The Mate The Alpha Never Chose

Chapter 6

TYLER

You know what? I understood why Grandma was scared. This was hella scary. Even though we had a plan that promised to make everything alright-ish, there was still this fear that everything could go wrong. There was still a possibility that everything would go sideways. I hated that feeling. Now it began to feel like air was too hard to draw in whenever I thought about the whole thing.

I remembered those days in school when I had to act strong even though I was always scared that I would mess up and the world would know about werewolves and it would be my fault. Well, this felt like that all over again, only that it was worse now.

“Damn it,” I muttered as I found my hands shaking as they laid on my thighs. “This has to work out well. It just has to.“

Grandma was right to be scared. One moment, my biggest problem was my love life, the next moment; I was worrying about keeping the werewolf race alive. I couldn't rationalise staying calm when I knew that there were twenty Xirays out there in the world and they were probably killing every werewolf they came across. To exacerbate the predicament, this f*****g prophecy has made us known that Xirays had their job made easier for them. All they had to was kill me and that Ada girl… and boom… end of an entire race.

In three days, I would be twenty-eight f*****g years old. Grandma says birthdays are the most important celebrations. In her own words, “they are the king of everything worth celebrating”. I didn't think she was wrong even though I couldn't relate. For a while now, I haven't been excited about anything, especially my birthdays. While Grandma would have me believe that they were these special marks in one's life, to me, they were just a constant reminder of how far I've gone. And, no— I didn't mean that in a celebratory way. They reminded me of how long I've had this sadness inside of me, and how increasingly apparent it is becoming that this feeling of emptiness wasn't ever going away.

“I want to have kids,” I would say when I was younger. “I want two adorable girls and a little stubborn boy.”

When I was little, I had dreams like every other kid you would see. I had dreams of becoming a parent and building a family of my own. You know, all the good stuff, right? Now that I was of age to start thinking of actualising that dream, everything kept telling me that it wasn't ever going to be. Not in this lifetime.

You see, as a kid, my dream to be a parent was more personal than most kids'. I wanted my kids to grow up with their mother at their side because I never saw mine. I wanted them to have the best memories with their parents because I never had any of those either. More importantly, I wanted them to be able to look into the eyes of their father and see nothing but love— a love that doesn't judge; true love.

“You look like you're sadder than every last person in the world,” Johnny let out as he pulled a chair and reclined beside me. “Can’t blame you. You've just broken up with yet another girl and now you've been given even more reason to be sad.”

I shrugged, chuckling. “Life has it for me now, doesn't it?“

“The breaking up with Enid was definitely your fault. You enjoy hurting yourself.”

“Johnny, you just went through a break-up less than two months ago. Let's talk about that instead.”

Johnny raised a finger at me, clicking his tongue. “No. No. I won't have you make it look like it's the same thing. With Esme, things were going super fine with us. She just had to further her education abroad.” He paused, looked at me and then continued running his mouth. “You know, we ended things on a pretty positive note. You can't relate, brother.”

“Okay, let's assume you're as unbothered about it all as you pose to be, what about the issue you guys had?”

“What issue?”

“Don’t act dumb, Johnny. You're a natural, you don't need to act.”

He let out a chortle, patting me on the back halfway through his laughter. “Okay, that was funny. The thing is I haven't been enjoying s*x. I'm not sure I have ever really enjoyed s*x. I mean, as a kid, I thought I did, but now I don't know anymore. It's probably an issue of not having an emotional connection with girls… I mean, the girls I have dated. Or maybe I haven't found the right person yet. The right lady. ”

I tried suppressing a grin as I said “Yeah, the right lady”.

Every trace of a smile went off Johnny's face. “Don’t start now, Ty. I'm so not ready for that now.”

“I can only wonder why.”

He shook his head at me, biting his lower lip. “I'm not into guys, Ty. That was just a one-time thing in high school. That was like eleven years ago.”

“It’s fine, Johnny. You're whatever you say you are. But I want you to know that no one cares if you're into guys. I have said this way too many times. No one bloody cares! Definitely not me.”

