Chapter 26: We Start Learning How to Live Without Guessing
1152 Words
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Chapter Twenty-Six: We Start Learning How to Live Without Guessing
They started learning how to live without guessing.
Not all at once, but like learning to swim — first they choked on water, then slowly found the rhythm of breathing.
“You’ve been going to bed earlier,” Sable said.
“You’ve been waking up later,” Elara replied.
“Do you think I’ve been ignoring you?” Sable asked.
“You say it like you’re not sure,” Elara said.
“I’m not unsure,” Sable said. “I just want to hear you say it.”
“And what if I said I wanted you around more?” Elara asked.
“I’d believe you,” Sable said. “But you didn’t say it.”
“I did,” Elara said. “Just not directly.”
“Then next time, say it directly,” Sable said.
“You sure?” Elara asked. “Didn’t you used to say I’d hurt you if I was too direct?”
“I used to be scared of not understanding you,” Sable said. “Now I’m more scared of not understanding what you’re saying.”
“What’s the difference?” Elara asked.
“The difference is, one means you’re hiding from me,” Sable said. “The other means I just didn’t listen well.”
“You’re being intense,” Elara said.
“I’m just tired of guessing,” Sable said. “I want to know if you still want me to know things.”
“I always wanted you to,” Elara said. “I just didn’t know how to start.”
“Then start with ‘I don’t know how to start,’” Sable said.
“That sounds like something I’d say,” Elara smiled. “But this time, you’re not being sarcastic.”
“I wasn’t trying to be,” Sable said. “I just don’t want you to keep things inside.”
“I’m not keeping things inside,” Elara said. “I’m just… scared you’ll get tired of hearing them.”
“Do you get tired of hearing me?” Sable asked.
“No,” Elara said.
“Then why do you think I would?” Sable asked.
“Because sometimes when I talk too much, you go quiet,” Elara said.
“That’s me thinking,” Sable said. “Not me getting tired.”
“How was I supposed to know that?” Elara asked.
“Now you do,” Sable said.
“And what about next time?” Elara asked.
“Next time, I’ll tell you,” Sable said. “But you have to tell me, too.”
“Sounds like a deal,” Elara laughed.
“More like a mutual agreement,” Sable said.
“That sounds like you,” Elara said. “But this time, you’re serious.”
“I’ve always been serious,” Sable said. “You just didn’t take me seriously before.”
“I am now,” Elara said.
“Then let’s keep going,” Sable said.
“We’ll keep going,” Elara agreed.
They were learning how to “keep going” —
not by instinct,
but by practice.
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That night, they went to the kitchen to make something to eat.
“Do you remember the first time we cooked together?” Sable asked.
“I do,” Elara said. “You cried when you cut the onion.”
“I didn’t cry,” Sable said. “I was just reacting to the fumes.”
“You cried like the onion was personally attacking you,” Elara laughed.
“You didn’t even comfort me,” Sable said.
“I thought you looked kind of cute crying over an onion,” Elara said.
“Do you still think I’m cute when I cry?” Sable asked.
“Now I think you were fragile back then,” Elara said. “I was scared you’d break if I touched you.”
“And now?” Sable asked.
“Now I touched you,” Elara said. “And you didn’t break.”
“You always make it sound like you won,” Sable said.
“I didn’t win,” Elara said. “I just survived.”
“We both did,” Sable said.
“Yes,” Elara nodded. “But we survived differently.”
“What do you mean?” Sable asked.
“You survived by talking,” Elara said. “I survived by keeping things inside.”
“And now?” Sable asked.
“Now I want to learn to talk,” Elara said. “But you have to help me.”
“You’re not bad at it,” Sable said. “You’re just scared.”
“Yes,” Elara said. “I am.”
“Then I’ll stay with you,” Sable said. “Until you’re not.”
“That sounds like you,” Elara said. “But this time, you didn’t say ‘I’ll stay,’ you said ‘until you’re not scared.’”
“I’ve learned,” Sable smiled.
“And I’ve noticed,” Elara said.
They were learning how to “see” each other —
not through assumptions,
but through questions.
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The next morning, Elara woke up and found Sable already on the balcony.
“Did you sleep well?” Sable asked.
“Okay,” Elara said. “You?”
“I had a dream,” Sable said.
“What kind of dream?” Elara asked.
“One where we were fighting,” Sable said. “But not really fighting — more like we thought we were fighting in the dream, and then we woke up and realized we weren’t.”
“That sounds like you,” Elara said. “But you didn’t say ‘just a dream.’”
“Because it felt a little real,” Sable admitted. “I said things in the dream I hadn’t said out loud.”
“And now?” Elara asked. “Do you feel like saying them now?”
“A little,” Sable said.
“Then say them,” Elara said.
“Are you sure?” Sable asked.
“I’m sure,” Elara nodded.
“I want you around more,” Sable said. “Not because I need you, but because I like it when you are.”
“That sounds like you,” Elara said. “But this time, you actually said it.”
“I’ve learned,” Sable said.
“And I heard you,” Elara said. “I want you around more, too.”
“That sounds like you,” Sable smiled. “But this time, you didn’t hide.”
“I didn’t,” Elara said. “I’m just… learning how not to hide.”
“Then let’s learn together,” Sable said.
“Together,” Elara said.
They were learning how to be “together” —
not by habit,
but by choice.
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- Writer
