All I Want For Christmas Is You

Seven

The next day, I woke up earlier than usual, my mind already racing with the weight of what lay ahead. As I got dressed, I kept telling myself it was just a conversation. Nothing more. Just words exchanged between two people. But I couldn’t ignore the knot in my stomach.

I didn’t even know how to start the conversation. “Hi, Adrian, remember me? By the way, I have something important to tell you.” It sounded ridiculous in my head, and I was sure it would come out even worse in person.

I was unable to shake the nervous energy that had been building since last night. I ended up spending extra time getting ready, standing in front of the mirror longer than usual, smoothing my hair, and trying to steady my thoughts.

My mind raced as I replayed what I was about to do. How was I even going to start the conversation? Adrian was a star now, a professional athlete with fans, commitments, and a life I knew nothing about. I couldn’t just show up, drop this revelation, and expect it to be simple. How do I tell the man who wanted me to get an abortion I didn't get one and that I want him to be in the child's life?

Still, there was no turning back. I had scrolled through his social media the night before, analyzing every photo, every comment, every detail I could glean. The Blue Eagles have been posting pictures of their players training, confirming that the team was preparing for an upcoming game that weekend. It was obvious Adrian would be at the facility today.

Lisa had assured me that it wouldn’t be difficult to get in.

“My friend cleans there,” Lisa had said over coffeelast night. “They already agreed to help us out if we run into trouble. No one’s going to think you’re just some crazy fan.”

I had smiled weakly, but the reassurance only went so far.

By the time I was finishing up Kelvin bounded into the room, his excitement evident. He had been thrilled about the trip from the start, happy to spend time away from home and explore a new city.

“Mom, where are you going?” he asked, his head tilting curiously as he watched me zip up my bag.

I crouched down, meeting his gaze. His bright eyes shone with curiosity, his small hands gripping the edge of the doorframe.

“I’m just running a quick errand, sweetie,” I said, my voice soft but steady. “I’ll be back soon. After that, we’re going to go sightseeing, I heard there was a pack nearby. How does that sound?”

Kelvin’s face lit up at the mention of sightseeing. “Really? Can we make snowmen?”

I nodded, my lips curving into a smile. “Of course. We’ll do anything you want.”

He grinned and turned to run back into the hallway. As I stood up, my gaze lingered in the direction he went for a moment longer. I couldn’t help but notice how much he resembled Adrian—those same expressive eyes and the determined set of his jaw. The resemblance was undeniable, and it only strengthened my resolve.

I shook my head, brushing off the wave of emotion. Adrian deserved to know. More than that, Kelvin deserved to know his father.

Lisa was waiting downstairs when I finally came down, her keys in one hand and a steaming mug of coffee in the other. She leaned against the counter, watching as I grabbed my coat and boots

.

“You ready for this?” Lisa asked, arching an eyebrow.

I exhaled slowly, my hand tightening around the strap of my bag. “Not really. But I have to do it.”

Lisa smiled knowingly. “You’ll be fine. I've got your back if you need me. And besides, you’re not some random stranger showing up uninvited. You have a reason to be there.”

I nodded, my stomach twisting into knots despite Lisa’s reassurance.

“You’re doing this for Kelvin,” Lisa added. “That’s what matters.”

“I know,” I said, forcing a small smile. “That’s the only thing keeping me from backing out.”

Lisa set her mug down and crossed the room, placing a hand on Vanessa’s shoulder. “You got this”, she said and reached for come car keys “Now let's go find your baby daddy”.

I swallowed hard and nodded again with a small smile on my lips. “Let's get this over with.”

As we stepped outside, the brisk morning air stung my cheeks, waking my senses. Alright, this is it. It was now or never.