THE NEW ME VERSION 2.0

Chapter 15

After school, I'm standing on the sidewalk near the tennis courts. It feels like hours, but it's only been 7 minutes. I'll give you three more and then I'll go home. Before going out, I fixed my hair and makeup in the bathroom. I brushed my teeth. I also wore the new silk flower dress that I got before school started. I ran my hands through my hair again. I was thinking of taking a break when I saw him walking towards me.

"Hey! Are you really here?" he greeted me with a smile.

"I told you I would," I smiled back.

"Of course I know, so I wasn't confident," he says with a laugh.

"Lighten up." He grabs my hand. his heart stops. He doesn't seem to realize that everyone is watching us as he guides us to the parking lot. He stopped at the blue station where I got on yesterday and let me ride first. He climbed into his driver's seat, started his car, and gave me a sweet look.

"You look great, Mia."

I mutter "thank you" and look out the window, trying not to notice my blush. But then I saw them, men who must be his friends, staring at him, pointing at him, laughing.

"So where are you going?” I don't live in the world I live in.

"anywhere but here"

"Okay," he said with a laugh.

"Are you hungry?"

I shrug my shoulders. I don't feel like eating after a day.

"Okay, movie?"

"Is there anywhere to go where there are no people?" I am totally serious, but I try to laugh.

“There are people everywhere these days,” he smiles, still waiting for an answer.

"My parents had some business today, so I borrowed my mother's car to take them somewhere. Just specify the name of the place, anywhere is fine, let's go.”

"What are your parents doing?" I ask as thoughts form in my head. He stares at me like I'm crazy.

"If you're looking for ideas, I promise they won't do anything we want."

"No, I'm just wondering, how do I get to your house? No one, right?

He looks confused for a moment, but then a wave of clarity washes over his face.

"yes. I think we can. Where else would you like to go?”

He just smiles as he walks away.

Next thing I knew we were in the middle of his bedroom across from each other.

"Yes," he said, digging through the stack of CDs in the closet.

"What do you want to hear?" He still listens to CDs, which is rare. But my mind is running too fast to follow any more thoughts.

"Of course."

"What do you like?" he asks. "Anything."

He chooses his one of his CDs. It starts off calm and slow. he looks at me he puts his hand in his pocket. he takes her out again. Move her weight.

"Do you like it?" he asks. I have a feeling you're talking about music, but I wonder if that's the case

So it's like being with him. The answer is the same either way, so be honest and say,

"I don't know yet."

He sat on the bed and gestured to follow me. I can feel everything inside me pulsating fast as I move around in bed. A year ago, I couldn't have imagined being in the bedroom hallway of the man I so wanted dead that day. I found myself appreciating every detail of the situation.

Him, me, the distance between us, the softness of his duvet against my feet, and everything smells of clean laundry, The sports posters on the walls, wooden floors and curtains were a little noticeable. Fear binds me around, so I try to take a rough breath.

The lips are also slightly open. I waited for him to speak, but he didn't. His jaw is clenched and his teeth are chattering. I looked at his face more carefully than before. I thought his nose looked big at first, but it wasn't. Awkward, my brain whispered in 7th grade when I had to look up that word while reading a Sherlock Holmes book, but now I can't do it anymore. . Imagine a nose that fits your face more perfectly. And his eyes also look different colors every time.

My hands are on my knees and his fingers are interlaced. I wonder if his head works the same way mine does, or if his brain is switching to understand my face. For some reason I don't think so.

"Yes," he began.

"Are you Jameson Milton sister? Or is that what you mean?

"yes of course?"

"I don't know." He shrugged.

"We just talked. We used to play together." he was a wonderful man I didn't know he was your brother. Everyone who asked about you can only tell me this: You are a mystery. He smiles and raises an eyebrow. I don't know what he should say about it. Aren't I such a mystery? Is it that difficult to take apart? And what if I'm a w***e?

Maybe he didn't hear? He smiled at the corner of his mouth and asked me:

"What, you don't want to talk?"

"It's not about my brother."

He squeaks and I don't know if it's laughter or just a sigh, but he adds softly,

"Oh, me too." Speak broadly and broadly.

Voice Different from Marco. Marco is always flat and stern, precise and very loud. his voice is different. But with him everything is different. fine. I'm doing well He smiled again and he reached out his hand to touch my cheek even just a little. his heart almost stops. He nodded at the gap between us and said,

"Why are you there?"

I slowly slide towards him. he bends down I closed my eyes. Too intense, too scary to watch. I feel his lips pressed against mine. He kisses me I'm trying to let him go but I try not to think about the last time a boy kissed me.

This kiss back is not my first kiss. Not really, because I've never been kissed. I force myself to use everything I have and give it back. I can do this because I can. Before I realized what he was doing, he managed to get me to bed and I lay on my back. He reaches over me and deftly shifts his weight. His body slides next to mine. But just when I started to feel that this might actually be okay, might not actually be scary, I felt his fingers slide down the back of my neck. I can't do it, so my stomach is tight

Forget the fact that the boy put his hand around my neck and strangled me at the end.

