What to do, what to do?

I don't have the slightest clue on what I'm to do with my life.

I started on a book in December, but I haven't worked on it in weeks because of lack of inspiration. So I can't do that, even if I try. I have too much on my mind and I'll end up letting my personal life seep into the plot.

I suddenly wish I was fourteen again, a time where I'd have been perfectly content with scrolling through Tumblr for hours non stop.

I sit on my bed and scroll through my contacts, wondering who to call.

Who would cure my boredom in a flash and save me from the grizzly pimple downstairs?

I stop on Kai's number and decide to call. We haven't talked - just us - in ages.

He picks up on the third ring.

"Hey bub," he greets, sounding his usual chipper self.

"Hey there. You busy?"

"Never too busy for you." I can almost hear the smirk forming on his face.

Ever the flirt, my friend Kai.

"Be serious," I almost whine.

He laughs. "Alright, alright. I'm at a shoot but I'll be done in five, we're just discussing the next shoot. Why, what's up?"

"I'm bored."

"You only call me up when you're bored, huh." He tries to sound like he's just messing with me but I can sense the hurt in his voice.

"Kai, I really want to see you. There's a reason I called you and not any one else."

"We haven't talked in so long. Well, it feels like it at least." He seems to be thinking out loud.

"I was just thinking the same thing when I dialed your number."

"Wanna hang out at my place? I'll make you dinner."

I smile. "Sounds like a plan."

"I'll be there in ten." And then he hangs up.

I put my phone aside and head over to the the mirror. I still look alright in my hoodie, jeans and Doc Martens.

I quickly grab some lip gloss from my dresser and apply it to my lips.

I mean, it's not like I'm necessarily trying to look good for Kai... I just don't want to look like a slob or anything is all.

I go back to my bed and play a game of smash hit for a while until Kai texts that he's outside.

I'm not sure why I feel lightheaded when I see his message but I do.

I put my phone in my purse, go downstairs, past the grizzly pimple and straight to my best friend's car.

Boy, am I glad he's here.

He's leaning against his sports Mustang (his pride and joy) right across the street and he tackles me in a hug as soon as I reach him. He smells like some men's body wash and lavender and I almost hum in glee at the familiar scent, eyes closed and all.

I step back to appraise him. He's wearing his favorite olive green windbreaker, (the color looks really good against his skin, by the way) dark skinny jeans and a pair of white NMD's.

His fiancé is one lucky girl.

He smiles at me in this Kai way of his and opens the passenger door for me.

I didn't know I would, but I appreciate the fact that a guy is opening a car door for my sake and not the rest of the world's.

And so we talk and talk non stop on the way to his place and I almost don't realize it when the engine stops.

Kai's only recently moved out of his parents' house and I've only ever been to his place once before.

He lives in a double story adobe, Santa Fe style home and - not to sound like a middle aged woman or anything - I love what he's done with place, both interior and exterior wise.

Kai - like Lauren and Steve - is also very well off. Everyone at my highschool was well off, really. I had been one of the exceptions, of course, on the grounds that I was a scholarship kid. Even though no one one outside my circle knew the latter, it still took it's toll and I oftentimes felt pressured to be someone I'm not.

I guess that's a big part of the reason Leonardo's lifestyle is kind of a nightmare to me.

"I hope you know that when I said I'd make you dinner, I meant we'd order Thai," Kai announces as we head upstairs to his room to put on a movie.

I roll my eyes. "Of course. It was either that or you were considering attempting a homocide by actually cooking."

When Kai cooks, it's horrible and he knows I hate it. He's strict on using healthy ingredients - thats all he has in his kitchen and I'd sooner eat barbed wire than sorghum or whatever the f**k else he has in there.

Kai only ever consumes anything considered unhealthy when Lauren, Steve and I are around.

"Come on, my cooking isn't even bad. You just need to get used to it so you can stop killing your insides with all the greasy food you eat."

Looking around, I notice Kai's room is really tidy. Leave for the random pile of socks in the corner.

