Behind a facade

2.

Tessa Brown lowered her gaze. A heavy sigh escaped from her. She ended up taking another sip of the drink, hoping it will be helpful to relax her messy mind.

Even a good wine couldn’t soothe the intense restlessness inside Tessa. She starts tapping her foot, without realizing what she was doing.

For a moment, she worried about her decision, regarding accepting the dinner invitation from the Holt residence. It is not like she is a stranger to Emma’s family members. She often visited the Holt residence since she became good friends with Emma. Unlike all those previous visits, this time visiting Emma’s place brought out agitating feelings in Tessa.

Tessa’s eyes betrayed her. She once again stole a glance at Dakota who is having a conversation with Carter Rooney; Josh’s older brother. Wide smiles on their faces clearly showed that they are enjoying the discussion. Their closeness wasn’t new to Tessa, because she knew Dakota Kent, Ryker Kent, Josh and Carter Rooney grew up together. Almost everyone in Lakeville was aware of the strong bond between the Rooney siblings and Kent Siblings since they were small children.

What was completely new to Tessa was the Dakota, who arrived in Lakeville a day earlier, for Emma and Josh’s wedding. The Dakota, she knew, was entirely different from the Dakota she met the previous day. Not only her physical appearance but also her aura and attitude have completely differed from the sixteen years old Dakota, whom Tessa used to know.

It was like meeting a total stranger.

Before Dakota left Lakeville, she was an approachable and considerate person though she wasn’t an extrovert. Her bold, behaviours sometimes brought trouble, but those acts made her stand out the most back then. There was no one like Dakota back in their high school days.

Tessa felt deeply hurt seeing the way Dakota has turned into a cold person. She was well aware of what causes a person to change into a completely different person from the way he or she used to be. Sometimes, the damage that comes with the change costs a lot more than someone even can imagine.

“DK has changed a lot. Isn’t it Tes?” Emma’s gentle voice startled Tessa. She noticed that Emma is looking at her as if she understood what is going on, in her mind. Her ears became hot because of embarrassment.

Tessa’s eyes eventually found Dakota again, who is attentively listening to something Carter was saying, while shoving some of her dark hair back away from her face, using her fingertips. The blue knee-ripped denim and black T-shirt accentuated Dakota’s slim, athletic body well. It wasn’t hard to see that she had grown one or two more inches taller compared to the last time Tessa saw Dakota. Back then also Dakota was a quite tall girl, but now she looks indeed on a different level with her height.

“Yeah… she looks like another person,” Tessa replied, looking at Dakota’s tan skin and short, messy hair. When they were in high school, Dakota Kent had medium-length hair and a cap she used to wear backwards that no one can forget about. For a strange unknown reason, Dakota’s sixteen years old image appeared in Tessa’s mind, giving her a sentimental feeling.

Emma let out a sigh. “Well, people change. DK seems more reserved compared to high school days, but…”

Tessa’s forehead furrowed. “But… what?”

“Never mind,”

“Please, I would like to hear what you think, Em,”

“Okay then… The cold DK is way more attractive. Don’t you think so?” Emma leaned back on the sofa. Her eyes remain on Tessa’s face for some time. “I mean that attitude suits her… in an alluring way,”

It took a minute for Tessa to convey her thoughts in words. She shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know”

Emma raised her brows after listening to Tessa. There was confusion in her round eyes.

“I mean, back then Dakota was…” Tessa engulfed her own words. She suddenly remembered the unfamiliar iciness in Dakota’s eyes. The warm brown eyes that used to look at her became unrecognizably cold. There was an invisible distance among them, which Tessa felt she could never able to reduce.

Whenever they face each other, Dakota behaves as if she had never known someone like Tessa in her entire life. The silence among them tormented Tessa more than she expected. Sharp pain that rose inside her chest whenever she thought about Dakota became unbearable, sometimes making Tessa feel pitiful inside.

Is she still expecting Dakota to treat her like in the old days? After the way, she treated Dakota in their high school days… how could she even think about it? The guilt overwhelmed Tessa until she start questioning herself.

The way people behaved in the past affected their lifestyle, to a certain level. If a person has done terrible things in the past, the weight of those bad deeds remains in a corner of his or her heart constantly reminding everything. Regret is the only outcome they ended up having in the end. Tessa knew this reality more than anyone else in Lakeville.

“Tess…,” Emma broke the heavy silence. She sat next to Tessa and placed her hand on Tessa’s hand.

“….”

“Why don’t you try to talk to DK? She is an understanding person,”

Emma’s suggestion brought a tiny hope to Tessa for a second. Then her mind starts to remind her that there is an unbreakable wall between Dakota and her. Tessa forced a smile. “I… maybe it’s better I leave her alone,”

“She may seem distant, but I believe deep down inside she is still the same Dakota,” said Emma.

