Chapter 13: Into the Despair
4747 Words
Chapter 13: Into the Despair
The silent, heart-crushing tension takes over the mistress’ office at the end of Alcina’s heartless remark. Despite knowing it is anger talking, Tiana’s still hurt by her ladyship’s words nonetheless. The botanist is also aware that she is the one who provokes Alcina, pushing the tall lady beyond the breaking point by prying into an emotional wound Alcina doesn’t want to even think about. Yet it’s hurt all the same. Blinking slowly, Tiana tries to get her bearing as the words are sinking in and tearing away the strength in her legs. The botanist gasps for air as her chest is clogged by tears coming up, threatening to spill at any moment. Meanwhile, the tall lady exhales sharply, pinching the bridge of her nose as she doesn’t expect to get this work up, and lashes out on Tiana like this.
“Little prey, I” the tall lady sighs out once more, aiming to continue, but Tiana speaks first.
“You’re right”
“What?” Alcina lowers her hand, looking in the botanist’s direction in surprise.
“Seems like a month isn’t enough to get to know you after all” Tiana forces a weak smile to her face. “I’m sorry for making you felt uncomfortable.”
No. I’m the one who directs my wrath against her, why she’s the one apologizing? Alcina asks herself internally. The mistress then gets up from her throne to approach Tiana. However, the botanist’s still shaken by Alcina’s rage earlier which makes her retreat backward automatically.
“Tiana” Whispering that out, Alcina realizes now how badly she hurts Tiana by her words and temper.
“But you know what, Alcina. The reason it’s hard for me to get to know you is that you barely tell me things.” Tiana swallows sorrow down her throat and goes on, “Whenever I take a step toward you, you then take two steps backward. I used to doubt it before, but I understand now that it’s because you were hurt in the past. However, assuming from what Donna told me, it has been already too long, hasn’t it?”
“What exactly did my sister told you? Why it sounds to me like the two of you had been talking behind my back?”
Once again, a sense of fury can be heard from the mistress’ tone. It’s well known that Alcina despises it when people talking or prying into her matters. She half-consciously raises her voice as well as wearing a visible annoyance in her eyes. But it disappears as fast once Alcina sees the rueful, forced smile on Tiana’s visage.
“She also didn’t tell me much because she knows you’d react this way. And as I said, I only assume from what I heard” Tiana pauses for a brief to keep her breaking tone in check. After some struggling, she continues, “However. My point is, isn’t it time for you to move on? You know, letting go of the past and living a life with those who matter to you?”
“I’ve been living just fine with the girls even before you came along, haven’t I?” Alcina doesn’t mean to make it sound brutal as it appears to be. So, she swiftly flicks her orbs to Tiana, thinking of a way to fix it. Unfortunately, the sight of a droplet of tears falling across the botanist’s cheek takes Alcina’s ability to speak away.
“I see” the botanist puts on a brave face, wiping her tear away. “Yet why it seems to me like you don’t actually live and just survive?”
“I…” Alcina can’t argue with that.
What Tiana said is right. The vampire lady has lost her interest in life ages ago. Nothing can make her heart race in excited. No activity or hobby can capture her attentiveness. No place she wants to go. No significant reason for her to continue breathing on for. Truthfully, if it wasn’t for her 3 daughters, Bela, Cassandra, and Daniela, Alcina may already lose it since the moment she lost Mother Miranda and everything years ago.
“You only letting each day passing by with no meaning to it, right?” the botanist holds onto herself, suppressing an overwhelming sympathetically she feels for the lost Alcina then hesitantly says, “Can’t that be me, Alcina? The meaning, the other reason you want to live on for, besides the girls?”
“…What if, what if things take turn for the worst and resulted in me being alone and lost again? I recently got better—Can’t we stay as is, little prey?”
“I know it sounds scary, but can’t you give us a chance? Take a leap of faith with me, here and now. And I promise I’ll forever be by your side as long as you’d allow me to”
“Then what if you got sick and then die? What if you got into an accident and leave me by myself without giving me a chance to say goodbye as Mother Miranda did? I don’t want another torturing life, trying to pick pieces of myself back together again”
“Hey. That isn’t going to happen anytime soon. I’m still here. Healthy and young. We can worry about that fragile and limited lifespan of mine later once you allow me into your life. We can work this out together if only you’d take my hand”
Extending her palm out, Tiana wants her ladyship to grab it so she can pull Alcina into her embrace. Sadly, after minutes of waiting, all Tiana gets are the vampire lady’s hesitant look and complete silence.
