All These Pesky Feelings

Asher

Fireworks explode between us. Brooke tastes like lemon, and when she doesn’t move away, I deepen the kiss, lifting a hand to her hair. The touch seems to bring her to her senses and she pulls away quickly, eyes wide. She’s blushing, but in her eyes I see something like…fear? Why would Brooke be afraid of me? She looks behind my shoulder then claps a hand to her mouth in surprise. A sinking feeling starts in my stomach as I turn and face the one person I least want to see right now. 

Delilah is standing in the doorway, rage flickering on her face. It’s dark, and I’m totally wasted, but I can tell that tears are welling up in her eyes. She turns back into the house and runs away. I sigh, then turn just in time to see Brooke standing and running after her. 

“No Brooke wait!” I catch her hand, and I feel her wince. I quickly let go, hurt bubbling inside me. 

“What?” she demands, giving me a scathing look. 

I open my mouth but nothing comes out. I want to say that I like her, really like her, and that I would do anything to kiss her again, but my brain is still muddled with alcohol and the words refuse to come. “I uh- liked the kiss.” I say stupidly, then curse all the vodka I drank. 

She glares at me again. “You i***t. Go talk to Delilah!” 

Delilah? Who…oh right. My girlfriend. I shake my head to try and clear it, but stumble and slump back down again. “Can you go?” I plead to Brooke. 

She gives me a look that clearly says she doesn’t think anyone could be stupider, but then nods and walks inside. I hang my head between my legs, the world turning fuzzier by the minute. My mind wanders while I wait for Brooke, and I find myself inventing a scenario where Brooke goes and tells Delilah that she’s crazy in love with me, then comes back outside and kisses me again. I imagine how it would feel to see Brooke sit next to me and wrap her arms around my neck…

A tap on my shoulder gets my attention, and I raise my head to see Brooke’s furious face. “God you are beautiful.” I say to her, and her face flushes even more. 

“You are an asshole, Asher Cowen.”

Huh. That’s not how it’s supposed to go. I grin up at her, “But I’m your asshole.” Wait, that did not sound how it was supposed to. I see her biting back a laugh, and I decide that making a complete fool of myself isn’t that bad if I got her to smile. 

“You really are obsessed with me, aren’t you?” she asks me, a calculating look in her gaze. 

I nod. “One hundred percent.” 

A realization seems to dawn on her, and she gives me a small smile. “Lucky for you, I’m feeling generous.”

She leans forward, grabbing my face between her hands and kisses me roughly. If I wasn’t sitting down my knees would have given out by now. She pulls back, and I beam up at her, even though the edges of my vision are really starting to blur now. She tucks something into my sweatshirt pocket, a small piece of paper it looks like, then turns to leave. Stopping by the doorway she gives me a little wave. 

“Call me in the morning Asher.” I blink, then try to call out for her to stay here, with me. We could talk, or kiss. Kissing was nice. But before I can say anything she’s gone, the door closing behind her. 

I lean back, smiling.  

***I wake to the smell of waffles and syrup. Sunlight streams through my window, creating patterns on the wall in front of me. The sound of rustling wind reaches my ears, and for a few moments everything is peaceful. 

Then I remember. 

Groaning, I drag a hand across my face as my headache hits me full-force, bringing with it the memories of last night. I don’t remember a lot of details, but I do remember the feel of Brooke’s lips on mine, and a vague feeling of discomfort. Why was I uncomfortable? I was f*****g kissing Brooke. Then I remember Delilah and curse out loud. What am I going to do about her? Did I at least talk to her last night? I can’t remember. 

I lean over to my bed stand and grab my phone. The small movement makes my head pound. How drunk was I last night? I turn on my phone, then turn away as the bright light hits me right in the face. I lower the glare then open the text app. A few messages on a group chat and a ton of missed calls from my mom, but nothing from Delilah. God, I can’t even remember who brought me home last night. Was it my mom? No, I think it was Ryan. Ugh I need an alka seltzer.

I finally get up, and after stumbling to the bathroom I pick up my sweatshirt from last night. I feel something in the pocket and pull it out. It’s a small piece of paper. I unfold it, and read a number. Underneath it says, Let’s meet for coffee. Call me, in small tidy handwriting. 

Suddenly I remember. Brooke gave me this after she kissed me. She kissed me. And I said...oh s**t. I made a complete fool of myself, didn’t I? 

I groan out loud for the hundredth time this morning. I don’t know if I can face Brooke, but if she wants to see me then who am I to deny her? 

Grinning a little to myself I type in her number and press call. She picks up on the third ring, sounding a little annoyed. I hear the sound of a TV in the background along with some shouting. I didn’t know her house was so busy.

“Hello?”

I can’t help the flutter that grows in my chest when I hear her voice. “Hey, it’s Asher.”

“Oh, hey Asher.” Her voice changes to a happier tone. “How are you doing? Not too hungover?” Did I hear right? Is Brooke Ortiz actually concerned over me? This must be the wrong number. 

“Uh, yeah, I’m okay. Just a hell of a headache.” 

“Oh that sucks. Did you take something?” 

Okay, this is definitely the wrong number. I want to know what changed between us. Was it something that happened last night? I wish this new attitude was because she realized she liked me after that kiss, but I have a feeling that’s not the right answer. I need to talk to her in person, understand what the hell is going on today. 

“Yeah I did. Um Brooke, are you free this afternoon?”

I wait to hear her hesitate and say this is all a mistake, but she answers enthusiastically. “Oh yeah. I know this great place a little out of town. Pick me up at say...five?” 

I can’t hide the grin on my face as I say “It’s a date.”