The Vampire Queen

Chapter Thirteen

Brielle P.O.V

It hurts. It hurts so bad. 

I don't know how long I was laying in my bed for the others have stopped coming in and are giving me space. Ive lost count on how many times the sun has set and then risen again. All I know is the excruciating pain, the pain that he caused when he broke the bond. all that time we spent together, looking at the stars or the crashing waves, talking about our dreams, even the night we made love or so I thought, wasted. the way he used to look at me and tell me he wanted to be with me. All those firework kisses and electric hugs clearly meant nothing to him if he could do this. does he even feel it? or is he walking around unfazed?

Ive never opened myself up to anyone apart from my family, they are the only ones who don't judge me, who love me unconditionally and yet I opened up to him. I let him see the me and worst of all I let myself care. I let myself feel and this is where it got me. 

Pain. heart-breaking pain.

I don't even know why it hurts so much we weren't even official and didnt complete the mating process and its not like this would of ever worked anyway. we were so different. destined to hate each other for what we are. It was always doomed and I was stupid enough to buy into the whole mate bond thing he said. I was foolish to let it in and I'm foolish for mopping over something that clearly was in my head.

Sighing I untangle myself from my bed and climb in the shower hoping it will help with the pain but I guess I'm not that lucky. but at least it helps wash the tears off my face.

I get out the shower reluctantly once the water turns cold and walk to the closet and pull on some leggings and a baggy shirt and throw my hair in a messy bun to keep it out my face. 

as I go to walk out my bedroom door I catch a glimpse of myself and turn to take a closer look. 

I look dead, the only thing giving away I'm still alive is the red nose and puffy bags under my blood shot eyes. I sigh and turn away having had enough of looking at the way I look.

I head down to the kitchen and grab myself a baggie and throw it in the microwave. I'm not really hungry but maybe it will help with the pain and make me feel less hollow inside. 

"look who finally came out her room" Owen says as he rests an arm on my shoulder and I lean into him , loving the comfort.

"how you doing?" he asks softly and kissing me on the top of my head.

"I'm....okay I guess." I shrug and take my baggie out the microwave and pour it in a mug.

"No your not, but you will be." He says as he softly smiles at me. I take a sip from my mug, not knowing how to reply to that.

"Tell you what. get your boots and jacket, lets go for a ride, a bit of air will do you good." He says as he ruffles my hair.

"Hey!!" I frown at him but it turns into a smile. He always knows how to cheer me up. He chuckles and walks out  the kitchen, probably going to get his keys and the helmets so I quickly run upstairs to get my stuff and actually feel a pang of excitement. maybe this is what I need, some fresh air and something productive to do.

I go to the mirror and quickly brush my hair and put it in  ponytail and slip on my combat boots and jacket and meet Owen out front by his bike.

"Ready?" he ask as he hands me a helmet. 

"Sure am, Where we off too?" I put the helmet that's been mine for years. I remember when i was little and he used to take me out in a side car for a ride around the edge of the cliffs. Even now its our thing to do together.

"to our usual spot" he says as he climbs on and I climb on behind him. 

"okay cool" I say as we head off for the drive. 

The ride was nice, the only sound I could here was the soft purr of the engine and waves crashing below as we drive along the cliffs edge.

The sun streamed through the towering trees and everything looked so happy and peaceful that it almost made me feel like I could be happy again. Almost.

but it also brought back memories of walking through the trees with him. memories of the sun lighting him up from behind. memories of us chasing each other, laying together watching the sun set and with each memory the pain comes back. 

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we pull to a stop in a little parking bay and place our helmets in a side bag on the bike.

"lets go for a walk" Owen suggests as he puts his arm around my shoulder and i just nod as we start to walk down the steps on to a deserted beach.

ever since I was little he would take me here and we would build sandcastles or run through the water.

"it hurts doesn't it?" he asks after a bit of silence.

"yeah" I whisper back, scared if I say it loud enough the pain with get worse, like admitting it will cause more. 

"it will get better" he says as he squeezes my shoulder. 

"will it ?" I turn and face him bring us both to a stop. "I mean he said we were mates, that we were made for each other and yet he went and kissed some one else and now all I feel is my heart being ripped in two and I just want it to stop."

"it will it just takes time, trust me, soon it will fade and when you see him all you will feel is empty." he assures me as he pulls me into a hug and rests his head on mine. 

"I hope so" I say and we fall back into silence as we continue walking the shore line.