“So, this’s how you want it to be?” Smiling bitterly, the botanist lowers her hand. “I…I’ll respect your wish”
“Tiana—”
“You know there’s a time that I’m willing to make any adjustment needed, so I can be with you. I’m still firm in that decision, actually” Tiana’s pupils gradually flood with tears that she has been suppressing. Though she’s crying, it can’t stop her from pushing on. “I considered retiring from being a cultural anthropologist, thus I can stop traveling around and settling here with you. I even subtly ask Donna how Cadou works as well as research about it on my own in hope for the eternity with you—*Heavy Sigh* But I figured these ideas of changing and forsaking part of me is for naught when you don’t want to take a risk with me”
The word forsake reminds Alcina of the time Karl pulled her senses back from utter despair when she thinks she lost everything. The vampire lady is now seeing her old self inside Tiana. The genuine love and devotion flash perceptibly in Tiana’s eyes. And the said sight duplicates with the memory of the way Alcina once looks up to Mother Miranda too. When realizing how wrong she is when she says Tiana doesn’t know her, the mistress reaches her hand out, intending to pull the petite human into her arm. Though, Alcina’s a second too slow as Tiana is taking her leave.
“Te iubesc, my lady—And goodbye”
It’s so bitter that the Romanian usage skill Tiana has been studying in secret to impress her ladyship is used in a farewell situation as of now. ‘Te iubesc…I love you—I wish I can tell her this in the happier circumstance’, the botanist concludes. And with that, Tiana leaves Alcina’s office, disappointed, heartbroken, and in tears.
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“Hey. Who’s at the stable at this late of hours?” Daniela asks Cassandra while the two are playing together in their room. She happens to look through the window which has a clear view of the stable of castle Dimitrescu and see the figure in a distance.
“Probably mama” the brunette answers without turning to see who they really are, tackling her younger sister down as part of their game and giggling in delight as she wins. “She’s the only one mother allows to enter the stable beside us, after all”
Although the three daughters are decades older than Tiana, they refer to the botanist as mama while they are alone. They can’t help it since Tiana has a warm, mysterious motherly vibe that similar to what they feel from Alcina, despite only spending a month together. Tiana is brilliant, compassionate, charming, and reliable to the three sisters throughout her stay. Never once that any of theirs or their vampire mother’s plaything ever treat them with this kind manner or make them feel this comfortable in a way. The three daughters usually ask for stories from the botanist as Tiana has tons of them from her listless trips all over the world. And Tiana does satisfy their demand with interesting facts and captivating tales every time without fail. The botanist even shows them her travel journal, and albums after albums as supportive proof to all the narratives she tells. As such, what’s not to like about this petite human?
However. What moves the three daughters the most among other reasons is how Tiana able to bring life back to their vampire mother. Either their mother notices it or not, the girls can vividly see that Alcina is changing for the better since the botanist comes around. The vampire lady seems less agonize, going through her day. During the month Tiana’s here, Alcina spaces out less while smiles and laughs more than she normally does in a year. The girls feel as they get the old Alcina back again! Something even the three of them couldn’t do—How impressive is that?
Though, they haven’t found the courage to address Tiana as mama openly yet since the botanist’s status is still Alcina’s plaything all the same. The three sisters don’t want to affect their mother’s judgment with their desire. Thus, no matter how much they’d like Tiana as their official 2nd mother, they would only love it if that’s what their vampire mother wants too.
“Hey! This’s cheating!” the youngest pouts.
“Wait, why would mama go there this late? It’s like, almost 6 now” Bela peaks closer to the window to get a better look. Even from this length, Tiana looks rather…haggard.
“Maybe she forgot something in the stable?” Cassandra replies, still pinning the redhead against the floor.
“Maybe—Huh? W-wait! She took off!” Cries out, Bela.
