I can’t stop focusing on this. I don’t want to stop. A part of me thought of calling her back to apologize and make an effort and another just wants to scream that I couldn’t care less if she wants me to be happy. The reason why I’m not offering her my smile is because I can’t form one any longer. “You seem pretty gloomy these days, it’s been a while now”.
A while.
A f*****g. while.
She doesn’t understand. She can hear, but she doesn’t listen.
So I didn’t call. After all, who wants to spend a day with a dead body? Because this is what I am now in the shadow of his agonizing absence.
I don’t want him to be at peace.“His spirit and love will always be here within us”. WHERE IS THIS LOVE? I can’t feel it, I can’t touch it. All I hear is the sound of glass shattering to the ground, ever