Tessa tries to curve her lips feebly. The layers of unsettling emotions she was trying to bury inside climbed up again and challenged her. “I can understand if DK never wants to talk with me, after the troubles I have caused. Still, I wish she just smile with me a little. I mean not often, at least once in a while. I am pathetic, right? ”

“It’s not pathetic. Not at all,” Emma empathized. “I am sure Dakota won’t think like that too,”

A short moment of silence passed. “Maybe you are right Em. At least I have to try…,”

Someone cleared his throat, interrupting the girls’ conversation. When Tessa turned her head, she found Josh’s eyes that are blazing with anger. The look on his face made Tessa flinch. She suddenly got a déjà vu. It was clear Josh has heard their conversation.

The surrounding air abruptly became quite tense. No one bothered to break the silence for a few seconds.

It wasn’t a secret to Tessa that Josh didn’t like her or forgive her during all these years. Even though he let Emma keep her friendship with Tessa, he didn’t hesitate to show his hostility towards Tessa whenever he gets a chance. If not most of the time, he ignored her as if she is not in his eyesight.

“Emma, tell your friend to stay away from DK,” said Josh, using a warning tone. Then he averted his glare from Tessa, letting out a grumble.

“Baby,” Emma tried to ease the tension.

Josh pretended he didn’t recognize the pleading tone in Emma’s words. His jaws tightened. “No, babe… Please stop. You might be able to forget everything that happened in the past and you might be able to forgive her. But don’t expect the same from others.”

Tessa bit her lip, trying not to break down in front of Josh. His words exactly did what those words were supposed to do. Those words reopened a wound she tried to cover up for years with all of her genuine efforts.

“Stay away from DK. You have done more than enough in the past. I don’t want Dakota to go through the same hell because of your selfish actions again,”

This time, Josh directly addressed Tessa. She could see the disdain in Josh’s eyes. At that moment, she realized that she doesn’t want to see the same disdain in Dakota’s eyes at any cost. More like she knew that she is afraid to see it. She has no courage to endure it.

Tessa sensed her eyes becoming blurry. With a numb feeling, she looked away to hide her shaken situation.

She faintly heard footsteps walking away after a few seconds. Josh is walking away... Still, she remained like a stone statue while holding her eyes in such a way that kept the tears inside the lids.

She sensed a warm hand on one of her shoulders. Tessa slowly flashed a weak smile at Emma, who is looking at her worried manner.

Tessa could never understand the compassionate side of Emma, no matter how hard she tried. The understanding Emma, who believes in good in everyone, always amazed Tessa. It was something Tessa wasn’t able to do, even if she was born again. After how poorly Tessa treated Emma when they were in high school, Emma still forgave her and treats her like a good friend.

“Tess… don’t take Josh’s words to heart,”

“No… Em. I deserve this,” Tessa murmured. “We both know what I have done in the past,”

“Tess,” said Emma in a tight tone. “We can’t live in the past forever. It doesn’t do good for any of us. After all, you are not old Tessa. You have become a very good person. That’s all matters,”

“I… not me. If there is a good person, that’s you…”

Emma interrupted what Tessa was trying to say. “Oh, my god… stop! How long do I have to ask you that let bygones be bygones? This is damn awkward,”

Both girls burst into a peal of laughter. They have had similar conversations so many times before. It makes them able to predict what is about to come from each other’s mouths.

In the middle of the laugh, Tessa saw Dakota, who suddenly looked at them because of the loud laugh. Making Tessa feel empty, Dakota looked away as soon as their eyes met as if it is the most hated encounter of her life.

After another ever-lasting couple of minutes, Tessa excused herself and walk to the veranda. She leaned against a railing on the side, getting lost in her thoughts. Tessa always thought she is ready to face Dakota. She had so many things that she planned to tell Dakota whenever they meet again in the future. But in reality, when she met Dakota after a long time, she couldn’t find a single word. All she could do was end up getting hurt because of Dakota’s distant attitude.

The ominous silence and pitch darkness brought a chilly feeling to Tessa. She wrapped her hands around herself, looking at the sky. No matter what time of the day, Tessa found peace looking at the sky.

Suddenly, Tessa felt someone’s eyes on her. With that absurd feeling, she glanced at the other side of the road. Tessa straightened her body at once, seeing a shadow on the other side of the road. She jumped backwards, trying to cooperate with an alarming feeling she felt inside.

“Hey... do you need anything?” Tessa raised her voice, observing the shadow. With the distance, she couldn’t see the owner of the shadow.

The next second, the shadow disappeared into the darkness.