The Broken Mirror

I Put A Spell On You

This week, while uneventful, has felt like an eternity. My family is still here and except for trying to make sure Apollo felt loved, I have avoided them like the plague. I make small talk with my father when I need to, but my mother. She's truly the plague I am trying to avoid. Thankfully I have Gabrielle, who has kept me busy from them.

We go shopping, or more like we pick out clothes and I offer to pay for whatever she cannot afford. She has not asked how I can afford it, but I know the question is coming. I do not exactly broadcast that my father is wealthy. She stays over and we have been watching movies we love like Dirty Dancing. She knows I have a soft spot for Mean Girls. Lindsey Lohan, my fellow redhead. I just have not told Gabrielle why I love her just, yet, besides loving her movies.

I stand in front of the mirror that is on my vanity, to look at the romper I bought for her party. She is already dressed in a body con dress like the one I bought the other day, but hers is red. The music is blaring from my bedroom.

"Oh, girl! That outfit is fire," Gabrielle compliments me. I smirk and drop my hands to my knees and pop my butt to the music. She begins to laugh and gets up to join. "Look at that quarter black shining through."

"What is that supposed to mean? I couldn't do this if I wasn't?" I stick out my tongue and she laughs even louder. "Remember, a dancer since I was a toddler."

"Yes, I know, still think you should go back to pursuing it," Gabrielle tells me. I shrug my shoulders. "You went to a high school that trained you to classically sing and trained you to dance like a professional, you even had paid work, but you're just going to quit it?"

"Why does it matter? We are going to be late to your own party, let's go!" I said to distract her from her trying to push me back into dance. I cannot dance anymore or sing. It will not be the same. We both look at ourselves before we head to my bedroom door.

My stomach feels like it is a big bag full of nuts and bolts. I have not been to a party since my incident. My anxiety is running high, but I cannot tell them that. I must deal with this on my own. We run down the stairs and I try to run as fast as possible passed my family who is all around the television.

"Siren!" I hear my father yell. I stop in my tracks and take a deep breath to calm myself down.

"Yes, dad?" I asked him. He gets up from the couch to approach me.

"I thought you would join us for our last night here," he assumed. I shake my head no.

"No, I had this party planned before I knew you were coming," I give a face to him that pleads to drop it. I did not want them bringing up anything in front of Gabrielle.

"Is this party, wise?" My father asks me, and my eyes go wide and I try to nod my head towards Gabrielle. He looks at her and Gabrielle looks confused by his question. He shakes his head in defeat, knowing that in order to say what he wants, he must present the elephant in the room to her.

I grab her arm and we head outside to her car. I get in the passenger seat. I would not be back until the next day, because I chose to spend the night at her house. This would be my first time at their house. The one she shares with her brother Ethan and Xavier.

"Why was that so intense?" She asks me. I bite the corner of my upper lip, praying she does not press the issue.

"My family is well...intense," I turn up the music on the radio quickly to drown her out. "Oh! I love this song!" I did not want anymore invading questions, making my anxiety increase. As much time as we have spent this week, I still just met her. I do not even know if can trust her just yet. How do you tell someone that you just met that you are a recovering addict?

We arrive at their house that is in walking distance of our school. There are cars all over the streets and I realize the whole area seems to be alive with college students. I hop out of her car and follow her inside of her house. The music is so loud it feels like it could push you out the house while trying to walk inside.

The house looks older than my grandmother's. Her was built in the early 2000s. This house looks like it could be from the eighties or seventies. They have black plush couches, with pillows thrown on them. I was expecting this place to look a little more like two guys live here, but obviously, Gabrielle's shopping skills translates into her home decorating. There are vases and paintings. Clearly, HGTV is one of her favorite stations to watch.

"If it isn't Miss Siren!" Ethan says coming to hug me. His hug feels friendly, nothing more.

"Can I say jealous!" I say to him while looking around the apartment. "I need my own place." Thinking about just how crowded my house is right now.

"Why don't you have one, or live on campus?" He asks me. I could kick myself for saying anything. I am not allowed to live on my own just, yet. Relapse is the number one reason I am not. I need a good excuse.

"Cheaper to live with my grandmother than to live on campus," I answer, pretending that somehow money is truly the barrier to my freedom. I know he will believe me though. Being a broke college student is not an exception but the rule. I am the exception. I could afford this whole house by myself if I wanted to. My Black Card taking up residence in my wallet. I need people to believe my life is totally normal.