I tell myself to be normal, be normal. wrong. But his hand was placed on my thigh and I stiffened. I can't get it out of my head. Because he can - what if he had chocolate eyes, a crooked nose, or a smile like a magnet - technically he can, he can do anything, And I won't be strong It was enough to stop him and no one will notice, because we are here alone, how the hell did we get here again? What was I thinking? His hand wandered over my thigh. His dress slips even further. I want to keep him away from me, I want to run away. His heart is pounding behind his ribs. He takes his mouth off and looks into my face. We try not to look creepy. But it's cold.

"What's wrong?" he asks quietly.

"Should I stop?"

I can't say "yes", but I can't say "no" either. I Close my eyes and search for words. But once I succeed, I'll be back there again. With Marco and Marco pressed my hands against the bed. And his hands, fingers like dull knives, slowly Grind to the bone. The more I tried to run away, the more he held me. I couldn't believe how strong he was. How weak I was I open my eyes I can't breathe Too much time has passed. There are worse things than silence, this silence. I know I have to say something, but I don't know what to say. So I just stared at the ceiling and spit out the words

"I have to go" so quietly that he couldn't hear me.

"what?"

"I don't know," I whisper. Because I don't know—I don't know anything now.

"No, I... know," he gasped. But when I look up and see his face, he doesn't seem to know or understand, and he seems to be as confused as I am. He ran his fingers through my hair as he leaned over to kiss me again.

"Really, um..." I began, pressing my hand against his chest.

"I have to go." But my hands do nothing. I can't move him. You can't move him an inch.

"I have to go!" his eyes widen as he does It lightens my load. I quickly get up and walk to the end of the bed. He grabs my hand and pulls me back. "Wait~"

"What..." My voice is too harsh, but I can't help it. My intuition tells me to yell and start hitting him. Saw off the hand he keeps away from my body if it means running away. but then Again, my instincts are a little confused right now, so I'll adjust my voice to be more calm and try again.

"what?"

"Nothing, just- what's the matter, why should I go?" I saw his hand still holding mine and he let go. "I thought it would be...".

"Where do you think you're going?" I paused and felt my eyes widen. "Nothing!" he said quickly.

"I thought I should go out—let's do something. I just thought I had time. I'm just confused Is it in one moment and out the next? I mean, did I do something? '

he asked quickly. I watch him carefully. I don't even know how to answer him. Did he do something or is it normal? Is it something that just people do? My mind is spinning round and round. I don't know what I feel, what I think, what I want.

"You're the one who made me want to come here," he said, not unkindly, but more like a reminder to me. "Have you changed your mind?"

"I'm fine," he said, as if he really was. We both sit next to each other on the edge of his bed. I will fix my dress he adjusts his shirt And then comes that awful silence again. I look out of her bedroom window. The sun is about to set.

"I think you should go." I told him as we approached the corner of the street. He stopped and looked around confusedly. "Where is your house?"

"There it is. That's fine."

He pulled over to the curb and turned off his headlights.

"So are we cool?"

he asks. "Yes, I think so."

he nodded.

"OK. Well, technically I haven't been anywhere so I don't really consider it a date. . . Can I still kiss you goodnight? '

he asked with a smile. Look around quickly to make sure there are no people around. When I turned my head back, he was already there, leaning forward. He kissed me softly once.

"Tomorrow," he began,

"as you know, we have this big foreign game, but after this we have a party. Do you want to go?"

"I can't believe it," I imagine all his friends pointing and whispering, and pretty girls coming from the bathroom giggling. Josh, witness. Worse, the participants.

"Why not?" he asked, offending him. In fact, it is a very popular occupation.

I have had the opportunity to interact with prom and homecoming former and future kings and queens. And I, as a mere farmer, dare to reject him. "Because I don't want to"--how should I say—

"I don't want to be your girlfriend."

He Roll his eyes, shake his head, and hold back his laughter. Probably not. He stared straight ahead for a few seconds, then turned to me on the passenger seat.

"Oh yes," he said slowly. Like that day in the hall a year ago when I was an invisible mouse girl.

"I didn't ask you to be my girlfriend. I was just wondering if you wanted to go to the party.”

"Well, it's not me." My voice has an authority I've never known.

"So." He tries to look easy. I am looking at the dashboard. The time changes from 6:00.

"Yes, is that the end?" he asks. I shrug my shoulders.

"Maybe not." Very calm. So I collected. How can I do that?

"Sorry, I don't understand you. So what exactly are we supposed to do?" he asked, with anger in his voice.

"I don't know. Can we meet someday--just take it easy, please?" Overflowing, he thought for a moment with a skeptical look on his face.

"I think that's probably the strangest thing a girl has ever said to me. Don't you want to go to this thing with me tomorrow night?" I asked again. "It should mean nothing."

"Look, I'm not going to discuss this. If you don't want to see me anymore, is that okay? But if you want to, so be it. I mean, that's right.”

He breathes in through his nose and exhales slowly through his mouth. I let out a big sigh. Imagine his fingers tickling the latch in urgency, trying to open the door and lock it.

"I don't know," he finally said hesitantly. He leaves without saying anything. I know he's looking at me as I walk home. I try not to turn around until I hear the engine stop around me. Looking up, there's nothing but his two red taillights glowing in the distance.