What Love Feels Like

The mistake

The days have passed and I’ve been working for Mr. Young for a few weeks now it’s been constant coffee runs, constant meetings and simple tasks like setting his calendar for the day. It’s the best thing I have gotten in the last two years since adopting the twins. With losing my best friend just two years ago it has sunk in that I have needed to be mature and be a good mom to these kids. I know that I needed no distractions but it’s hard when you have one of the most eligible bachelors of all of Chicago as your boss. Also when you are always in a room with him or is a car driving to meetings.

I decided to go to the bar right by work to have a few drinks I remember going to this bar with Kells before she died. Today is the third anniversary of her death I still can’t believe she is dead I remember her always trying to set me up with guys and me always dismissing her. Also, all the times we would come here to celebrate anything this was our spot. I remember her and I came here the day she told me she was pregnant with twins. I also remember the night her ex showed up here with a gun wanting to kill her for wanting child support from him and him shooting her killing her. He killed her in cold blood because she kept their damn kids. I haven’t been here ever since but I want to come here to celebrate my job and her life. 

I ordered my signature drink which is just a scotch on the rocks and I ordered Kells drink too. I wanted to feel like she was still here even though she isn’t I want to be able to be the best mother for her kids but I know I won’t ever because she was the best god damn mother to her kids. Even though they were only a year when she died she was always there she was so amazing with them. As I was finishing my drinks I noticed a familiar face in the bar the I realized it was Mr. Young. He was walking over to me and he pulled a chair by me. “I hope you don’t mind me joining you I hate drinking alone.” I took the final few drops of my drink then responded. “Oh, I don’t mind at all Mr. Young I hate drinking alone too.” He had called the bartender over and ordered me another drink and himself a drink. 

“So why did you decided to come to this bar tonight,” he asked sweetly then taking a drink from his drink. “Well it’s the anniversary of my best friend’s death and she and I would always come here to celebrate anything. We loved it here so I thought why not have a drink or two to celebrate her life and old memories here.” He looked at me as shocked by my response. “I’m sorry but if you don’t mind me asking how did she die.”

“She was murdered by her kid’s father for taking him to court it was either he killed her or her twins so she sacrificed herself for them. It was right outside where she was murdered.” I said holding back tears I couldn’t cry in front of my new boss I gulped my drink down in one go drowning those tears, sadness, and anger down in one go. 

“I’m sorry for your loss that was an amazing thing your friend kid for her kids and a man to want to do that to his flesh and blood how can he possibly call himself a man after doing something like that.” He looked angry at the word that I had said. “I don’t get how he could do that to her at all she was just so amazing to everybody. Let’s not let us not dread on the past let us enjoy this night”.”I agree with that Cora another round”. “Are you trying to get me drunk Mr”.” Jackson, I am not your boss tonight I am just here to help you have fun and celebrate your friend’s life”.” Ok, Jackson what do you have in mind for me to have fun”. “You will find out Cora and will have the best night of your life.” We had a few shots and he pulled me out of the bar to a few places around Chicago. We had a few more drinks though out the night but I made the stupidest decision of my life and future one I will regret the next morning. I had slept with my f*****g boss I am so f****d the next morning.