Chapter 0017
1354 Words
•KNOX•
I’d been staring at the same report for twenty minutes. The numbers made no sense anymore, and neither did my thoughts.
Every time I blinked, I saw her—Estelle. The way things happened before she could comprehend I was there that night.
I had followed her scent when I went to see her, and it led me straight to the cabin. If she had known it was me, she would’ve chased me out.
After I rejected her and masked our mate bond, I wasn’t supposed to smell her scent or have thoughts of nothing but her all day long.
The bond was broken, and so was everything that connected us. Yet, her scent on heat led me straight to where she was, and I did things with her that were meant for my future Luna.
I rubbed the back of my neck and leaned back in my chair. I should’ve been thinking about the pack’s schedules, training rotations—anything but her.
But it was useless. My brain kept replaying every moment we’d had together.
The door opened before I could gather myself, and that sweet, overdone vanilla perfume hit me. Seraphina.
She stepped in, smiling like she’d practiced it in the mirror. “You’ve been in here all morning,” she scoffed, closing the door behind her. “You didn’t even eat breakfast.”
“I wasn’t hungry.” I tried to sound casual, but it came out tired.
“Well, I made something for you.” She placed a container on the desk. “It’s chicken and rice. I even added the sauce you like.”
“Thanks,” I answered, glancing at it but not opening it.
I hadn’t told her what sauce I liked. She probably just guessed when she saw me pouring the sauce on my food.
Seraphina sat on the edge of the desk, too close. “You’ve been busy lately. When do you think we will have time for our honeymoon? Our marriage bed still hasn’t been consummated.”
“There’s no rush, Sera. We still have time.”
She tilted her head, studying me. “Fine. It would be a pity if you were consummating our marriage bed elsewhere, but with me.”
My heart skipped a beat. She wouldn’t have known where I was that night, would she?
“I thought I should let you know that there will be an announcement ceremony tomorrow night of our marriage. We would have to go for training for our future roles.” I announced, hoping it would deflect her attention since she suspected I had spent that night somewhere else.
Her eyes lit up immediately. “That’s good news. I won’t let you down as your Luna, Knox.” She leaned down, placing a soft kiss on my cheek.
She pulled back. “I’ll start planning something for the announcement. Maybe dinner afterward? The pack loves celebrations.”
“Whatever you think is best,” I answered.
“Alright,” she replied, grinning as she stood. “I’ll let you get back to work. Don’t forget to eat.”
She waved once before leaving, humming under her breath as she went. I stared at the door she’d closed and exhaled, leaning forward with my elbows on the desk.
What the hell was I doing?
I reached for my phone before I could talk myself out of it. Estelle’s number was still there, even though I’d deleted it twice this week. I didn’t even know what I wanted to say—only that I needed to hear her voice and apologize for rejecting her and masking our bond.
That sounded stupid, but nothing made sense than her.
The line rang twice before someone picked up. “Hello?” It wasn’t her. The voice was male, and I figured it might be her husband.
It surprised me because Estelle was in a cabin last night during her heat, which meant that she didn’t want to be with her husband.
“Who’s this?” I asked.
“Dan,” he answered. “Who’s asking?”
“Knox,” I replied. “I’m looking for Estelle.”
There was a pause. Then a short, amused laugh. “Of course you are.”
My grip on the phone tightened. “Where is she?”
“She’s not here,” Dan responded. “And even if she were, I’m not sure she’d want to talk to you.”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I asked.
He sighed, and I could almost picture the smirk on his face. “It means you should count yourself lucky, Knox. You wouldn’t have been able to handle a woman like her. And by the way, you’re lucky that you’ll be an Alpha after your father because I would’ve made you pay severely for humiliating me.”
The line went dead before I could answer.
I called my scout team immediately. “Check the cabin,” I ordered. “I want to know if she’s there.”
“Yes, sir,” came the reply.
Then came the waiting.
I tried to focus on work again, but my mind kept jumping back to the way she’d looked at me that night.
She’d been in heat. Her first shift was coming, and I’d known it. The moment I smelled it on her, I panicked. I told myself it was because it wasn’t the right time, that she wasn’t ready, that it would ruin her.
But deep down, I was scared. Because her heat meant her wolf had awakened, and that meant the bond between us was real. Unavoidable, but I walked away from it.
The phone buzzed, breaking the thought.
“Sir,” the scout said. “We searched the cabin. It’s empty. Looks like she left a while ago.”
“Tracks?” I asked.
“Some faint footprints near the tree line, but that’s it.”
I nodded to myself. “Alright. Keep searching the woods. Check the river trail too.”
“Yes, sir.”
When the call ended, I leaned back, staring at the ceiling. I didn’t even know if I was angry at Estelle for leaving, or at myself for giving her a reason to.
The clock ticked quietly on the wall. Outside, I could hear the faint sound of the younger wolves training. Their barks and laughter carried through the window. It made me ache. Things used to feel that simple once.
The phone buzzed again. Another call from my scout.
“We found something,” he said. “Fresh paw prints near the east border. Small. Female.”
“Are they hers?”
“Could be,” he said. “It’s too early to tell for sure.”
I didn’t respond immediately. My throat felt dry. “Keep tracking. Don’t approach if you find her. Just report back.”
“Yes, sir.”
When I hung up, I set the phone down slowly and stared at the forest outside.
She’d shifted. That meant she had her wolf now.
I felt a strange mix of pride and pain twist inside me. “Where are you, Estelle?” I murmured quietly, almost to myself.
The office felt too small. I stood and walked to the window, watching the trees sway in the wind. Somewhere out there, she was running, probably scared, maybe angry. Maybe she’d never look back.
And I couldn’t even blame her if she didn’t.
Behind me, the lunch Seraphina had made sat untouched. The smell of it made my stomach turn.
I didn’t know if I loved Estelle because I was supposed to or because, with her, I felt something real for the first time in years. But I knew I had made a choice today that had nothing to do with love.
The pack would have its Luna. Seraphina would get her dream, and I’d get to pretend I wasn’t breaking inside, but pretending only worked for so long.
As the sun went down and the shadows stretched across the floor, I whispered to myself again. “Come back, Estelle. Please.”
- Writer