To the girls’ surprise, they crowd together in the same window frame, witnessing Tiana leaves with haste. They talk to each other, try to make out what it’s all about. Even with so many doubts to figured out, what they concern about the most right now is Tiana’s safety—The three sisters don’t know if Tiana has that flora on her or not, seeing her leaves in hurry like that.
“This won’t do” the brunette stands up, “Come on, let’s follow her”
“Don’t make a rash decision, Cass. You know we can’t. It’s getting dark pretty quickly as well as the temperature drops sharply at this time of the year. We wouldn’t even make it through the front gate” Bela pulls her sister back while warning.
“Then what should we do? What if mama, indeed, doesn’t have that flora? What if she ran into uncle’s Karl Lycans along the way?” the sincere unsettled feeling is evidently in Daniela’s tone.
“Let’s go inform mother first. She’ll know what to do”
The other sisters nod to the blonde’s suggestion. Then the three dissipate into swarms and rush to find their mother in a brief. Once they get inside Alcina’s office and about to inform the vampire lady of what happened, they are met by the scene of their mother sitting on the edge of her desk, head hangs low with a lifeless expression on her face.
“Mother?” cautiously, Bela takes a step toward the tall lady. “Are you okay? Why you’re in this state?”
“Hm? Oh. It’s nothing, my dear—I’m fine” even when Alcina tries smile at the girls, it doesn’t reach her eyes.
“Oookay. First, mama left our estate on a horseback and now you’re also like this? –What’s really happening, mother?” Cassandra tosses in her query.
“What?” Alcina stuns to her middle child’s words, asking, “What did you say, Cassandra? Who left our estate now?”
Only then do the three sisters realize that the brunette makes a slip of tongue and reveals to the vampire lady what they have been calling Tiana. However, the girls regain their composure back as that’s not what they should focus on at the moment. Therefore, Daniela takes an initiative to continue.
“It’s Tiana, mother. She’s riding out through the front gate”
“At this hour?” a look of confussion passes over Alcina’s face.
“Yes. We saw it with our own eyes” the redhead confirms her mother of what she sees. And to make the matter worse, Bela recalls something and decides to tell her mother about it.
“Isn’t tonight the full moon too?”
“!” Alcina’s visage turns pale as a paper to the sound of that.
The thing is there’s another deal the lords agreed on when they first rebuild the village. According to their experience, the lords know how devasting and uncontrollable Lycans can be. This creature destroys many lives while listens only to the youngest lord, Karl Heisenberg, and only him alone. Though Alcina, Salvatore, and Donna are against the idea of re-establish a pack of foul Lycan back once more, the three lords couldn’t deny that they still need these said creatures for security reasons, as well to keep the villagers under control. As a result, Karl gets his pack back in the end.
However. For the Lycans’ devasting and uncontrollable nature, Karl states that letting them off the leash, allowing them to run wild without being restrained every once in a while, would make it easier for him, ruling these unruly beasts.
“They’re nothing but dogs. If you chain your mutt all the time, it’ll come back to bite you once the chance arises”, is the phrase Karl uses to get his siblings to vouch for him.
Consequently, the lords agree on letting those Lycans blowing off steam every full moon night such as tonight. This means Tiana happens to choose the worst time out, unaware of any of this.
“This’s all my fault” Alcina mumbles, “It shouldn’t be like this—No. I don’t want to lose her. I can’t lose her"
“What are you saying, mother? What happened between you and mama? Why did she take off like that?” Daniela asks.
“Dani, this isn’t the time” Bela places her hand over the youngest’s shoulder, then turning back to Alcina, “So, what can we do to help, mother?”
Alcina blinks, takes in her eldest daughter’s word. That’s right. She can continue blaming herself later once making sure Tiana can come back safe and sound. What matters the most currently is to take action, do everything she can to prevent the worst. Therefore, Alcina composes herself, issuing orders.
“Daniela, call your aunt. Tell Donna that Tiana is out unarmed and unprotected. We’ll need Donna’s dolls to work as a searching team” the redhead nods at her mother and quickly leaves the spot to carry on the given task. Alcina then turns to her middle child, saying, “Cassandra, go get two of our staff. Preferably men, instruct them to ride to your uncles—One to Karl’s and the other to Salvatore’s, informing those two of the situations. Firmly enjoin them that no blood will be shed tonight”
“Of course, mother” the brunette replies, taking off to do her assignment as well.
