It's Not Easy

Chapter 3

Last night I could not sleep well. I was a bit scared to go to school. I was just wandering around the room checking out of the windows and myself full of nervous. .I felt strange closing my eyes. Strange things kept on appearing in my mind.

Those strange things were all about school. I even saw myself in the hall walking and everyone was laughing at me and I was crying.

Yesterday after dinner Mike came home with us after all the dragging mom did. Dad and mike went on the same car leaving me and mom on the other car. We started talking a bit about school for tomorrow.

"Do you miss your friends in Miami?" She asked focusing on the road.

"Yes mom." I said. I do miss them all. They were the nicest persons I've met. They made me forget everything which happened at Chicago and they also made me the happiest.

It was a sensation that Mike's friends were friendly yesterday including Emily, who is always not being friendly. They even welcomed mom and dad. But I stayed away from them.

Today is school and that's the reason I did not slept last night. It's around six in the morning right now and I'm still looking at the road from my window. The neighborhood is still silent and a bit chilly outside at this time.

I could feel the sun rising. The road is becoming lighter and the birds are starting their little songs in the morning. It's not unusual to see something like this in the morning. One by one vehicles started to move on the road. People who go to work earlier like this can only feel the morning chilliness.

This is the only thing which make me feel better in the morning. And sometimes the rain even helps me lot in the morning because I can stay with my book on the bed for a long time.

School starts at eight. And there's not much time left for me to get ready. I fold the blankets on my bed and arranged the pillows then I opened the windows.

I sauntered downstairs to find something for me to eat. Yesterday mom brought some croissants. Some were with chicken paste inside and some with melted chocolate. But I don't think that the chocolate is still melted since it was in the fridge.

I put both chocolate and chicken croissant in the microwave for me to eat in the morning as breakfast. Then I took an apple and sliced it. I sat next to the counter consumpting the slices when I heard someone approaching downstairs.

It was mom. She was still in her nightgown. And her hair was cluttered.

"I thought you were still sleeping." She said arranging her hair.

"No mom I could not sleep last night." I told her taking another bite of my sliced apple. Just in time the microwave beeped signifying that my croissants were reading to eat.

"Syrah is there something bothering you." I did presume that mom would ask this question at any time. I was not ready to answer this. But if I start answering I could not finish.

"No mom. I'm just happy to go to school today." I lied to mom. What mom asked me made me more nervous and I felt that what i said was stupid.

I took a plate and put both on the plate and went back to the counter. Mom already sat there at the counter eating the rest of the slices. Mom was the same old mom.

Her kindness is the same and the love for her family is what she keeps the most. She do care about us. Especially a lot about Mike. She do care about me too. She knew I would never end up like Mike.

"Mom you want some." I asked her pointing the plate towards her.

"No it's fine. I'll just have some afterwards. I'm not either hungry. Yesterday's pizza was the best, I think they just improved the quality of pizza."

"Yes mom I think so. The spaghetti was not bad itself." Last night I odder spaghetti. They made it taste better with herbs on it and also cheese on the top.

I started eating the chocolate croissant and the melted chocolate sensed tasty in my mouth. Chocolate flavor has been my favorite since I was a little kid. Every day after day care I dragged mom to the ice cream shop for her to buy chocolate ice-cream for me.

"Mom I think I'm going to take another one of this." I told mom as I waked up again from the counter to put another chocolate croissant into microwave.

"Sweetie you should start getting ready." Mom said staring at the clock. "It's almost seven and you know that we all need to get dressed up."

The reason for her to say that is because we only got two bathrooms in this house. We used to have three bathrooms in the house back at Miami. Plus she knows that both Mike and I we spend hours in the shower.

I finished the croissant and drank some orange juice. Mom told me to leave the plates in the sink that she'll wash it and go get ready.

I went to the bathroom and took my towel, toothbrush and tooth paste from my bag. I did not left them outside yesterday because the bathroom was a dusty.

I brushed my teeth and went under the shower. The hot water felt so heartfelt. I did not took time in the shower right now cause I knew that I was going to take time to curl up my hair and get dressed up.

I stayed in the shower about five minutes and came out. I wrapped the towel found me and went back to my room.

My clothes were still in the suitcase. I did not have time to put the agreeably in the closet. I searched for a blue skinny jeans. Then I a blouse. Then after finish dressing up I took my curler to curl my hair.