I look around to see if the third in the trio is around, but I can't.

"Where's Xavier?" I ask. It is his home, also, might as well say hi, right?

"Over there," Ethan points to a guy that is surrounded by others. He is chugging down a beer against another, while the rest cheer them on. I roll my eyes at the display. Amateurs. I walk over when they finish.

I notice his demeanor is different from the other day. He seems more confident and the life of the party. Not the sulking brat that I met the other day. I take in his entire outfit, a gray t-shirt that is just tight enough to show off the definition in his arms and chest. He definitely takes advantage of the college fitness center. Broad wide shoulders on his already tall frame. I do not remember all these details, but I was probably too distracted by his attitude the other day.

"Did you win?" I ask him as I approach. The other guys look at me, sizing me up. The flicker of desire showing in all their eyes. I ignore it, simply because I am used to it.

"Hey!" I startled him. I am not sure if that is a good thing or not. There is no way to tell if he is happy to see me or is annoyed by my presence. "Um... yeah, I definitely did win." He looks to the guy who lost, and Xavier smirks at him. He walks away and the other guys follow behind the loser. "You want one?"

He holds out a beer to me. My mouth begins to water. This is the closest I have been to alcohol in a long time and I feel like the can is calling my name. I reach out and gently brush my fingers against his, pushing it away. He looks down at my hand like he wants to take it and kiss it.

"No thank you! I hate the taste," I quickly say, to interrupt his thoughts.

"So, how do you have fun? We don't do anything more serious than beer here?" He asks me. Of course not, they are all in school to be doctors or scientists.

"I can have fun sober. You should try it sometimes," I reply. A deep chuckle is his response to me. 

"I don't need this as a source for fun. It just adds," he smirks, and his dimples show up. The sexiest dimples, I may add. "I am shocked you showed up."

"Why?"

"I thought for sure my cold demeanor the other day would keep you from this house," and just like that those sexy dimples are no longer sexy.

"I'm here for Ethan and Gabrielle. Not all three of you," I retort. He crosses his arms in front of him and glares at me, before the dimples, that are yes, still sexy, shut up, reappear. I cross my arms, mocking his stance.

"Then maybe I should try harder to keep you away," he quickly says and then walks off. He goes to find other guests. The deep roll of my eyes has me almost afraid they might get stuck. I look around the party. It's strange to be standing here with no drink in my hand. No pill to pop in my mouth. No blunt to smoke. Not even a cigarette. Everyone else has a red solo cup in their hands, some even have two. Talk about greedy.

I just need to make it through this party. So far, so good. I was able to turn down a beer, which would not have been the case a few months ago. I take in a deep breath and look for Gabrielle to join her. She's talking to her two friends Kristin and Brittany.

"Professor Price drives me insane," I can hear Kristin say as I approach. Kristin is a blonde who is a little bit taller than Gabrielle, but not taller than me. She is a thick girl. She is also quite proud of her size, too.

"What is my grandmother doing that drives you crazy?" I ask her. Kristin jumps at my question. Cookie has a reputation at the school for being a very hard professor. Luckily, I will not have to take her, since she works more with the pre-med and med students.

"Sorry, Kristin should've told you that Siren is the professor's granddaughter," Gabrielle explains to her. Brittany turns to me with a wide eye expression.

"Oh, you're the one she's always talking about," Brittany, their brunette friend chimes in. The tallest of the three, but still not taller than me. The horror begins to seep into me as I realize that my grandmother talks about me to her classes.

"Uh, yeah. Please tell me it's nothing embarrassing."

"Depends on your definition of embarrassing," Kristin replies. Gabrielle swats at her.

"I promise you, Siren, she doesn't say anything that would make you run and hide, just probably... cringe," Gabrielle says trying to calm my worst fears.

"Lovely." I think I need a conversation with a certain grandparent. While we continue to talk about things, Ethan runs up to Kristin and wraps his arms around her waist. He whispers into her ear and she giggles. He takes her hand and follows him, without even saying goodbye. Explains everything, I am not blonde enough or thick enough.

"At least they chose to get a room this time," Gabrielle says, watching Kristin and Ethan disappear into the hallway where his bedroom is.

