Finally,Home

Prologue

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Finally, Home

Julia Ruth D. Albesa

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Prologue

Memories, they say that short term memory can hold activities, experiences and memories just for a short period of time, then suddenly, you will forget about it. While long term memories can store memories from the past. They said that when the brain ages, we started to forget things. Well, in my case I can say that I totally lost control of it. My memory is messed up by some kind of trauma. Somehow, it makes me strong but most of the time, it became my weakness. It became my fear and I don’t ever want to look back because it is hard to take back what we have already said, what our mouth opens for. It is hard to change what we have already done. It is scary what we might do, that we are not able to forget it. But it is harder if you don’t even know what they said that you have done that made them turn their backs away from you. The pain wont easily go away, it will scar you to the bones. Until, you have nothing left to do but to accept it, to take responsibility to something that you don’t know.

This time, I know that I was wrong, that this is my fault. I messed up so hard that I don’t even know if I can even accept myself. So, I have to go back were all of it started, that’s what they said, where they said my fear, nightmares and anxiety started. I never really wanted to, but I have to know for myself if I still can take back the memories I have lost. I have to know myself. I am Deborah Zhyn Peterson and this is my story, my journey and I am hoping that you can cope up with my messy life.