My black hair looked the same expect for the part that it has grown a bit longer. The color is the same. Mom doesn't like me bleaching my hair cause she doesn't want it ugly on me. Plus it's going to damage my hair a lot.

Then I applied a light red lipstick and some mascara. After I put on my black ankle high heel lacing boots which I bought when I went to shopping with my friends in Miami. It was their choice.

I already prepared my stuff in my hand bag for school. So I sprayed some perfume and applied some body lotion.

Then I went downstairs. Mike was already on the couch drinking hot chocolate. He was already dressed up. Mom was in the kitchen preparing something for her to eat. It seems she did not like the croissant that much.

"Syrah, Mike is going to drive you to the school." Mom said as she prepare herself a coffee. "You okay with that."

"Yes mom." I lied. To be honest I did not want Mike driving me to school. It feels bad every morning your brother is driving you to school and no one wants to start up a conversation. Unless Mike is asking me if he need to pick me up after school.

Most often it's me who walked alone after school from school to home. Sometimes I take the bus when I'm too tired to walk or dad pick me up after work.

The business company where dad works is next to our school. And that's an advantage for me in the morning and the afternoon.

Mom kissed both goodbye and we went outside. Mike opened the car and took the driver's seat, and I took the passenger's seat. We waved final goodbye to mom and Mike pulled the car to the driveway.

Dad is still sleeping. He sleeps until late like usual. The thing is that it doesn't matter at what time you arrive where dad works. They doesn't do anything about lateness. All they matters if your work is done by the end of the day.

I turned on the radio. There was nothing special expect for the morning talks, so I off the radio. It was strange Mike did not complained. He doesn't like me to on the radio when he is driving but I can't stand without putting on the radio.

Commonly at this time in the morning the road is a bit busy due to students driving to school and people going for work.

In the meantime I took my phone and scroll through the Pinterest looking at interesting pictures. My Pinterest is always full of pictures of celebrities and recipes. Every weekend I search for a new recipe and do it. I often bake a lot.

I searched the quotes section and looked for the best quote of the morning to post it on my i********: story.

They have a number of nice quotes. But it's difficult to choose one which feet's you when you know that you want all of this to happen to you on a bright morning. Sometimes a quote is the best way to talk. There are also negative quotes, but positive quotes have more meaning. My life was strange. Strange things happen most often and there are quotes to make it great. I learned a lot from quotes.

"Mike." I said interrupting the silence.

"Yes." He replied in a rude way. Its seems he doesn't want to talk to me but I must ask him this question right now or won't get a chance to ask.

Thinking that when I asked him this question he is not going to drive me after and before school I ask him the question straight forward in a way he could understand.

"Mike why did you ignore me at school and why don't you talk to me at school."

"Syrah it's not the time right now. And please stop intercepting me a focusing on this busy road."

"But Mike it's just a question and you only have to answer it." I said knowing that his temper is going to rise.

"Can you please shut up?" He shouted at me and continued to focus on the road.

I knew this would happen. Mike will never answer this question. I just can't believe that my own brother hates me. Sometimes I felt jealous for sisters with caring brothers. Mike was caring before he moved to Chicago. I just can't understand what happened to him.

"Syrah please don't bring up any of these questions with me again." He said turning his face at me with a serious one.

It's hard to survive when you messed up with Mike. At that moment he thinks that he is sort of a guy from wrestling.

My phone was still on my hand. I kept on seeing quotes everywhere around. I could not believe that I ruined the first morning of my school day.

All I wanted to do was bring everything back to gather and have friends in Chicago. Friends who deserves people like me by their side.

I continued to stroll on my phone.

No matter what is going to happen between Mike and me we can fix things back someday. But I want them to be fixed just between us, not when all of his friends are staring at us.

There is a sort of way where Mike likes to solve his problem. Like showing up himself in front of the whole school punching the guy and being the hero just because of his acting.

I continues to scroll through the Pinterest. I could not find myself a perfect fit. Just when I decide to put my phone away and something catch my eyes.

A quote which says "A NEW DAY A NEW BLESSING A NEW HOPE."

I felt like the quote was just written for me cause have a new blessing right now. I downloaded the picture and posted it on my i********: story hoping people to see that it's a new me.