"The night is young," Brittany quips, "They could still find time to gross us out. Kristin is a screamer." We all begin to laugh out loud.

"I saw you and the awkward tension that is X, earlier," Gabrielle tells me. Why was that her next thought after our last conversation?

"Oh, he was just letting me know that he wasn't pleased with my presence at this party," I explain to her. "I let him know that I wasn't here for him."

Gabrielle shakes her head. "Oh no...I expect that behavior from E!" She turns to the crowd of people dancing and drinking. She spots Xavier. "Hey X!"

He begins walking over and my heart rate quickens as he makes his way over. What is she about to do? Unpredictable is the best way to explain Gabrielle. I love it, but not at this moment.

"I've been summoned El?" He mockingly says to her.

"You've been rude to my guest?" She scolds him. She looks to me and he glares daggers at me as if I just told on him to his mother. Was she really that scary?

"Wow, did not peg you for a snitch." He smirks and those dimples are not as sexy as they were earlier.

"Wow, now I'm a snitch? I bought your food on Monday." I place my hands on my hips and glare at him. He looks down at me.

"Yeah, after you dropped my burger on the floor," he snaps. My mouth drops for a second at his attitude.

"I apologized several times. Where's E to slap the back of your head?"

Gabrielle slaps the back of his head and Brittany erupts into a ferocious laugh. I tried to stifle a laugh but couldn't. I was in too much shock at the speed of how she slapped the back of his head. He rubs the back of his head. He continues to glare at me and then shakes his head at me. I watch him walk away and one last time he looks back at me. I smile at him, knowing it'll rile him up.

"He's not the forgiving type, huh?"

Gabrielle shrugs her shoulders. The night continues as I get to know my schoolmates. While it is strange that a lot of them are all going into medicine or science. Like there isn't any other majors at the school. What is even weirder is that so many of them know Cookie, which means they have heard stories of me growing up. I need a paper bag over my head.

What is weirder than weird, as the night draws on, I can see Xavier staring at me, boring holes into my face, when he thinks I am not looking. I try to ignore him for most of the night. What I did find interesting was one of his friends questioned his strange demeanor that night.

Once the party was over, I headed over to Gabrielle's bedroom. She throws me what she calls a long t-shirt. It's long only for her. It's just a shirt that barely covers my butt. She is about five feet and four inches. I am five feet and nine inches. That is a big height gap. I climb into bed with her and I feel a hint of what it means to have a normal life. A fresh start feeling like it is definitely in reach for me.

"Look, both brother and sister got someone in their beds tonight." I joke with her. She laughs at my craziness.

"I have a feeling Ethan is having more fun. Well, it sounds like he is," she says while laughing. The noises coming from the other room sound very interesting.

We snuggle into the bed and I face her. I feel like a kid again. "What was it like?" I ask her. "Being raised by your mom and three different men all at once?"

"I don't know, it was our normal. Ethan is older by two years. Our mom had dumped his dad before finding out she was pregnant with him. He wanted to get back together with her, but she didn't."

"Seriously? Why not? A lot of women try to make it work," A lot of women do, but I would never be one of them. I can say I appreciate her mother for that.

"They were high school sweethearts and she grew out of love. But he loves Ethan. So, they co-parented. Ethan has six other siblings from his dad and stepmom."

I take in this information, trying to understand them better. "Wow... and what about your dad?"

She gives a faint smile before sighing. "I love him. He is an awesome father. But he's a man-w***e. Ethan's dad beat him up when he found out he cheated on my mom," she tells me. "They are friends now. Ethan and I spent weekends at both dad's houses. We never spent a weekend separated. Then our mom met our stepdad a few years ago. And now I have Blasian baby siblings. Definition of blended!"

She and Ethan are close it sounds like. Very close. "So, you would say E is your best friend?"

"Completely!" She says very quickly. "Isn't your sister yours?"

And I swear my heart skips a beat from her question. I can feel the color running from my face. Reality always seems to be able to slap you in the face when you least expect it.

"She... she was," I reply somberly, hoping that no tears threaten to spill while my heartaches. Gabrielle looks down at the bed, realizing what was wrong.

"I'm so sorry, Siren. I assumed you guys just went to separate schools. When did she die?" Now here comes the unbearable questions. The ones, I do not feel prepared to answer.

"February of last year, it's been eighteen months," I inform her. She nods her head.

