45
I arrive in a simple black dress, a pair of bangle earrings, and the faintest touch of lip-gloss, applied as an afterthought in case I run into anyone who might look at me long enough to notice. I know coming here today, when I’m not ready to face her, I’m taking a risk. But how can I move forward if I don’t dismantle the idols of my past?
Never mind that the first service doesn’t start until ten, her car’s already in the parking lot. She’ll have been inside since nine.
Whenever Chloe and I used to complain about how dumb it was that she made us get to church an hour early, Mom would say, “Give God this lifetime, and He’ll give you an eternity.”
But I’m grown-up now. So, I skip the before-church “hellos” and “I’ll pray for yous” and “we haven’t seen you since you were this bigs,” sl