“As for you, Bela. Please take care of your sisters and our castle for me. Keep your eyes peeled for any sign of Tiana’s return—In the meantime, I’ll go after Tiana myself”
“Don’t worry, mother. Please be swift and safe”
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After leaving Alcina’s office, the botanist doesn’t know what to do. She is hurt and by herself with nobody else to turn to. The shock from unforeseen break-up clouds her head, ripping away her luxury of rational thinking. So, in the end, Tiana just takes off. Her brain is telling her to go somewhere far from this castle, fleeing from where the heartbreaking incident takes place.
“…” The botanist gallops her favorite steed out through the night with only a horse racing sound to be heard.
Ah. Even when she says she’d respect Alcina’s wish, Tiana yet finds her head filled with everything associates with the vampire lady. The way she smiles. Those remarkable golden pupils. The gentleness she shows when calling the botanist’s name—
‘*Sigh* I really have it bad’ it takes some time, but Tiana slows her horse down at last.
She’s not sure how long she has been riding, nor how far she is from the castle Dimitrescu. Tiana doesn’t even know where she is right now. And she lost her flora while riding too. Great. Just…great work, Tia, sarcastically, the botanist curses herself inwardly. There’s still some luck left in her, though. Even the sun already set, Tiana can still make things around her out, thanks to the full moon tonight.
“*Sigh* Where show we go now?” Breathing that out to her stallion, Tiana knows it’s pointless to expect the answer.
To be honest, if her horse starts speaking, she’d be worried. Then again, who else she can talk to? No matter which direction the botanist set her gaze upon, all she sees is the endless sight of trees. And when she navigates her gaze up, planning to read which direction she’s going from the constellation, these trees are way too tall and get into her view.
‘Argh! Guess I’ll have to go for tree bark then’
Using her knowledge in botany, Tiana finds her way out of the wood by studying tree bark. With enough information collected and enough observation done, the botanist can get herself to the old trekking path, leading her somewhere she doesn’t know yet. That’s when she hears the sound that sends a chill traveling down her spine.
“Arhoooooo”
The howling sound comes from quite a distance away from Tiana. Even when she should be glad about it, the botanist takes note that it’s not those howling of a common wolf. She can run into one or two, or even a group of Lycans if she’s not cautious. Thus, she has to get out of the wood, or at least find a shelter. And she better do it fast.
“Giddy up!”
Heavy footsteps echo aloud through the forest, along with indistinct voices calling out the botanist’s name. Those voices belong to Donna’s dolls who pose as a searching team. Unfortunately, Tiana doesn’t know this. So, she ignores it and continues to make a run for hers and the unfortunate steed’s life. “Come on, buddy. You got this”, talking to her horse, the botanist wants to convince both herself and the horse that the two will get through this together. The name-calling, howling, and barking sounds are coming closer to them in every second pass by. As well as the crushing noise from Lycan’s paws stumping against the ground. Tiana smells a disgusting scent in the air which she quicks to realizing the terrified meaning of it. This makes her instinct kick in and takes a sharp turn to avoid getting grab by one of the Lycan at the last second!
‘Too close! Too close! Too close!’
Forcing herself to stay focus, Tiana locks her glance on the path in front of her. She can see the end of the tree line only a little further down the way. So, once more, the botanist spurs her horse to run faster in fear for her life.
“Little prey!”
Tiana’s head snaps to that faint silky voice that cut through the forest. No. There’s no way Alcina would be here, the botanist cogitates with a sad face. She believes she only hears things as a result of building up fear and the rushing of adrenaline in her vein. Heh. Tiana, you pathetic, another cursing shows up in Tiana’s mind. Ironic, isn’t it? Even after being heartbroken by her ladyship, Tiana still hopes it’d truly be Alcina’s voice, coming to her rescue.
“No, no, no—Don’t go that way!” the voice Tiana doesn’t know yells from a distance.
“What?”