"Oh wow, I am so sorry. May I ask how?" That's the question that will not be answered. It can't be answered. Well, not fully, anyway.

"Uh... car accident. I don't like talking about how she died." We both grow quiet. I can see Gabrielle is searching for something to say. Our silence begins to grow.

"Then we don't have to... do you mind sharing what she was like?" She asks instead. I give her a weak smile and nod my head.

"She was awesome...I was the brat between us. I would joke and tell her I wanted to be her when I grew up. I teased her all the time because she always felt like she had to be perfect. Sometimes, I wanted to have that desire. But honestly, I could care less. We were mirror twins. We were an exact mirror reflection of the other twin," I say, telling her about Calypso.

She was awesome. We looked like the other one but in reverse. Its tripped people up, too. Our personalities were opposites though. She cared too much, and I cared too little. It is her caring too much and me too little that is the reason she is dead. All the time I wish it was reversed. I wish I was the dead twin.

"Wow, I always wanted a twin," Gabrielle says sleepily.

"It's not all it's cracked up to be, trust me," I say yawning.

"You look so happy talking about her," Gabrielle compliments. I smile at her and she smiles back.

"Goodnight El."

"Goodnight S."

I watch as her eyelids close and mine follow behind hers.

I turn over and see that Gabrielle is still sleeping. Her room was completely dark. I turn over to see the clock and it is almost five in the morning. My throat is dry, and I forgot to grab a bottle of water to sit on the nightstand. This is a nightly routine for me. Every night I need to drink water. Tonight, I need cold water.

I creep out of her room and quietly make my way to the kitchen. I never know why I need to drink water in the middle of the night. I make my way to their kitchen. There isn't a door to their kitchen, just a long counter that divides the spaces. I make my way over to the fridge and open the door. The water bottles are in the back of the fridge. I bend down and dig through the takeout containers, beer, and soda, that is their fridge. I grab a bottle and open it up to drink.

I stare at the beer cans as I sip on the water in my hand. The temptation to just get a sip slowly begins to scream in my ear. I close my eyes for a second, wanting to just numb myself.

"You're letting all the cold air out," I hear Xavier say from behind me, making me jump.

"Sorry." I close the refrigerator door quickly.

"You use that word too much," he accuses me. I roll my eyes.

"Well, sorry... I mean, oh, shut up! I am not awake enough to bicker with you," I try to say feeling like an i***t. He is going to pay for that.

I turn around and see he's in the kitchen only in his underwear. Yes, he looks as impressive without his clothes as I thought he would. I tug on my t-shirt feeling very self-conscious of the fact that this does not cover even my massive butt. He walks over to me and opens the fridge and bends down. He goes to grab a bottle of water. I stare at his back. While it's sculpted, the skin is not smooth but scarred. He opens the bottle after closing the fridge door. He begins to drink while staring at me.

"I thought you didn't drink," he says to me, with odd curiosity.

"Huh?" Doesn't everyone drink water?

"I woke up with cotton mouth, what is your excuse?" He asks me.

"Old habit," I quickly respond. He continues to stare at me while he stands up against the fridge facing me. There is an island counter right behind my back. I stare back as awkward silence begins to grow like the ugly monster it is. "Is this your way of making sure I don't want to come back?

"Is it working?"

I roll my eyes and I go to step away from him. His hand slams down on the counter blocking my path. It would be menacing if the look in his didn't say something different. Like hunger? I step back to have an appropriate amount of space.

"So, I can't go back to bed?" I snap at him.

He smirks at me. "I am trying to figure out why my friends like you so much that they would both smack me in my head."

"I think it has more to do with you being an ass," I retorted, crossing my arms over my chest. "Now can I got to bed?'

"Hold on, one more question," he says. I suck my teeth at him to let him know I am not amused.

"What?" I place my hands on my hips and I watch as his eyes follow where I place my hands. His eyes slowly work their way back up to my face.

"If you're going to be spending a lot of time here, we need to at least be cordial. So, humor me," he says, his voice deep and raspy, "Why is your name Siren?"

Silly boy. I walk closer to him and use the fridge to brace myself as I go onto my toes to reach his ears. I lean in close to his lips and I watch his eyes follow my lips. I could tell if I stay there any longer, he would kiss me. I slowly move up the line of his jaw towards his ear. My lips graze his ears.

In a low whisper, I say, "To destroy men like you..."