The tone of his voice was a little higher than usual and he seemed to not be able to keep his hands still. “You know I've had relationships with girls ever since. I'm straight.”

“I’m pretty sure you know the ‘B’ in LGBTQIA+ doesn't stand for bicycle.”

He went quiet. I knew he wouldn't say anything anymore. He hated whenever I talked to him about the possibility that he liked guys. Look, I have been his best friend for as long as I can remember. I knew the guy. Now I wasn't saying this just because I walked in on him giving a blow job to one of our classmates when we were in our senior year in high school. It wasn't just that. It was the fact that I would often catch him admiring other guys in the gym and he would feel ashamed when he saw that I took notice of that.

Here was the thing. Johnny's father, a werewolf too, was a very ‘tough’ man. He always pushed Johnny to the limits because he claimed he wanted the best for his son. To me, it was more like he expected the best from his son. That sounded like a good thing until you remember that people had feelings and trying to separate those feelings from them often led them to very dark, lonely places.

I knew Johnny liked girls, but I was pretty sure he liked guys too. I couldn't say I knew much about sexuality, but denying a part of yourself is never a sign of growth. As his friend, I just hoped he knew that he didn't have to act all tough and mighty and that there was nothing wrong with going out with guys if he wanted to. I hoped he got to see that he had to be himself, even if that meant embarrassing his father whom he so much adored.

A black guy parked a sedan in front of our compound, knocking down a garbage can as he struggled to park the car properly.

“I know that guy,” Johnny stated, glad that he could change the subject.

“I recognise him, too. He has a bookstore downtown. I've also seen him in Ms Granger's home. She says he's a sweetheart.”

The guy didn't leave the car though he was parked just in front of our compound, which he did after knocking down the garbage can out front. We watched as he stayed in the car, seemingly lost in his thoughts.

It didn't take long before another guy who appeared to be lost, walked to the driver's side of the car and tapped on the window. The moment the guy in the car saw the one outside, he passed out, his head hitting the wheel of the car.

“Okay, that was weird,” Johnny said. “He was probably drunk.”

I nodded, in agreement with Johnny. “Yeah, that could be it.”

Something told me that wasn't it, but I couldn't think of any other reason either. When the guy in the car saw the one outside, even though I was observing from a distance, I saw something like fear in his eyes. I couldn't tell why he would be scared though.

“Excuse me, do you know where Tyler Conan lives?” The guy who just left the side of the car asked as he walked up to us.

“You're speaking to him. Can I help you?”

He brought forth his hands and some ridiculously long nails crept out, his eyes becoming completely dark. “Yes, you can.”

The nails were like werewolf claws. They were like regular human nails, just thicker and way longer.

He started walking up to us but turned and ran off when Grandma and Grandpa came out. I figured he wasn't ready to take on four werewolves on his own.

There we have it. I have seen my first Xiray. I didn't know which was more terrifying— the suddenness of the attack, or the fact that I knew they could find us. You know what? I have made up my mind. The latter was way more terrifying.

“I told you, Ty,” Grandma muttered. “This battle might just be tougher than any of us thought. Way tougher, Ty. Way, way harder.”

Grandpa was pacing on the lawn, both of his hands clenched by his side. “Shouldn’t we go after him?”

There was no response, but he, just like everyone else, knew that would be pointless. While I suspected werewolves were faster, I knew that the Xiray was far away already. Besides, it was daytime. There was only so much you could do without being seen.

“Hi, I'm Ethan Hutchins. Ms Granger wanted me to give this to you,” the guy who had passed out in the car said, walking towards me.

“You seemed to have passed out in the car. Anything the problem?”

Ethan's gaze lingered on the ground as if he saw something no one else could see. “You know,” he said, shrugging, “maybe I was seeing things because I could swear that I saw a monster-looking fellow tap on my window.”

For a second, I thought I saw Johnny and Ethan stealing glances at each other. But it could just be my mind.

The main question was: why the f**k was a human able to see the true form of a Xiray when even werewolves couldn't?