Sacred Awakenings

Drinks

Willow

After our invocation, we close the circle and Kay goes home to Buck while Felix and I go to meet up with a friend of his for drinks. I don’t want to go home to Kyle yet so a drink or two sounds good right now.

We go to the local brewery and order appetizers and craft beer. As I sip my pumpkin ale, a gorgeous, brooding man walks up to us. His presence is nearly overwhelming. His looks are stunning!

I look into black eyes that are hooded and see a smile that speaks of dark delights curl his full lips. His large hand shakes mine as Felix introduces this masterpiece of a man to me.

“Willow, this is Aiden. Aiden, this is Willow. I am surprised that you haven’t met before now, but better late than never,” Felix says with a smile.

I know Felix well enough to know what his words mean. He’s saying that Aiden and I are destined to meet and he has seen it in one of his visions.

Aiden kisses the top of my hand, but the gesture is anything but sweet as his black eyes remain locked on mine and thoughts of heated encounters flash in their dark depths. This man intends to do deliciously dark and sexy things to me and I know it, but men like him only ever want me for such acts and then they drop me faster than the blink of an eye. There is something about him that nags at the back of my mind. I have seen him before, but my mind doesn’t want to make the connection.

I keep Felix between us as we chat and enjoy our drinks. That man may be attractive, but I have a boyfriend and I know those dangerously sexy types. One beer turns into two and they invite me to stay for a third. I am tempted, but I have a train to catch.

Before I leave, Aiden reaches his hand out to me and looks into my eyes again, his wicked smile inviting me to fall for him.

“It was a pleasure to meet you, Willow, but I would LOVE to see more of you. Would you go on a date with me?”

“Aiden, it has been a pleasure, but I can’t go out with you. I have a boyfriend,” I reply kindly but curtly.

“Just dinner alone to get to know one another better. We don’t even have to call it a date. I would love it if you agreed.”

Aiden tries to seduce me into bending the rules of dating. I am not stupid. I am a lot of things, but stupid is not one of them.

“I am sorry, but it would feel like cheating and I can’t be that girl,” I whisper.

“You can’t blame a man for trying. Until then, have a pleasant night and sweet dreams,” Aiden says as his thumb brushes over my knuckles.

I swear that man is charged up with static electricity. I got a shock with each touch.

It isn’t until I am on the train back to Boston that I feel like an elastic is pulling me towards where I need to be, but that isn’t where I am going,

My head swims and my eyes drift shut a few times while riding home, but I don’t dare fall asleep in its entirety. Flashes of Aiden's wicked smile and the dark promise in his eyes flash into my mind and an unexplained longing settles in my bones, but I know I can never give in.

“Why are you back so late?” Kyle roars as soon as I slip in the door.

He doesn’t even turn around to look at me, just keeps playing his video game, but I can feel the anger rolling off of him in waves. Before I can reply he starts again.

“You could call if you were staying late! Did you even think about me sitting here waiting for you? Do you purposely defy me and upset me? I didn’t even want you to go and then you stay out late! Are you stupid?”

“Calm down, Kyle. It’s no big deal, Felix and I got a drink before I went to the train. It’s no big deal,” I say.

“No big deal! Who did you meet up with? Or are you and Felix messing around?”

“Felix is gay and I am not interested in meeting anyone,” I state.

I have more than enough drama with Kyle in my life. I don’t need to mention Aiden since he will never be anything to me. He can’t be. I am sick of having my heart stomped on.

“You better not be lying,” Kyle grunts, but goes back to his usual stance with his face in the tv screen and his back to me.

He wants me to just sit here and watch him play games, not have a life of my own. He and his friends make a mess and he always wants me to clean it, but goddess forbid I have a drink with one of my few friends he hasn’t chased off.

I go directly to the shower and let the cool water run over my body. I let the weight of my emotions wash over me as I watch the water run down my large breasts and fat belly. My tears mix with the water of the shower, but as I lather up with my herbal body wash, a peace comes over me as my vision shows me a luxury shower and the back of a slender person with white and lavender hair. I don’t know what my psychic abilities are trying to show me, but it makes me warm. This doesn’t have to be how it is forever, but I don’t know how to make the changes that I crave.

By the time I am ready to climb into bed Kyle is already there facing the wall with his back to me. I slip in and am drifting off when his gruff voice reaches my ears.

“What no s*x?”

I swallow hard; I like s*x, but it feels like such a chore with Kyle. He doesn’t like me to touch him or roll my hips or pretty much anything. I am supposed to just lay there while he pumps in and out and attempts to stroke his own ego with “dirty talk”. His idea of dirty talk is telling me how wonderful he is while being completely underwhelming. I never get my orgasm, but he does.

Remind me why I even bother again?

Oh, yeah! I don’t want to be alone and no one else that I have dated sticks around. Once they get s*x, it seems all they want is the occasional f**k and if I am lucky conversation, rarely they take me out to dinner, but most just want s*x, not a relationship.

Sometimes, I feel lonely even with him right next to me, though. I don’t know how much longer I can do this.

Sexy dreams fill my head as I sleep. Images of Aiden and the things I could imagine him wanting to do with me and of that figure from the shower vision, only this time I see their face and it is beautiful. They are still hazy in my mind’s eye, but I wake up wanting relief from my unfulfilled desires. Sweat covers my body despite the September chill.

I dress for work and slip out the door into the dark streets of Boston. At 4 am the city is mostly quiet. Old blue laws mean that bars and clubs close at 2 am and the chill in the air has our homeless population huddled for warmth or seeking shelter. The walk to the coffee shop that I work at doesn’t take long and I take my keys out when I near the door.

After disarming the alarm, I bring in the freshly baked muffins and coffee cake that have been delivered to the back entrance. I feel like someone is watching from the back alley, but quickly lock the door and get to work brewing pots of coffee, filling air pots, drawing the flavor of the month and flavor of the week images next to their names on the chalkboard and arranging the baked goods in their display cases. As I await the rest of the morning crew, I fall into a daydream.

His hands run over my hips and his breath fans across my cheek as he presses his hard length against my backside and I swear I could feel him for real if I let myself, but the buzzer sounds and shakes me out of it. However, his voice remains in my mind.

“You have the power to manifest a new existence for yourself. What do you choose?”

That can’t be real. My mind wants it, wants him so badly that it’s playing tricks on me.

“Hey girl, you seem a bit dazed. What’s up?” Casey asks as she pulls off her coat and Lee hands me a flier for a new club.

“I just…I can’t really wrap my head around it. Something is nagging in my brain and Kyle was…well, Kyle last night.”

Both girls nod, they know how Kyle is.

“This place looks cool. The Onyx Room, huh? Kyle will never let me go there.”

“Girl, you gotta drop that man! He is deadweight,” Lee says, shaking her head.