The botanist attempts to distinguish what the voice is telling her, but it’s too unclear due to the length and trees stance as an obstacle around here. Then before Tiana would know it, she runs right to the open field and being surrounded by Lycans from every direction.
“Arghh!”
Shocking by the massive pack in front of her eyes, Tiana unintentionally pulls the rein toward herself, forcing her horse to slow down and loses it gaining pace for a bit. As a result, the botanist and her horse lose balance and stagger. The two don’t completely stop running, however, they slow down enough to let Lycans hot on their trail.
“Don’t stop, dammit!” Karl shouts, emerging from another side of the forest on his mechanical equine.
“Keep running, little prey!” Alcina cries from the sky above, hovering one of the Lycans closest to Tiana’s trail, tearing it in halves, and throws it away.
“Oh, for Christ’s sake—Don’t kill all my pet now!” another roar leaves Karl’s mouth as he bickers at his sister while throwing his reliable mallet, knocking other Lycan out at the same time.
Among the dreadful barking, howling, bone-breaking, and flesh-tearing sound, the botanist firmly grips on her awareness to survive this madness. She flicks her head backward to see if any Lycan gets too close to her from time to time while keeping her stallion at his quickest running pace. She plans to make a run toward Heisenberg’s factory in front of her and takes cover there. Alas. The botanist senses her luck run out as one of the Lycans jumps to her blindside and mauls both the stallion’s and Tiana’s right side in the process.
“Arghhhh!” Losing her momentum, Tiana falls from the saddle. Either lucky or not, her left foot stuck with the stirrup, and her left hand still lacing with the rein, so she doesn’t fall flat to the ground.
“Tiana!” her ladyship cries out in terror, witnessing Tiana’s bleeding and hanging to one side of the horse like that.
Alcina flaps her immense wings, racing toward the botanist in the hope to help Tiana away from her current state. The wind from her wings’ motion and her beast image startles the horse even further. It makes him running off in another direction. “Tsk!”, her ladyship clicks her tongue in anger, withdrawing to come up with another way. Alcina wants nothing more than help Tiana, without doubt. But she has to do it in a way that won’t frighten the horse to run back into the forest again. In the meantime, Tiana experiences dizziness from blood loss and harsh rocking motion from hanging to the horse’s side. She feels her limbs slowly lose their strength as her consciousness fades away.
“Heisenberg, help her!” in the moment of desperation, the vampire lady cries out to her brother for help.
“I’m trying! And for god’s sake—Don’t tell me what to do, you leech!” Bawls, Karl. As polite as usual.
As for those Lycans. They are fiercer than before, thanks to the scent of Tiana’s red fluid. For the same reason, it makes these mutated mutts chasing and hunting the botanist down while barely listen to Karl’s commands in forcing them to stop. With dangerous brutes around every corner and with no rider telling him what to do or where to go, the stallion is drove by its instinct alone.
“H-halt, boy—”
Tiana does her best with her given circumstance, hanging by her left arm and leg stuck to one side of the horse, to calm him down. Then. All suddenly she feels like she’s weightless. Like she’s flying or floating of sorts. Unknowing to Tiana, at the moment she’s feeling so, it’s only because her horse is tackled by the largest Lycan, holding them both in the air.
“F_ck! Give me a break, you i***t mutt!” Karl tosses his steel hammer out in the hope to stop his Lycan from whatever it’s doing to the botanist and her steed while keep complaining all the same.
But before the hammer could hit it, the ancient beast already whipped the poor horse in the air, aiming to slam him down to the ground before finally eating. The motion of whipping set Tiana free from her hanging state, sending her soaring and falling to the reservoir below!
“Tiana!” Shouts, Alcina.
The vampire lady instantly dives down from the night sky toward Tiana, extending her hand out to grab the botanist’s hand in the utmost desperation. Hah. She came, Tiana thinks with a grateful grin on her face. She believes her time has come as she’s falling. Though, Tiana’s glad to see Alcina’s dragon-like form before she’d die. She’s happy that the last voice she hears is Alcina’s. Then she is bounced against the water surface. The impact from the fall compares with the height force any of air out of Tiana’s lungs, making her sinking in the deep. The botanist then feels her consciousness slips away.
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To Be Continued >>
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