The space is vast with a dark blue color on the high walls, hardwood floors and a king sized bed on top of a cream rug in the middle of the room. There's a bay window with a seat that gives the room a cozy feel.

I grunt and let myself fall onto his bed. "My insides are very happy with things like pizza, thanks very much."

He smirks and rolls his eyes. "Typical Sadie."

"So what are we watching?"

"Not some awful Hallmark movie, that's all I know."

"But my heart beats for Hallmark movies."

"I've always hoped I was in that miniscule heart of yours. Now? Not so much..."

I smack him with a pillow. "Well now you've just made a grand exit."

He lies down next to me on his stomach, his smile all goofy. "So I was in there, huh?"

"Well since my heart is miniscule, your big head would've never fit in the first place, now would it?" I respond and he pouts.

"You're mean," he declares as I get up to fetch the remote for his flat screen TV which is strategically placed on the wall in front of his bed.

I sit back down, switch the TV on and settle for whatever's on cable, mostly just for background noise. I know we won't be watching much of it, we talk way too much.

"So I broke things off with my fiancè," Kai announces, making me turn to face him.

"Wait...why?" I ask and he sits up and looks at me, carding a hand through his dark hair.

"I don't think it's the right time for me to tell you the reason."

It always drives me up the wall when Kai gives me half information. Half information is no information, I always tell him.

I give him a look. "Kai..."

He sighs. "It's just not the right time for me to tell you. It wasn't fair of me to bring it up if I knew you'd ask for a reason. I'm sorry..."

My stomach churns. Kai is never this serious.

I put my hand on his. "Kai, you can tell me anything."

And he knows it, too.

"I was going to tell you, just not...just not now, I guess."

"Tell me," I insist.

A sick part of me is hoping he'll tell me it's because of me.

What the everliving f**k, Sadie? The sane part of my brain scolds me.

Forest-green eyes look up at me, conflicted.

He sighs and holds my thumb. "Sadie, I like you. I don't know why it's taken me so long to realize it."

My heart starts to pound erratically and I begin to fear a coronary.

Part of it is fear, part of it is excitement.

Kai regards me as if I'm caution itself.

"W-wait. Hold on a second. You broke things off with your fiancé because of me?"

"Yeah... My heart has - like - weird timing for deciding things."

I stand up and start pacing the room.

I pause my pacing. "Kai are you sure? This isn't one of your phases?"

He runs his hand through his hair again. "I've never been more sure about anything. It's been in the back of my mind for ages and when I saw you go off with that Leonardo guy, I was devastated. That's when I knew for sure..."

"When you say ages, how long are we talking?"

He cracks a tiny smile. "Freshman year; that day you laughed too hard and orange juice came out of your nose."

If this is a dream, I swear I don't want to wake up...

Breathe in, breathe out.

I sit down on the hardwood floor, head in hands.

He sighs. "Say something. Please."

I then realize he's still sitting right there. "You're probably wondering why I'm freaking out, aren't you?"

"Well...your best friend of many years basically just told you that he is in love with you and he'd rather be with you than anyone else in the world. I can see why you're freaked out."

Love?

I let out a small laugh. "No, Kai. If anything, I'm ecstatic."

"Wait. What?"

"I've liked you for years. Even before our freshman year."

He slips off the bed and sits next to me on the hardwood floor.

He takes my hand in his. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Well you were too busy going through all the phases in the big book of phases."

He smiles a little. "You knew those were all phases?"

"Well, I kind of figured. I know you like I know my bedroom ceiling."

He looks down and fiddles with the carpet. "So you and Leonardo... Is it serious?"

What to do? What to do?

Lose the chance to be with someone I've practically always dreamed of being with, or lose the opportunity to financially aid my sick mother after breaching the contract?

This should be a no brainer, but I weigh out my options anyway because I decide there should be a way out.

I then realize that I can trust Kai and he won't tell a soul about the contract.

The only thing holding me back is the possibility of Kai not wanting to be with someone who's leading such a complicated life.

There's only one way to find out... And so I tell him everything.